Summary: Minerva McGonagall had been through 3 generations of Potters, but this one was worse than all of them combined. Written for Round 4 of the Quidditch League Fanfiction Competition.
Disclaimer: You wish J.K. Rowling wrote on this site.
Prompt number: 4 - Albus Severus Potter
Potters
In her one hundred odd years, Minerva McGonagall had encountered three generations of Potters.
First it had been Charles Potter, the charming man who had helped her in Transfiguration and broken the heart of every girl in Hogwarts (including hers, though she'd never admit it) when he finally went out with the clever and innovative Dorea Black, who left her family and everything it stood for as soon as she could.
Then James Potter came, looking so much like his father Minerva could never get Charles out of her head when she saw him. He had quickly made a name for himself with his mischief-making and talent in Transfigurations. It was ever amusing to watch him chase down Lily Evans, stubborn and studious and always seeking justice, defending almost all his victims, especially Severus.
And of course, there was Harry Potter, the Boy-Who-Lived, but more importantly for her, a Gryffindor worthy of the title. She had never let him see how much affection she had for the boy she had once bounced on her knee until he bumped into her one day, a single tear dripping onto Dumbledore's grave. Perhaps she had overcompensated, trying so hard to not show him favoritism in class. But behind his father's face and flying ability he had Lily's eyes, Lily's mannerisms, Lily's handwriting, and very often she had cried over one of his essays, remembering two of her favorite students.
His friends had not helped a whit. Sometimes she couldn't help but wonder if Hermione Granger and Ronald Weasley really weren't Lily and James incarnate to watch over their son. Hermione's eyes were not green, and Ginny's hair resembled Lily's much closer, but when she was helping Harry and Ron in class, answering a question, or standing up for her beliefs, Minerva could see Lily. She could only pity Severus. It was no wonder he had tried so hard to break her of the habit of quoting the textbook; that had been Lily's trademark. Hermione even did it with the same intonation.
Ron was less similar to James Potter. He was not talented at Transfigurations, for one thing. But he was innocent and fun-loving and tactless and just what Harry had needed, especially after growing up with the Dursleys. Minerva didn't know the details, but after taking one look at Harry she had been ready to fly to the Dursleys, do - she didn't even dare think what she would do, and then fight Albus for custody of Harry. Ron had given him what he needed - a friend that found him interesting but would see him as a person and not a savior or someone to manipulate. He had just talked, and made Harry laugh, and learn those values that all children should learn, and kept the three together.
But despite having known Charles, James, and Harry and their respective friends, Minerva had been utterly unprepared for the chaos that was the next generation.
"GRYFFINDOR!" the Sorting Hat announced and James Potter II jumped off the stool and ran to Minerva's old House, where he was welcomed happily and soon joined by Fred Weasley. Minerva pinched the bridge of her nose in resignation.
Two weeks later, Hogwarts changed color completely. Instead of the old black ("But it was so dull!") all the walls were suddenly splashed with color.
"Change it back!" Minerva ordered the unrepentant pranksters.
Fred and James shrugged, smiling innocently at her. "But we don't know how!"
Minerva sighed and behind her, the portraits of former Headmasters and Headmistresses looked with amusement or disapprovement at them. Severus glared especially hard. "You preformed a prank you didn't know how to reverse?"
"We didn't perform the prank," Fred protested earnestly.
"Yeah! You can't accuse us without proof. Aunt Hermione always says that anyone is innocent until proven guilty," James agreed.
"Unless you're Potter or Weasley spawn," Severus muttered. "Then you're guilty unless proven innocent."
Minerva choked back a laugh at Severus's comment, not quite believing that she was actually agreeing with him. And yet he had put it so perfectly.
She settled in for a long year.
The next year was, if possible, even worse.
This year was Albus Potter and Rose Weasley and Molly Weasley and Scorpius Malfoy, who threw Hogwarts in complete disarray almost instantly.
After Albus and Scorpius managed to get into the same House: "HUFFLEPUFF!" and were seen exchanging hi-fives, it really wasn't surprising when Rose and Molly went to "RAVENCLAW!" They had brains, after all.
It didn't take long for Fred and James to mockingly turn the two red and gold. Not having pranked Hufflepuffs directly before, they hadn't anticipated the reaction their House would have.
"Is it even possible to put a whole House in detention?" Minerva asked Albus's portrait wearily a week later.
Severus snickered and Minerva glared. "This is your namesake we're talking about."
A knock sounded and Minerva sighed. "Come in!"
Her breath hitched when she saw Albus Potter, looking even more like Harry from up close, and Scorpius, who resembled Draco Malfoy in everything but expression.
She concealed it hastily, though. "Yes?"
Albus slipped her a piece of paper that she hadn't seen him take out. She scanned it hastily and nearly fainted. It was a list of demands from Hufflepuff House that they wanted to be punishable by turning the student to Hufflepuffs. After seeing what revenge was like from the reputed "loyal" House, the very idea made her shudder.
