A/N: Welcome to what (I hope will be) the first in a series, of stories that take the characters of A:TLA and tell new stories with them, based on various fairy tales. The inspiration for this one, Golden Goose, comes from the Brothers Grimm. But various other elements are also my own invention as well.

I'd like to thank fellow author KSherwood for bringing the original tale to my attention, and for doing so much to create this story and make it ready for posting. Thanks so much, K!

All licensed characters belong to their rightful owners. I own nothing but my imagination.


Ty Lee looked exactly like her older sister. And her older sister looked exactly like the youngest sister. And she looked exactly like the eldest sister! For a while, Ty Lee enjoyed being part of this pack, but soon she felt smothered in a house full of girls who shared her face. So, without much sorrow from her family, the boisterous young woman left home to seek her fortune in the great, wide world.

She set off with only some rice and a bottle of water (all her mother would agree to give her), and began walking. Before long, she was in a deep, dark forest. She began to get hungry and so sat down to eat what her mother had given her.

Suddenly, Ty Lee heard a noise and looked up to see a very strange, very old man, staring at her.

She waved, cheerfully.

"You wouldn't happen to have an extra bite of rice, would you?" The old man asked, although, judging by the state of his robes, he would not ordinarily have to beg for food.

"Of course," Ty Lee said, cheerfully. "And if we could find something else to put it in, you could have some water, too!"

"But rice and water is a little boring," the old man said. "Anyway, lettuce eat!"

He stuffed a lettuce leaf into his mouth and chewed outlandishly. Ty Lee stared at him, and then at the feast her meager picnic had become. Then she joined him in eating. They ate and ate, until the feast was nearly gone. As Ty Lee repacked a little of it to save for later the old man spoke again.

"Since you shared your food with me, I'll give you something in return." He reached into his robe and pulled out, with an indignant honk, a large goose.

"Ooh! A goose!" Ty Lee reached out and hugged the bird, who honked again.

"Yes," the old man said. "But not just any goose. This goose is made of pure gold."

To make his point, he tapped the goose's neck, which made a metallic sound. Ty Lee stared in astonishment.

"Yes," he continued. "People will want to steal this goose. But they won't be able to! If anyone touches the goose without your permission, they'll be stuck to it! And they won't get free until you say the magic word!"

He cackled and snorted. Ty Lee thought for a moment then asked, "Please?"

"No, that's too obvious. The magic word is 'Suppiluliuma!' Only when you say that, will they be un-stuck."

"Wow," Ty Lee's eyes widened. "Thank you so much, mister! A goose! It's great! Suppiluliuma…."

The old man bowed and then disappeared, still cackling and snorting to himself.

She stared after him, puzzled, then tucked the goose under her arm, slid her bag of leftovers around her other shoulder, chirped, "C'mon, Goosey!" and continued on her way.

Before long the forest cleared into a small woodcutting village. A bored soldier noticed Ty Lee and her goose. He recognized the value of the bird and thought no harm would come from him plucking a feather or two for himself. He walked up behind her quietly, reached out and was not only stuck to the goose's tail, but completely frozen! His feet continued to mechanically move with the girl and her bird, however.

His partner noticed the soldier walking stiffly along with his hand stuck to the bird and called to his friend. "Hey, Lu! Where are you going? We have to muster in!"

When Lu didn't respond he reached out and tried to grab his friend by the shoulder. Unfortunately, he found himself stuck in a similar predicament. By now Ty Lee had noticed that she had company, but in the surprise of seeing the two soldiers stuck to her new goose, the magic word quickly left her head.

"Oh no!" She said to herself. "What is it? Sacajawea?"

Nothing happened, and in the meantime, an old nun noticed the two soldiers and shook her finger. "Shame!" She called out. "Following that girl around like that! Get back to your post!"

She seized the second soldier by the elbow and, sadly, met the same fate as the thief and his friend.

"Where are you going, sister?" A merchant demanded. "We haven't settled the perfume accounts yet!"

"Oh dear," Ty Lee stared at the lengthening line of people now stuck to her goose. "What is that word? Sarsaparilla? Sesame? Sancta-sanctorum? Seppuku-llama?"

The goose hissed angrily, and Ty Lee dropped it, causing the soldiers, nun, merchant, merchant's wife, and clerk to all fall down.

"Oh, no! I'm sorry!" With difficulty, she pulled everyone upright again. "Samarqand? No, I'll just have to find that old man again and ask him for help."

