Edgeworth for President
Ok, so this is about if Edgeworth ran for president…of the prosecutor's office. That's right, Lana wants to step down so she can spend more time with her sister, but she couldn't decided who to pick, so she decides the prosecutors should fight for the position and have an election. It would help if you read Franziska and the Nerds since the nerds make a comeback. The timeline is so messed up and the characters are OOC. I would say it just took place at a time, not really after any game. Let the fiasco begin…
Lana was upset, but she knew she was doing the right thing. All good things must come to an end and her good thing was about to close. She wanted to spend time with her sister, so she decided it was time to step down. There was only one problem: who was going to be her successor. She always thought Edgeworth would be perfect for the job, but not since Godot's arrival. He is also a valuable member of the prosecutor's office. Not to mention both von Karmas were perfect prosecutors. Who was she going to choose? She decided to have a meeting.
The crowd of prosecutors came walking to Lana's office. Something was up; it was not usually for Lana to hold meetings, especially with every prosecutor all at the same time. Something smelled fishy. Everyone was chattering as they walked in the office. They sat down at a big table Lana had put out just for the occasion. When she saw all her prosecutors seated at the table, she closed the door and came in.
"My dear prosecutors, there comes a time in everyone's life where something good must come to an end and now, my time has come…" Lana was quickly interrupted by a wailing fool.
"No, Lana, you can't die, you're too young!!" Winston Payne said as he cried. Everyone in the room looked at him then at Lana who was huffing and puffing.
"I am NOT dying, I am retiring!" Lana yelled at Mr. Payne. He slowly slid under the table.
"Retiring…why?" Edgeworth asked. He felt bad, but knew that if she left, he would be next in line.
"Well, my sister needs me and besides, it's someone else turn to have to big chair, so the person that will be taking my place is…" Again she was interrupted but this time by Edgeworth.
"Oh Lana, this is such a big honor. I accept. Now as my first assignment as chief prosecutor is to…" Lana gave him a scary look and he too sank in his chair.
"No, what I was saying is that the person that will be taking my place is to be decided through an election. I want the prosecutors to decide who they want to be their new boss. I do want to hear some nominations, though.
"That's easy, I nominate Edgeworth!" Winston Payne said. Manfred grumbled something to his daughter and Franziska raised her hand.
"I second that nomination. My old foolish father wanted to run, but I told him don't be a fool." Franziska said with a smug smile.
"Then Edgeworth is running, but we do need one other person." Everyone looked around to find an eligible candidate. Then, all of a sudden, he came in.
"Sorry, I was late, the coffee machine was broken and I had to run to the Mocha Café, where they make their coffee bitter and dark, like Hell." Godot said as she sniffed his coffee before guzzling it down. Edgeworth simply ignored him, he thought he was a loser, but Manfred did not.
"I nominate Godot to be the other candidate." Manfred said as he wagged his finger at Edgeworth. Everyone seemed to agree. This was not good, but Manfred needed a second person to second his nomination.
"I second myself for the nomination." Godot said as he took another sip from his coffee. This was not true! Godot vs. Edgeworth. Edgeworth gritted his teeth at the thought of this. He knew what to do…he needed a good campaign manager.
"Sorry, kid, but I'm too busy helping the candidates for the presidential election. You need to find yourself another guy." That was the last campaign manager there was in LA. Edgeworth could not believe it, he was up against one of the coolest guys in the whole world and he had no good campaign manager. Then, a miracle occurred. Two familiar faces heard the conundrum Edgeworth was having.
"Polo, did your ears sense that cry for help? That edging wearing prosecutor needs our aid. This is our opportunity to make our big break as campaign managers." Marco told his buddy who was doing math equations in his calculator. He was still very depressed from his broken heart and was not paying attention.
"Oh Marco, life does not matter anymore. My hopes and dreams have been browbeaten and I have nothing else to hold on to. My scrumptious celestial being does not care for me. Life is a very disheartening thing for me now." Polo said as he wiped his tears. He wasn't really doing math equations. Rather, he took a picture from the newspaper of Franziska and taped it on his calculator so he could stare at her.
"No, Polo, look. That chap in the maroon ensemble, doesn't he know your beloved German beauty?" Polo looked up and remembered that that man was the man he traded cards with not that long ago. This was his chance to meet Franziska again.
"Let's go help him Marco, perhaps she is with him." Marco and Polo collected their things and went up to Edgeworth, who was pretty upset right now. Marco cleared his throat and tapped on Edgeworth's shoulder. Edgeworth quickly turned around and saw the two nerds, looking up at him.
"Hello fellow member of the Homo Sapiens group. My comrade and I have heard that you are in a bit of a predicament and we would like to supply aid to you." Marco said as he extended a hand to Edgeworth. Edgeworth just looked at it without saying anything. Then he looked at Marco and Polo. He tried so hard not to laugh, but he could not resist.
"Aren't you the guys I traded cards with? You want to be my campaign managers? Are you serious?" Edgeworth rolled on the sidewalk with laughter. The nerds looked at each other then looked at the ground where Edgeworth was rolling. He was laughing hysterically and so hard that he was gasping for air. The nerds did not find anything funny. Marco took out his inhaler and sprayed Edgeworth in the face with it. After that, Edgeworth lessened his laughter.