Minerva composed herself and read it. Some of the demands, like the one that stopped people from calling Hufflepuffs weak (not that anyone would dare after this) were reasonable. Others…not so much.
"No, you may not administer Veritaserum freely. Merlin, where do you get these ideas?"
Albus and Scorpius smiled together, sending a shiver down Minerva's spine. "But Professor, it's a common way for Hufflepuffs to find justice. We do it regularly and it's fine, we swear."
Chancing a glance around at the portraits of former Heads, Minerva was shocked to find that the Hufflepuff ones were nodding. "Keeps anyone from being unfairly punished!" one of them said.
Shaking her head, Minerva moved down the list. It wasn't long before she stopped again. "You are not going to force students to help others with their homework."
"Again, it's common in Hufflepuff," Albus said calmly. "Promotes House unity and keeps all of our grades up, while teaching valuable skills in life. You can't deny that it's sensible, Professor."
Minerva didn't make another comment until she finally reached the end.
"I'm sorry, Mr. Potter and Mr. Malfoy, but I can't agree to all of this." She handed the paper back with marks on the parts she found unacceptable. "Please reconsider and in the meantime, kindly allow the Gryffindors to eat, read, sleep, and everything else that has been made impossible." She wasn't sure how they had put stinging hexes on the Gryffindor beds, but she was tired just seeing the starved and exhausted students. Of course, Severus fully supported the Hufflepuffs' actions.
The next day, Rose Weasley appeared with Molly Weasley II, with a list of demands the Ravenclaws had.
"We've decided to ally with the Hufflepuffs," she said cheerfully. "We consulted with them and we've compiled a new list of demands that hopefully you'll agree to."
Minerva closed her eyes, wondering how everything had gotten so bad. She steeled herself as she read the first line.
"No, you may NOT experiment on students!"
"It's all in the name of science, though," Rose said, looking at her with innocent eyes. "And if any of them die, we'll be sure to compensate their families nicely and write thoughtful letters of condolence."
Minerva actually banged her forehead onto the table this time.
"Are you okay, Professor?" Molly asked sweetly. Her eyes flew open into a look of concern. "Do you think the compensation wouldn't be necessary, perhaps?"
A gentle touch pulled Minerva out of her happy fantasies of running away. Looking into Rose's concerned eyes, she couldn't help but be very, very worried. How had this all gotten so bad?
As if reading her mind - she wouldn't put it past Rose to be able to - Rose responded, "You know, it wouldn't have gotten nearly so bad if the Gryffindors had just apologized instead of retaliating. But after that, well, these stem back centuries, you know."
No, she did not know. She did not know that Hufflepuff alumni had reunions every three days or that they were required to go to any Hufflepuff that needed help and called. She did not know that Ravenclaws had compounded centuries of blackmail because they could see everything; hear everything (though of course, they wouldn't tell anyone important information unless asked), or that they had the most cheaters and bullies of any House.
She did not know because nobody knew and nobody had bothered to know for the past few generations, at least. Suddenly she realized what they wanted.
"You just want to change things, don't you?" Minerva accused.
Genuine smiles appeared on Rose and Molly's face. "See?" Molly said. "I told you it would be worth it."
"What do you really want?" Minerva asked. She knew, or at least she thought she knew, but she wasn't willing to risk it. Not when there were students fainting from lack of sleep and food. The realization that Hufflepuffs genuinely didn't care about other Houses and Ravenclaws were fine with going so far to do what they believed was right was dizzying.
Rose and Molly looked at each other and smiled. "We want to break House boundaries," they said together.
"And you couldn't have just said so?" Severus's portrait muttered.
Minerva was almost looking forward to Lily Potter and Hugo Weasley. The sweet, innocent pair couldn't be worse than any of the others, right?
Wrong.
The "sweet, innocent" Lily and Hugo first proceeded to get into "SLYTHERIN!"
And then they turned life upside down for the nervous Hogwarts students.
As the last piece of Hogwarts fell in, Fred, James, Rose, Molly, Albus, and Scorpius all united with Lily and Hugo. Looking back, Minerva would realize that Lily and Hugo had been planning this since they knew about Hogwarts.
Completely disregarding every single unspoken rule of Hogwarts, they came to class wearing Muggle clothes, and persuaded most of their friends (including many Slytherins) to begin using Muggle supplies. There was technically no rule stating you had to be in uniform, just that you had to have robes. Wearing protective goggles and aprons in Potions class was practical rather than offending, though charming them onto everyone else as soon as they walked in was certainly not allowed. And how they managed to replace all of the portraits with comics, shows on history, and "live" battles was something Minerva still wondered about.
But educational and practical jokes aside; what they really did was worse.
They incited the House Elves into rebellion.
It was something Hermione Granger had tried to do, but she had failed and only gotten the House Elves to shun the Gryffindor tower, as Minerva later learned. But these children, with their well-placed words actually did it.
House Elves loved housework like Hermione loved reading, but they needed to survive, so for a while only the most privileged House Elves could clean and cook. The others searched for work.
Enter wizards.
