Author's note: Hiya! Tis' yet another set of poems. I seem to be writing
just poetry lately, ne? ^^; Yea, I know the title is misleading but I can't
be original enough to come up with good titles. I think I don't need to
tell you anything about these poems because they're pretty straight
forward. Maybe you can imagine them as letters (which were then ripped up
an put in the bin ;_;) Don't scan through them, read word by word. Because
I tried scanning through it and got no feeling out of it.

Warning: This is a bit shonen-ai (depends how you interpret it), so if you
don't like it or you're offended by it, then just don't read it. ^^;
You've been warned!!!!!(:P

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*
*
Fear
The fear of losing you
The fear of loving you
Secret
The secret I hide even from myself
The secret which I'm afraid will slip up and then..
You leave
You run away from me
You leave me all alone
Idle love
Because you'll never feel the way I do
Because without you I'm nothing
More than a friend
Everybody loves you, helping others before yourself
I can never say the same for myself
Unhappy
That worried smile you force yourself to wear
When I'm being my boring mean old self
Just drop it
I'm setting you free
To a better life that you deserve to live
Rain
You watch it all alone
Back in those memories, back you go
Under cover
It hurts me to say the things I do
You don't even know, I'd do anything for you
Tears
You will never see them hidden away
Under those purple shades I wear
Refrain
You will never suspect a thing
Of this secret, this pain, this fear I hold within myself
Deception
If it'd not exist, then I'd let you know, I would never let you go
Because I love you

*
*
*
Always the one I look up to
Always the one I can lean on
Always the flame in the dark
Always the flame in my heart

Always in a shell
Others see you as arrogant, proud, selfish
But I know the real you deep inside

Always that smile you hide
Until we're alone
Just the two of us

Always your best friend
You put up with my constant questions
And my constant whines

And yet,
Sometimes you stare right past me into space
Sometimes it's like I'm not even there
Sometimes afraid to show emotions
That I always hoped you had

Sometimes I make myself belief
That I mean something more to you
Sometimes I have to hope
You feel the way I do

Sometimes all you want is money
Sometimes you say it's your purpose in life
Sometimes you say money can make you happy
More than I?

Sometimes master Paul had said
"Sometime a time will come,
when you two will go your separate ways"
Sometimes I can't sleep, thinking
Once we finally get rich
Will you need me anymore?

Sometimes you're still a mystery to me
Those dark blue eyes like bottomless wells, I can't see
Always, I ask you questions, all the time
Yet this one, takes me years to ask, and many ahead
It's for what 'S' in Get Backers stands.

You might say it means we're not alone
But if I ask you, "maybe more than that?"
Maybe it would be more than the biggest regret

Losing all while trying to gain more than you have
I'll never have the courage to risk all that
I love you, even though I'm just your friend.
I love you, even though I'll never tell.
And being with you is what makes me happy for now
As much happiness as you offer me for just being there
I smile, falling asleep in your lap

Author's note: ^^ Did you enjoy? Please review it! Criticism welcome! But
don't be mean though! English is my second language! ^^; Do you think I
should make these poems into a one-shot story?
Thank you, minna-san (everyone) for reading! ^______^
Look forward to seeing more from me soon ^_~