Why are We Hiding?

Ethan's phone practically hummed off the table as he was lounging on his couch.

"Buzz me in." It read.

He lazily got up with an exhausted exhale and hit the button. It had been a long day and he couldn't help feeling a little defeated. He unlatched the door and opened it as she made her way in.

"Where's your key?"

"I didn't drive, I took a Lyft over," April answered as she gave him a quick kiss.

"No one is going to see your car, there are too many people in this city," he said with a scoff.

"I like to be careful," April stated as she set her bag down.

It contained the usual; her night scarf, pajama pants, and a change of clothes. Although why she ever brought pajama pants was anyone's guess. They never slept clothed. An extra tooth-brush and her special body wash were regular fixtures in his bathroom.

"Have you eaten?" Ethan asked as he strolled over to the fridge.

"Yeah I grabbed a quick bite before I left."

April noticed his slumped shoulders and lazy gait.

"Did I wake you?" she asked.

"I was just lounging…waiting on you," he responded.

"You look sleepy," she remarked coquettishly.

"Why?" Ethan started, "Do you want to go out?"

April rolled her eyes and took her coat off.

"No, I thought we could we burn off a little stress, but you know if you just want to hang out on the couch…" April said trailing off.

Ethan laughed and shook his head as he walked around his counter. He pulled her face in for a kiss, but his tongue would not let it end there. He walked her into his room and then to his bed.

The instances when their legs were intertwined under the covers or when April would trace her fingers through the grooves of his muscles on his stomach. Fingernails grazing each other's skin; the light kisses in the small nooks of shoulders and necks. In his bedroom as the brick and steel felt like a cage for him; it was a refuge for her. Any annoyances he had with her dissipated when he felt her skin; smelled her hair; tasted her lips.

They existed as something unique, raw, and vulnerable in those moments.

"Can I ask you to do something for me?" April asked.

He was playing with the tips of her fingers before lacing his through hers.

"Anything," Ethan answered as he raised her hand to kiss it.

"If we're put together on another case tomorrow; assign me some clean-up, anything gross. I'll take care of it."

"Okay…can I ask why?" he said with a perplexed smile.

"Doris thinks you gave her the worst scut work because we're sleeping together."

"I didn't realize I was doing that."

April raised both eyebrows with a smile.

"You do."

"If I start making you mop floors and letting old men crap on you can we finally stop sneaking around?"

April let out an exhausted sigh.

"April, I'm trying to understand, you say you don't see us as some kind of cliché, but then you don't want anyone to know…are you ashamed?"

"No, of course not."

"Then what?"

"Politics and social hierarchy aside?" April started, "Ethan, I lost so much last year; publicly. I came to work and showed all our co-workers my ring and invited everyone out to Molly's to celebrate and then at work I had to end my engagement."

"Do you think this all happened too fast; that people will judge you, think you moved on too fast?"

"No, but then there was the baby, I don't know when, but I found out at work and-," April started as her voice began to waver, "When I'm with you I don't feel like anyone or anything can take this away and I need that right now."

Ethan lifted her chin and kissed her. He pulled her in and cradle his body around hers.

"Okay."

He didn't say it, but he thought it.

"I love you April."