I own Nothing
This is my first attempt at a one-shot. It's not normal. It's Chris and Brooke. I don't know why, but I have this weird obsession with Tyler Hilton lately and I needed to write this. It only took me two weeks to do it. What can I say? I'm slow.
The Way That We Meet and You Disappear
**
This isn't her. She doesn't do this anymore. She doesn't go out and drink herself stupid. This isn't her. She's grown up now, seen the error of her ways. She's classier than who she was at sixteen. This is Brooke Davis, fashion designer, not Brooke Davis, high school student.
So why is this fashion designer in a New York City bar staring at one of the worst one night stands of her life from across the room?
Lucas Scott's the answer.
He flew from L.A. to New York to see her. She doesn't know why it was her of all the people he called first after he learned his book was being published. They haven't really kept in touch over these last two years. He told her what happened with him and Peyton and honestly she thought her friend was stupid for giving up this man. But she knew they would work it out eventually – hopefully.
That night they spent together brought back old memories that Brooke didn't want to remember. They laughed and joked just like they used to before all the drama happened. For one night she forgot about the company and her mother and he forgot about Peyton and his book. For one night they were just being friends and nothing more…right?
He got a little drunk and maybe she had one too many too, but if her memory serves correct he kissed her. She dragged him back to his hotel room and made the dangerous move of looking into those blue eyes that trapped her heart long ago.
Sometimes she wondered if she ever got it back.
They sucked her in and touched her soul and when he pushed her against his body everything around them blurred. His lips were still the same – soft and gentle, passionate and intense. He was ready to rip her clothes off and fuck her stupid and so was she.
Later when you ask her about this she's going to blame it on the alcohol, but she knew exactly what was happening. She knew it the moment his hand reached for the zipper of her dress and knew there was no turning back when she reached for his belt. It all felt wrong to her and after she felt dirty. But it didn't matter. He wanted her and somewhere in her twisted mind she wanted him…right? Nothing matter in that hotel room that night. There was no Peyton or forgotten feelings. There was just them and nothing more.
And then it was over and everything else came back. They lay in that bed together, each one awkwardly staring up to the ceiling. They both knew what the other was thinking.
Peyton.
That head of curls popped into Brooke's mind and the thought of how bad she hurt this man.
And she did.
And Brooke just made it worse. They both took advantage of his broken heart and did the most stupid thing they could have done. And then Lucas did the second.
"It's you." He said out of nowhere.
"What?"
He turned his head, eyeing her down with those blue eyes. "When all my dreams come true - you're the one I want standing next to me."
"No I'm not."
His brow furrowed, not completely sure where she was taking it. "I'm not because you're not the one I want standing next to me when all my dreams come true." He opened his mouth to speak, leaning up on his elbow. "Go back to L.A., Lucas. Peyton's the one."
"No she's not." He shook his head, determined to win this one battle.
"Yes she is. And I know you Lucas. You're going to hide the fact that she is. Trust me. Peyton's it." She jumped out of bed, grabbing her dress on the way and quickly sliding it on. She went for the door, but stopped to give one last smile. "Good-bye Lucas."
He left the next morning. No note, or text, or phone call. She knew he was leaving and she knew it was going to be this way, but it still hurt her. It broke her heart. He always seemed to be doing that.
It was all a mistake – that night. It was never meant to happen. It wasn't Brooke and Lucas' love story. It was his and Peyton's. But that doesn't mean she didn't feel anything when he touched her body like he used to. Those forgotten places that Lucas knew so well brought back every emotion she felt for him in high school. The good and the bad. And maybe for a split second she fell in love with him again.
But like I said before she's not the one for him and he's not the one for her.
Then who is?
"Well, well if it isn't Brooke Davis." The voice traveled to her ears, bringing her out of her trance. She looked up to see the man she had been staring at wasn't across the room anymore, but beside her. The smug look she had when she first saw him was still intact. "It took you long enough to have another go with the Keller."