"Oh...may I ask what is you find so humorous is. Polo and I do not seem to "get it"." Marco was frowning. Edgeworth then realized that it was not a joke.
"Oh, you guys are serious? Well, my answer is I'm desperate, but NOT that desperate. Go play with your little calculators. Please, a couple of nerds as my campaign managers. I might as well admit defeat to Godot all together." Edgeworth left the nerds standing all by themselves. They were puzzled at the fact the prosecutor had so little faith in them, but at the same time, they were mad.
"Marco, let's go find this Godot guy." Polo said as he thought of a devious plan. Marco was thinking the exact thing. They walked down the dark sidewalk together to find this mystery man.
"Oh Manfred, I'm so glad you agreed to be my campaign manager." Edgeworth said as he handed Manfred a whole bunch of signs with his face on it.
"Sure Edgeworth…what does a campaign manager exactly do anyway?" Manfred asked as he looked down at the signs with disgust. Edgeworth was smiling and the sign said "Vote for Edgeworth" and "Edgeworth for President." He thought that Edgeworth was taking this a little too serious.
"Well, you basically wear stuff with my face on it and tell people to vote for me as head of the prosecutor's office. Makes sense, right?" Manfred just stared at him as he was thinking.
"Oh, you mean stuff like this." Reaching into his briefcase, Manfred pulled out "Vote for Godot" shirts and a coffee mug that said "Godot loves the prosecutors as much as he loves coffee." Manfred then pulled out a plushy Godot toy that when it was squeezed, it spoke "Vote for Godot."
"What! No, Manfred, you have to wear stuff with MY picture on them, not Godot's." Edgeworth was a bit upset at the fact that Manfred was supporting the other side.
"Who would get anything with your face on it? Besides, Godot has the cooler things. Everyone has a Godot mug." Edgeworth couldn't believe his ears. He went out to the hall and saw what Manfred had said was true. Everyone had Godot merchandise, even Lana who was supposed to be neutral. Franziska came up to Edgeworth and her father. She was eating a lollipop was Godot's face on it. The wrapper was still in her hand and it read "Vote for Godot."
"Oh Edgeworth, you're a fool if you haven't had one of these delicious lollipops. I think they are coffee flavored, but they are so addicting." Edgeworth couldn't say anything. He was too horrified to see his "big sister" was supporting the other side. She was covered in head to toe in Godot things. She had a Godot shirt, a Godot cap, even her whip was covered in tape the read "Vote for Godot."
"So, that's just silly things. You also have to have brains to run a place like this." Edgeworth knew he would win in that department. Godot's brain was too filled with coffee to think clearly.
"Hey everyone, did you hear what Godot is saying. He thinks we all should be award a raise!" Winston shouted down the hall in his girly shriek. Everyone started cheering.
"But…But…that's not fair…" Edgeworth grumbled. "At least you are on my side Manfred, right?" Edgeworth turned to his campaign manager, who was off getting a Godot lollipop. Edgeworth followed him. "Manfred, we are supposed to be making lollipops to be putting my face on them." Manfred turned around and looked at Edgeworth as if he was kidding.
"Please, who would eat a lollipop with YOUR face on it? VOTE FOR GODOT!" Manfred joined the rest of the crowd.
"Fine, if he's not my campaign manager, I'll do it myself." And with that, Edgeworth grabbed his banner and dragged it outside.
"Ah, perfect, that is the perfect spot for the banner. Everyone will see it when the come in the prosecutor's office." Edgeworth was so happy with his sign. It wasn't anything spectacular. Basically it was a banner with his picture on it and in big bold letters read VOTE FOR EDGEWORTH AS CHIEF PROSECUTOR. Still, it was big and eye-catching. Edgeworth liked how it looked, fluttering in the wind. Then, all of a sudden, a laser beam shred through the banner.
"What the…" Edgeworth turned around to find his worst nightmares and they went by the names Marco and Polo. "What is the meaning of this?" Edgeworth was really distressed. The nerds just stared at him. Then, finally Marco stepped forward.
"I hope you find it in your heart to forgive us, but we currently need the space you have occupied with your atrocious banner for OUR candidate." Marco said as he took a puff of his inhaler.
"What! I don't care who your candidate is, you can't do that!" Edgeworth yelled. His face matched his suit, but the nerds did not feel threatened.
"Oh, but we just did. Our candidate is far more superior than you are and he deserves the room. You know why? Because he gave us the time of day when we offered our services and did not laugh." Polo said as he fixed his glasses. "Godot shall be a great leader."
Edgeworth could not believe his ears. They were helping Godot run for chief prosecutors. He was not going to admit defeat so easily. Sure, the nerds were pretty good. They got everyone hooked on the lollipops and on Godot stuff. And they were probably the ones that told Godot what to say, but he was better than Godot. He had to win.
Unfortunately for Edgeworth, the nerds were fighting their hardest. Between speeches and campaigning, Godot was hypnotizing everyone. Even Franziska did not care for Edgeworth, as she was on Godot's side. After failing miserable at the debate (the nerds gave Godot all the answers the people wanted to hear) and failing miserable at everything else, Edgeworth had nothing else to do. He knew he should have taken the nerds help, but now, there was nothing he could do.
