Summary: He was praying now, not that he had ever done it before, so if he was doing it wrong he wouldn't have known.
Notes: This is a take on how I see Wally lamenting prior to informing Paula Crock that her daughter is "dead". Spoilers for Depths are in here, so if you haven't seen the episode, please turn back.
Disclaimer: I do not own any part of Young Justice or its characters.
The Sound
1…2…3…
His heart was racing at the sound of his hand tapping softly on the door. He was nearly pleading for the woman on the other side to have missed it completely. It didn't exactly hit him how difficult it would be to accomplish this part of the mission they had laid out. Months of preparing in the summer heat, making that pill that would freeze her up perfectly for a short moment of time. A moment long enough to convincingly prove to their teammates that she was in fact dead. He wasn't even sure how he thought it was a good idea to get involved, but he supposed that he didn't trust anyone else with this precious job. If those powders weren't mixed properly, then biting down on that pill could really end up being her death sentence.
"You only get so much time before your brain cells start dying off and then you really might as well wish you were dead," he added menacingly.
Maybe if he tried scaring the living daylights out of her she would change her mind about this, about the whole mission. Then they could continue doing what they had planned for the rest of the year. Studying Vietnamese Literature together, finally training Nelson to not chase after the cats wondering the streets right below their apartment complex, and that spring break trip to the Bahamas they had been hoping for ever since they started attending Stanford.
She only placed her hands on her hips before raising a brow in defiance, "Honestly, Wally. I trust you. We all trust you. What could go wrong?"
It wasn't until he had taken the pill himself one afternoon that she better understood the risks. She had come home after archery practice, and just found his body lying motionless on the floor. Even now he feels like he could never clearly articulate the experience. All he remembers was the world slowing down. Everything felt so heavy and his body no longer had the drive to function. His brain was the only thing left still faintly buzzing when he heard her keys jingling on the other side of the door. It felt like sleep paralysis except, it was incredibly quiet. There were no sounds and no light. And when he woke up, she was his first sight. It took him a moment, but when he could finally lift his hand to cup her damp face he smiled.
"It worked," he muttered weakly, his body still adjusting to being alive again.
She never answered him. All she could manage to do was slump forward until her head had found its place on his shoulder. He needed her to be that close because even if he didn't have Conner's super hearing, just the feeling of her erratic heart was enough to soothe him. He didn't want this for her. He wanted her heart to always beat, and never stop. It was the reason why he wanted no part in the actual mission. He was willing to have Dick handle all of it.
"I have to do this Wally. I hope one day you will understand why."
"You know what, Artemis? I can't say that I ever will."
Thinking on his words now as the stained door before him swung open, he felt like a selfish jerk. Though his thoughts dissolved when he saw a look of recognition on her mother's face followed by confusion. Paula was in the business long enough to put a puzzle together. People didn't just arrive at the doorstep willingly unless her daughter was with them.
The worried look was replaced by a welcoming smile, "Wally? I was certainly not expecting you. I don't think my fridge is ready for a visit from you. Come in."
She had wheeled herself away from the door to give him room to step into her small apartment. The blinds were still haphazard, some bent at awkward angles. They allowed for little peaks of moonlight to shine in eerily into the dimly lit room.
"Could you hit the switch? I was not exactly expecting any visitors this late at night, let alone you. Don't you an-" she paused suddenly as light flooded into the tiny kitchen, "Oh, wait let me get you something to eat. You must be famished coming all the way over here. I think I have some left over noodles. I know it's not much for your appetite, but they are delicious if I do say so myself. Nothing like fresh homemade broth!"
He never said a thing as she continued going back from the fridge to the kitchen and then back to the fridge to grab a number of things that she was going to heat up for him. It was too obvious.
"Would you like tea as well? A-A-Artemis always tells me that you really like it when she makes you tea. You know, I'm so proud of her," she started as her grip on the coffee pot got tighter.
The noise of the clicking stove as it tried to ignite a flame was the only sound the two were willing to listen to. She was the first to move, back turned towards him as she played with the knob. A light blue flame sparked and she blew softly for the fire to catch. She placed the put on top, and dumped the leftovers she had pulled from the refrigerator. It would be a minute or two before all of it would even begin to boil, but the entire time she refused to look at him.
Wally hated this. He hated the fact that his girlfriend had left him, and furious that she had left him with this task.
"You have to tell her," Artemis instructed, "It has to be believable."
"And why does it have to be me! I have to break the news to your mother. I have to be alone here in the apartment and tell everyone that you are dead. I have to stay here and sleep alone…wondering if my girlfriend is even going to be okay while she is coercing with the enemy. I have to sit up at night and really wonder if you are going to really die because of this, because of this stupid pill I had to make. Because I know that can't convince you to stay. Why am I the one who is going to suffer the most when you leave! Huh! YOU WANT TO ANSWER THAT!" he screeched out loud, "I must not be good enough…"
They both stood there looking at each other for a few minutes before she took the steps to close the gap between them. His hands had found their way into her soft mane, fingers curling around her golden locks as she whispered that he was good enough and that she would come back and that he wouldn't be alone for long.
He was praying now, not that he had ever done it before, so if he was doing it wrong he wouldn't have known.
She was sorry.
The smell of the simmering beef wafted in the air, and it was the first time that day that his stomach felt like reacting. It gurgled and turned, which caught Paula's attention enough to turn in her chair. Her right hand held the bowl while her free hand jerked her wheelchair forward. She set the bowl on the table before him, and watched as he took a seat.
"This was always a favorite of Artemis even though she keeps telling me not to make it. She always went on about red meat being bad to eat. Not that it ever stopped her from eating a bowl or two of it. I don't know if you remember the first time you came over for dinner, but she almost convinced me to make this for you. Though I promised her that I would have a different kind of meal that was much more satisfying than this," she continued feebly.
"It's perfect. Really, it is. I'm sure Artemis wo-"
"DON'T SAY HER NAME!" she cut in abruptly, "Don't say her name like she's okay. You! You wouldn't be here if she was okay!"
Her knuckles had gone white from gripping the armrests so tightly. The tears were gathering at the corners of her eyes, and her whole body was shaking. The fist that met the table next caused hot soup to fly up and sting his face.
Wally didn't bother wiping it away, his gaze trained on the fury and hurt that was on her face. Pure anguish that matched his during that failed mission exercise.
"She was supposed to graduate next year! And she was on a good path, and she was supposed to have the life I never had! I was happy that she went off to live with you. She was happy! SHE WAS SO HAPPY! Why would you let this happen to her?" she accused without hesitation.
The anguish was still there and she fisted her eyes as the tears came streaming down her face. His body reacted, pushing the chair back as he stepped forward, knelling before her. He accepted the arms that flung forward and clutched at him, grasping for the truth that Wally couldn't afford to give her.
He knew she wasn't dead, but she might as well have been.