Finally she let herself take in his appearance. His clothes weren't tacky anymore; he wore a black button down with jeans. He didn't do that stupid comb back thing with his hair anymore; in fact his hair looked pretty good. Her eyes stumbled across the slight stubble on his chin leading up to his blue eyes. His appearance changed, not the personality.
"Look Keller," Brooke pointed in his face, "if I wanted to have 'another go' with anyone, you'd be the last."
"I like it when you're feisty." He said, ignoring her comment. She scoffed, turning back to her drink, not in the mood for this clown. He saw the hurt expression in her eyes and his expression soften at just the sight. It made sense now why she was in a smelly bar in downtown New York. She was hurt and maybe a little broken. "You want to talk?" He asked, more serious with his words.
She looked over to him in disbelief. The look on his face was the same when he asked her that question two years ago while in Honeygrove. That night she let her problems spill out and so did he. That night Brooke realized that Chris Keller was human.
"No." She said grabbing her things and paying for her drink.
He followed behind as she bolted out the door and onto the sidewalk. He didn't know why he was following her, but once he saw those hazel eyes he couldn't stop himself from following them. "Brooke!"
She kept going, not bothering to turn around.
"Brooke! Please!" His voice cracked, which he would blame on the weather, but they both knew it was because he wanted her to stay. She stopped, frozen to the ground, but still didn't bother to turn around.
He sighed, not sure where his mind at. "Look, let me walk you home."
"No thanks." She said only loud enough for him to hear.
"Brooke, it's a bad neighborhood, it's late, and you're walking alone. Just let me walk you." His voice sounded so full of emotion and honesty that he really cared. Maybe the personality really did change along with his appearance.
"OK."
He smiled walking over to her and placing his hand on the small of her back. She looked up to him and he didn't seem as phased by the gentle touch as she was. He led the way, even though he had no idea where they were going. They didn't talk much; mostly they enjoyed the night's sky. It wasn't until they reached her doorstep that his hand fell from her back. They faced one another, each staring into the other's eyes.
Brooke was first to break contact. He hoped she was going to invite him.
"Thanks again for walking me home."
"No problem." He said still looking down at her. "It was nice seeing you again." She could only nod before making her way to the door.
"Brooke." She stopped and turned to face him again. "Whatever you're going through just know that things get better."
"How do you know something's wrong?"
He shrugged. "I'm a musician. I always know when there's a problem."
She opened her mouth, but quickly closed it, not sure of how to respond. Wanting to invite him in, Broke fought an inner battle on all the reasons why she shouldn't. She was too emotional for this right now. She was vulnerable, and sensitive, and maybe a little weak. And the last thing she needed was a sweet, caring Chris Keller standing on her doorstep. So she turned and shut the door in his face, not able to mutter the word good-bye.
That was the last thing he expected her to do.
**
It was a month later when she heard that voice again. She was at work and on her way to her office when a quiet version of his voice filled her ears, causing her to instantly stop.
The girl in the breakroom sat a table eating her lunch with an earphone in one ear and the other blaring on the table. Brooke couldn't make out the song that was playing, but it attracted her into the room and over to the table.
The woman looked up to her, shocked to see that Brooke Davis was standing right next to her.
"Who…who is that?" She asked, already knowing the answer. She just felt the need to ask.
The woman looked to her iPod, lighting up the screen. She looked back up to Brooke, the smile still on. "Chris Keller."
**
He was in an airport when he saw her face again. He had been recording in L.A. and was now flying back to New York where he would start packing so he could move to L.A.
There she was on the cover of her own magazine, looking stronger and independent as ever. She didn't look like the broken girl he had seen almost three months ago.
He tried calling her, contacting her in anyway. Just to see how she was doing. But she would never answer. He knew she was ignoring him and he didn't know why. He didn't know what he did that she was so scared to pick up the phone. He just wanted to know that she was OK.
And she was apparently.
His flight number was called and he had to go. He picked up the magazine and waited for the woman behind the counter to ring him up; ignoring the strange stare she was giving him. When he reached his seat on the plane all he could do was stare at those hazel eyes.