Wizards disliked housework, so many House Elves would knock on doors looking for work and get food in return. One day, an intelligent House Elf made an agreement with a wizard. He would give her work, food, and shelter. In return, she would protect his family and never leave. Soon almost all House Elves had entered similar agreements. However, time passed, and wizards began to worry about other things, like inheritance. That one was simple; they tied the House Elves to a manor. Scared of their magic, they forced House Elves to punish themselves when they disobeyed.
At first House Elves tolerated this, but they liked it less and less very rapidly. Voldemort treating them like scum was only the breaking point. From then on, House Elves were determined that wizards would never mistreat them again. While most House Elves were unable to unite and were less educated as a whole, Hogwarts was the prime place for a rebellion.
Somehow, Albus, at least, must have known this. He persuaded Hufflepuff House that they should clean up after themselves and suddenly Hogwarts' House Elves lost a quarter of their work.
The next day they went on strike.
Minerva later learned that they had disappeared to clean up the Chamber of Secrets. But meanwhile, Hogwarts was in chaos. They had never before realized how much they depended on House Elves.
Slytherin House was the second to give in and just clean up after themselves, to much surprise. It was probably Lily and Hugo's influence. In fact, Gryffindor House was the most resistant, stubbornly refusing to do it for various reasons.
Minerva tried everything to get Albus to tell her where they were. He politely refused. Eventually she learned that every time she asked something in her office would be destroyed and she stopped.
When a House Elf representative appeared in her office, she didn't even wait for him to demonstrate how powerful a House Elf could be.
"Whatever you want, just tell me," Minerva said hastily.
Portraits behind her grumbled at the indignity but she shot them a withering glare and they shut up.
The House Elf smiled disarmingly. "Boppy and others want work and food and a place to stay. And we not want to hurt us. If we be happy, we be helping defend you too. Eee?"
"What does "eee" mean?"
"Here is mean how you say 'Yes?'."
Minerva suddenly realized that House Elves had a different language from them, to her shame. It explained the grammar. "I'm fine with that. I never liked the self-punishment, anyways."
Boppy looked confused. "Then why not stop?"
"Well…other wizards wouldn't like it.
"We not want stop working. We want not hurt us," Boppy stated.
Faced with his accusing eyes, Minerva felt guilty. Softly she said, "Minerva scared."
Boppy beamed as she used their way of speaking. "See? House Elf grammar smarter, eee?"
Minerva couldn't stop the laugh from escaping her lips. "How Minerva stop you hurt you?" She struggled with the odd grammar, but it was worth the light in Boppy's eyes.
Boppy beckoned and she followed him curiously, ignoring the stares she was getting from the rather conservative portraits. He led her to the place where the Head could control the wards. He pointed to a place Minerva had never noticed. "Not have this and free House Elves."
Minerva examined the tie he was pointing to. It was relatively easy to get rid of. She nodded to Boppy. "Minerva will do."
A smile spread across Boppy's face but he didn't leave. Minerva wasn't sure if she wanted him to watch, but if that was what he wanted, she was scared to press. The enchantment was harder to get rid of then she had thought, but when it disappeared, Boppy cheered. "Yay! Help because want, not have, and no stinky clothes!"
"House Elves hate clothes?" Minerva asked. "Why?"
Boppy gave her a look that clearly said she was stupid. "Why like clothes?"
Well, there was nothing she could say to that. Boppy waved one last time, and then disappeared.
Fortunately, there were no more major periods of starvation after that. Pranks henceforth involved well-designed historical plays, turning classrooms into Muggle-style ones, and elaborate welcomes designed for the incoming first years.
Minerva should have known something was up when the Pink Panther began playing as the first years came in. But she still wasn't prepared when she stood up and the Great Hall went dark.
And then there was a whistling sound as lights shot up and cracks as fireworks exploded in the night sky, the music changing to one of the Weird Sisters' most popular pieces. "Welcome, first years!" was written in the skies, before falling down again. Gasps were heard from below as every head turned up.
"LUMOS!" was shouted and a hundred wands seemed to have lit, the last fireworks fading.
Now two teams of brooms seemed to shoot overhead, illuminated by wandlight. Someone ducked when one person came too close, but the scene was an illusion and nothing more.
The snitch was caught and then it cracked open, a scroll seeming to fly out that said "Hogwarts, A History!"
Scenes flitted as the captivated audience watched Hogwarts and the rest of the Wizarding world through time. Someone screamed when they got to the Forbidden Forest and all that lay inside. It ended with the dramatic conclusion of the last battle - Of course they wouldn't mention all that recently happened, Minerva thought wryly - and then the lights came back on, the ceiling turned back into a starry night, and Minerva was left standing.
"Thank you, whoever put that presentation together, and 10 points from whoever's House," Minerva said.
There were chuckles before they silenced.
"I don't think I have anything more to say, except to thank the House Elves for this meal, so welcome back, and eat up!"
And the food appeared and life returned back to normal.
At least, as normal as life could get with students like hers!
Thanks for reading!