She thought, and then grimaced as a bird alighted on the clerk's head, and stuck, too. "He was wearing really fancy robes… I bet he's from the city! Nobody else dresses like that. So, off to Oma-Shu! I've always wanted to see that place anyway."

Now Oma-Shu was a large city of great wealth and intriguing history. At the moment, it was ruled over by an imperial governor who had a small son, who was himself like a ray of sunshine on earth. His sister, the governor's daughter, on the other hand, in all of her fifteen years, had never once smiled or laughed. At last, the governor and his wife decreed that anyone who could bring a smile to the face of his daughter (her name was Mai), could have her hand, as well as the rest of her, in marriage.

It was a beautiful day when Ty Lee arrived in Oma-Shu, now with no less than ten people and two more birds stiffly marching behind her, stuck to the goose. She was getting discouraged—it was hard to lug along the line, and there was no sign of the richly-dressed old man.

"Make way for the governor!" A herald shouted.

Ty Lee looked around, saw the entourage approaching, and moved out of the way. Unfortunately, her frozen companions could not move so swiftly, and the carriage was obliged to come to a sudden stop.

"What is the meaning of this," the governor snarled, indignantly.

His guards bit their tongues, noticing Ty Lee's dilemma, but also noticing that something was definitely wrong with the people holding stiffly to each other. The goose honked in reply.

A surprised smile crept onto Mai's mouth.

Ty Lee looked up apologetically at the aristocrats and saw embroidered lilies on Mai and her mother's dresses.

"I remember now!" She shouted then added, "Suppiluliuma!"

The soldiers, nun, merchant's family, herders, and curious child all fell in a heap.

A sharp "ha!" broke from Mai's lips. The governor's wife fainted, and her daughter rolled with laughter.

The baby joined his sister. The governor himself moaned, his face turning gray. "This cannot be."

But the footman was dancing in place on the back of the carriage, clapping and cheering. "It's happened at last! The governor's daughter laughed, so she must marry the comedian!"

People in the street, themselves staring and laughing at Ty Lee's predicament joined in the cheer, some of the clapping Ty Lee on the back. The goose did not like her holder being clapped hard on the back, however, and honked indignantly. The crowd moved back, but didn't stop cheering.

Ty Lee looked at Mai and smiled. It hadn't occurred to her that she would ever get to marry anyone's daughter, but Mai was beautiful, and Ty Lee could see she needed a happy influence in her life, so why not? Mai also gave Ty Lee an appreciative glance. The girl seemed genuine enough, and didn't actively seek her out in order to make her laugh and marry her, which put her well ahead of the aristocrat's last few suitors. And, Mai couldn't help but notice, this newcomer was very well-built. Though she didn't return Ty Lee's smile, she nodded in a friendly way, and did nothing when her brother began chewing on her hem.

At last the governor stood up and waved for silence.

"I'd be honored to marry your daughter, Mr. Governor, Your Highness," Ty Lee said. "But I am sorry I upset your wife so much."

"Er …" He looked down at his wife, still unconscious on the floor of the carriage. "Well, yes. I thank you for your concern. And since you know about my vow… it calls for a little more explanation. These are very unusual circumstances you understand. I can't just hand my daughter off to just anybody, you know."

"But wasn't that the point of the whole bit about making her laugh?"

Mai smiled again. The crowd began to murmur.

"We will continue this discussion in private," the governor declared. "One of you, bring her to the palace!"

One of the soldiers allowed Ty Lee to scramble up on his mount, the goose resting far too comfortably on her lap given the trouble it had caused, and they sped off towards the palace. When they arrived at the palace, she was brought to the governor's receiving room. He looked less nervous than before the crowd, and tad more arrogant.

"You see, my dear young girl, that even though vows are meant to be fulfilled, there is certain protocol to be observed! I am a very important man. Before I let my daughter marry I have to be sure that you'd make a suitable husb—er, spouse for her."

Ty Lee continued to smile in a friendly way. "So what do you need from me?"

"A test of… intelligence, among other things," he said. "I need you to solve the riddle of how a person… can be in more than one place at a time. If you can't solve that, you must give up all claims to my daughter's hand."

So Ty Lee gave her word, and asked that she have a horse and wagon to help in the task. The governor thought long and hard, and seeing no way for a horse and wagon to aid in a person being in more than one place at a time, gave permission. She rode back to her family's home, and on seeing her sisters together, explained her situation, asking them to return to Oma-Shu together. However, they laughed and called her a liar.