It took him a few hours to tear his eyes away from the beauty on the cover and actually open the magazine.
**
Peyton met a guy and from what she heard from Haley, Lucas met a girl. Everyone knew the two love birds were running from their true feelings for each other. They were scared to admit it and afraid of how things would turn out if they did. So they hid their feelings in other people they thought they loved.
But they didn't.
And when those people were gone they were going to fall hard. But for now they seemed happy, so everyone was going to let them be happy because they deserved to be. Everyone was happy: Lucas, Peyton, Nathan and Haley. Everyone.
Everyone except Brooke.
She flew to L.A. needing a vacation from her company and her mother, mostly because she wanted to see her best friend. They hadn't seen each other in almost a year, their phone calls were shortening, and it was coming to the point where they lived completely different lives.
Somewhere deep down Brooke thought this it, that there was no more friendship. They were just too busy to be best friends anymore; work and distance got in the way and broke up a ten year friendship. But they were going to try this little trip and see what was left of them.
Immediately, they hugged and squealed and talked about their lives when they first saw each other. It was fun to see her friend again, but by Peyton's appearance made her kind of sad that she's missed out on so much of her life these past two years. Brooke talked about work and all the celebrity spotlight she was getting. Peyton talked about her job and Julian, her new boyfriend, of course.
Peyton had a concert she had to go to for work that night. Brooke, never the one to miss a party, tagged along. It was at a small club, nothing big, but with a lot of people.
Brooke and Peyton walked up in there looking hot as ever. Brooke wearing a red cocktail dress while Peyton wore a blue summer dress. They walked over to the bar and ordered their drinks. Brooke asked where Julian was and Peyton responded with a devious grin saying he would be here later.
Brooke decided it would be best if she didn't go back to Peyton's that night.
"What about you B. Davis? Who's the man in your life?" Peyton asked over the loud music the DJ was playing.
Brooke shook her head. "There's no man."
"What?" Peyton yelled in disbelief. "Brooke Davis without a man. Has the world come to an end?"
"I just haven't found the right guy yet." She shrugged. "What about you? Is Julian the one?" She asked, knowing the answer to her own question. She just wondered if Peyton knew.
"Maybe." Peyton nodded.
I guess not.
Missing the opening act completely, Peyton and Brooke fixated their eyes on the band playing their first song of the night. They let the music guide their bodies over to the dance floor as their hips swayed and smiles plastered on their faces. It was just like old times now. Brooke felt like she was back in high school at TRIC dancing along to a Fall Out Boy song or Lupe Fiasco.
Then Julian showed up and ruined the moment.
He swooped in and grabbed Peyton by the hand and never took his eyes off her. Brooke continued to dance, attracting the attention from the other gentlemen in the crowd. One guy came up, drunk of course, and placed his hands along her hips as Brooke moved from side to side.
For a second she forgot about it all. About the company, her mother, the fact that she was alone. Then she let her eyes travel over to a happy Peyton and an equally happy Julian. They were laughing about something one of them had said and had love written all over them. It was the first time in a long time that she had seen Peyton this happy. Maybe she didn't need Lucas. Maybe she did.
And then she thought about the last time she was happy.
She couldn't remember.
She knew it was back in high school, in Tree Hill with her friends, but she couldn't remember the exact moment. Seeing Peyton and Julian became too hard for her and she couldn't stand here and watch anymore. She backed away from the guy in front of her, much to the displeasure of him, and maneuvered herself around the crowds of people.
All she wanted to do was go home, back to New York. Right now she didn't care about seeing Peyton. She just wanted to go back to her penthouse and cuddle up in her blanket and eat tubs of ice cream until she explodes. No phone calls, texts, or interruptions at all.
She never expected to run into him.
"Brooke?" His voice called out as she tried to walk past him. "Brooke!" He called out again once he knew it was her. He study that magazine long enough to know that chestnut hair anywhere. And after months of no contact, her she was in L.A. at a show he was opening for and she was leaving. He ran up and stepped in front of her, blocking her path.
