Disclaimer: It's not mine... I mean, the Harry Potter stuff isn't mine and the half-nursery rhyme isn't my either.
Also, the people who are talking might be kinda hard to keep track of, but just... I dunno, read carefully.
Warning: This contains implied slash. If you think stuff like that is gross, then please don't read it.
There was an old lady who lived in a flat,
One day she was searching the vent for her cat,
At once she heard voices that were quite unknown,
On listening she swiftly passed out with a groan.
And this is what she heard:
"James! Put. It. Down!"
"I don't wanna!"
"It's completely inconvenient!"
"On the contrary, dear, it's perfectly convenient."
"James. Believe me, it looks much better down."
"It doesn't work down!"
"It works for me!"
"Then why don't you put it down?"
"Because I end up putting it down at least three times a day! I'm sick and tired of it!"
"Why is it such a big deal? A minute is all it takes!"
"So? It's a wasted minute!"
"Why is it always my fault? When you use it, you never put it back up!"
"Well, EXCUSE me, but-"
[Sound of footsteps]
"Arguing again, Lily Flower? Doesn't this look amusing. I must say, Prongs, very nice appliance you've obtained there."
"Go away Sirius. Remus, come in here."
"Sirius! She said, GO AWAY! And don't touch!"
"Ahh... the joys of married life."
"That's not funny, Sirius! He got it for free somewhere!"
"Hey! It was a reliable source!"
"Oh, right, just like that time with the-"
"Chickens! Chickens! Stop bickering! Honestly, I'm getting a splitting headache."
"You keep going Sirius, and I'll give you a real splitting headache."
"No! I get to do it!"
"See? Fighting again! This is exactly why I decided to be gay. Watch and learn my friends, watch and learn."
"Oh no, not again..."
"Drrrrrrumroll please! Now, Remy, you tell our little lovebirds how we like it: up or............ up?"
[Hysterical laughter]
"Sirius. Shut. Up. You are SO embarrassing!"
"But it is always up! You can't deny that."
"I don't know, maybe we should put it down once in a while, just for the sake of it."
"NOOOOOO! Never! We can't do that!"
"Why not? It wouldn't hurt!"
"But the indignity! Think of my reputation as a man!"
[Chuckling]
"This is exactly why you're gay, right Padfoot?'
"James. Why don't you go flush yourself down the toilet?"
A/N: So. If you still don't get it, then please write me off as a really sick-minded person... Well, I had fun, anyway.