Ty Lee was upset, but not too angry that she couldn't think. So she put the goose down in the dirt and said, "I'm going inside for water. Don't touch Goosey. You'll get her pretty feathers dirty."

When she returned a few minutes later, all of her sisters were frozen. With some difficulty, she herded them into the wagon and returned to the city. In the governor's courtyard, she unfroze them (this time remembering the magic word right away), and, confronted with the evidence of truth, her sisters cooperated with her and stood in a straight line. When the governor came out, he was unable to identify Ty Lee, for it was indeed as though she was in many places at once, and conceded the task.

"Come inside and let us discuss the task of strength," he said.

So she said goodbye to her sisters again and followed the governor. The other girls started to return home, but instead joined a travelling circus, where for many years they used their uncanny resemblance to each other in magic and acrobatic acts.

But Ty Lee would know none of this, for now she was faced with the task of clearing a rock-filled, weed-choked plot of waste land to make room for a new tea-house. The task would begin at dawn the following morning, and had to be completed by sunset. Though very unhappy at the prospects of succeeding, she agreed, and went back to the room the governor issued her to rest and think.

She sat and thought, and had just given way to moping when someone knocked on her window. She opened it and found the strange, richly-dressed old man.

"Hello, Ty Lee," he said. "Oh dear, it seems my gift has gotten you into a bit of trouble, hasn't it? Although you've handled yourself well so far."

"Thank you," she said. "Sometimes being just another face in the crowd is useful. Hey… we're not on the ground floor."

"I was wondering when you'd notice that!" He laughed and snorted until tears ran down his face. "Come downstairs and join me! I have another animal that I think will help you."

He took her to the outskirts of the city, took out a peculiar whistle, and blew. Moments later, a thunderous rumbling rolled out of the mountains, and the trees began to sway. The ground shook a little as a giant white creature bounded into view.

"Flopsie!" The old man called out, spreading his arms wide. "Flopsie come here! Daddy wants a kiss."

The massive creature, Flopsie, did give him a kiss of sorts then began to sniff Ty Lee all over. The goose made it sneeze, however, with enough force to slam a set of shutters closed.

"Follow Ty Lee," the old man said. "She has a treat for you."

By the time Ty Lee and Flopsie reached the plot of waste land, it was nearly dawn, and the governor's men were already beginning to congregate to judge her ability to clear the land. On seeing Flopsie, they drew back. On seeing the weeds, the creature began to make strange bleating noises, indicating that it was excited.

"We have to wait until dawn," she said. "But then you can eat it all if you want to."

"Is that fair?" One of the judges asked. "Letting an animal eat it?"

"Well, she obviously has some kind of bond with this… beast. Do you want to argue with it?" Another said.

"Excellent point. Having any control over that animal is surely a sign of strength."

When the sky began to turn pink, Ty Lee allowed Flopsie to attack the plants. He ate furiously, uprooting the plants and throwing the stems and trunks aside, carelessly, including the rocks when they got in his way. Ty Lee carelessly cart-wheeled out of his way, and neatened up the piles, while the judges watched in awe. By the time the governor wandered to site to inspect the work, Flopsie was happily gnawing on a giant blue crystal, making purring sounds. The land was clear, and turned over and ready for building or planting.

Even though he was furious at being thwarted a second time, the governor, like his soldiers, had no desire to pick a fight with Flopsie and declared Ty Lee's success.

"Rest tonight," he said. "I'll think of your next task in the morning."

Ty Lee frowned, beginning to get a sense that there was less method to these tasks than he had initially said, but she agreed, hugged Flopsie, and told it to return to "Daddy." Back at the palace, she went back to her room and slept. It had been a couple of nights since she had slept well, but tired as she was, she awoke abruptly at the first tapping on her door.

Surprised to find it still dark, she tumbled out of bed and opened the door. Her eyes flew open when she saw the governor's daughter, Mai, standing there.

"Don't say anything," Mai drawled. "You don't know how to whisper."

Ty Lee nodded.

"I like you," Mai said. "And my father doesn't. He thinks he's found an impossible task for you tomorrow. Take this. I read about it in a book; you'll need it."

She pressed a cosmetics jar into Ty Lee's hand, made the "shh" gesture, and went away. Ty Lee stood in the doorway for a minute in confused silence, then she shut the door, and went back to bed. The goose crawled onto her chest and slept, too.

The next morning, the governor drove Ty Lee to a cliff at the edge of the city. A strange break in the ground glowed blue beneath them.

"Last year my wife dropped her favorite comb here," he said. "I want you to go into the cave and retrieve it."

"What's the catch?" Ty Lee asked.

"The caves are full of the creeping crystal," he explained. "And it grows best when attached to a heat source. You have to retrieve the comb without being encased in the crystals yourself."

"Yuck," she pulled a face.

The governor smirked a little.

The mouth of the cave was easy enough to find. Curious, Ty Lee placed her hand over one of the crystals at the entrance. It seemed to reach for her, and with a startled yelp, she withdrew her hand. The goose honked in alarm as well.

Then Ty Lee remembered what Mai had given her. She opened the jar, which contained some kind of oil, and rubbed it over her hands. Then she reached for the crystal again. It reacted the same way, but when she didn't yank her hand away, could not get a grip on her skin and slipped away.

"Oh." Ty Lee rubbed the oil all over her exposed skin, put the jar back in her pocket, and entered the cave. "Be good, Goosey!"

The goose honked and settled down into the grass as Ty Lee disappeared.

Inside was eerie. The crystals, which were still drawn to her, gave off a spooky glow, and for some reason the air gave off a peculiar sweet scent. She had to walk a surprisingly long time before she found the spot the governor had shown her from above. There was even a crack in some of the crystals, where something had hit. But there was no sign of a comb.

Ty Lee searched all the rest of the afternoon, but at last was forced to admit defeat when her ointment ran low. That's when she heard a familiar cackling.

The old man was sitting next to Goosey, combing his beard with a pearl comb.

"What do you think?" He asked.

"I don't think it's your color," Ty Lee said. "White on white is boring. You need something in pink or purple. To match your eye."

"Hmmm," he thought for a minute then threw her the comb. "Perhaps you're right."

He broke off one of the crystals with earth-bending and took a bite. "Jennamite is used for making rock candy, mmm!"

"But these crystals are dangerous!"

"Not if you know what you're doing. And that silly governor doesn't know his butt from his elbow, if you ask me."

"I think you're right," Ty Lee agreed. "But I should get back now. I'm running out of time."

"Invite me to the wedding," he said, waving cheerfully.

"How?" Ty Lee asked.

"Oh, don't worry. An invitation will find me." He cackled again, and disappeared into the ground.

Once again, the governor was forced to admit defeat and promised that plans for the wedding would begin the following day. Ty Lee went back to her room to bathe and rest, but was surprised, on leaving the bath, to find several soldiers waiting for her.

"Put something besides a towel on and come with us," the captain said. "The governor said to arrest you for the theft of his wife's precious oil."

Now Ty Lee was angry. She picked up Goosey, and held her out like a shield. "Stand back! I've got a goose, and I'm not afraid to use it!"

Goosey hissed, and flapped her wings menacingly.

The soldiers all took a few steps back.

"I didn't ask for any of this," Ty Lee said. "But I made Mai laugh, and that should have been it! But he doesn't like me, so he keeps trying to find a way out of letting us get married! Mai likes me, and she gave me the oil. Shouldn't she get a say in this? I mean, it's about her. Her dad isn't being fair. In fact, the more I think about it, the madder I get! I'm gonna go have a word with him now!"

The governor, who had been taking tea, was surprised to say the least, when the towel-clad Ty Lee, the goose, and his soldiers barged in without any ceremony. He could only sit agape as the girl gave him a piece of her mind. When she stopped for breath, the captain spoke up.

"For what it's worth, your Excellency, we're on her side."

The rest of the soldiers muttered in agreement, and the goose hissed again. Given the circumstances, the governor officially announced the betrothal of his daughter Mai to Ty Lee the comedian. Preparations began immediately, and as soon as all the sewing could be completed, the marriage took place with the whole city turning out, like it was a festival.

Ty Lee left an invitation to the wedding in the garden for the mysterious old man, and though she did not see his odd form at the splendid wedding, she did feel his presence and swore once or twice that she could hear him cackling. Also, Jennamite was not on the menu for the reception, yet two rock candy hearts sat enticingly at their place settings.

At last, the party died down and it was time for the newlyweds to leave for Mai's family's other house for their honeymoon. Mai shook her head ever so slightly as Ty Lee carefully loaded the golden goose into the carriage.

"I can't believe you're taking that thing on our honeymoon," she said.

"But if it weren't for Goosey, we wouldn't even be together!" Ty Lee cheerfully protested, petting the bird's head.

Mai chose a plush cushion for herself. "Fine. But it's not coming into our bedroom."

The goose honked.