"Chris!" She groaned, not in the mood for this.
"How are you?" He asked, ignoring her whine.
"Fine." She mumbled.
"No you're not." She opened her mouth to defend with a glare, but he interrupted. "What's wrong?"
"Nothing." She huffed. The look he gave called her bullshit. She sighed, running her fingers through her hair knowing she wasn't going to win this battle. "Where do you want me to start?"
He smiled, nodding his head in the direction of his house. A tingle went up her spine and a smile traced on her lips when she felt his hand land on the small of her back.
**
They went back to his place and Brooke didn't hesitate to dump all her problems on him again. She seemed to do that a lot. He didn't mind really, in fact he kind of likes being that guy that could nod his head and smile then give out some good advice.
But soon she would be done and then there would be all those unsaid words between them.
"And then there's love." She blurted out, out of nowhere. His ears perked at the certain word, forgetting about everything she had said.
"What about love?"
"The fact that I'm not in it." She sighed. "I just want to have that feeling again, you know? That feeling you get when you see their face or hear their voice. I want that."
"It'll come." He assured.
"How do you know?"
He shrugged. "I'm a musician. I write about this stuff all the time."
"How are you so confident in yourself?" Brooke asked in disbelief, looking away to the pictures on the walls, letting herself believe it was the cocky Chris Keller talking.
"I just believe in myself that's all."
"Maybe that's what I need. Someone to believe in me."
He scoffed, earning a glare from Brooke. "I'm sure plenty of people believe in you." He thought for a second. "Nathan and Haley."
"They have Jamie to believe in."
"Peyton."
"This is the first time I've seen Peyton in over a year."
There was a pause as he thought of one more person.
"Lucas." He let the words leave his mouth, hating it more than anything. He could see the way it hurt her too and knew Lucas was the reason she was in the bar that night. "I believe in you, Brooke." He told her after a pause in the room.
It was her turn to scoff now and turn away for a bit. "It's true. Wait here." He got up from the couch and back into what Brooke suspected to be his bedroom. She heard him rumble through a few drawers and watched as he reappeared in the room with a book in hand. "Here." He handed it to her.
It was a magazine. Her magazine. Out of all the things she suspected him to show her this was the last. She opened her mouth to speak, but he beat her to it.
"This was your first magazine. I have other issues in the back." He pointed back to his room. "Let me tell you, people do not give the nicest looks when they see a guy buying a fashion magazine." He chuckled.
"But why?"
"Because when I first saw that magazine I could only think about how happy you were." He took the magazine in his hands and discarded it to the coffee table.
She shook her head. "I wasn't that happy." She's still not.
"I wanted to call you. I wanted to hear your voice after that night in the bar."
"Chris…"
"I know this is weird." He stopped her. "But I can't stop thinking about you. I know I've never been your most favorite person in the world, but I've changed. I just…I can't stop thinking about you."
Something came over Brooke that most would call stupid, but to her it was an act of impulse. Her lips crashed into his, cutting him off mid sentence. He didn't fight her on it though. Her lips were too soft and tasted too much like strawberries to push away.
Instead one hand went to her cheek inches away from that soft hair, while the other went to the small of her back.
"Say it again." She demanded with her lips along his jaw.
"What?"
"You know."
Her lips came back to his and between kisses he mumbled the words, "I believe in you."
Hearing the words again brought a sudden bolt of energy to spread across her body and before he knew it she was dragging him back to his bedroom. The zipper on her dress was soon unzipped and the buttons on his shirt had been ripped off and flown across the room. They were a tangled mess of naked limbs and bedsheets. Her nails dug deep into his back having him believe there would be scars by morning.
Nothing felt more intoxicating than having him inside of her. The need for more came over her and she screamed for it. With a grin on his face he happily obliged.
Brooke thought back to the last time she was this satisfied. It wasn't with Lucas, or Chase, or even that English teacher whose name slips her mind.
It was with Chris Keller. Senior year. Boy draft.
She remembered feeling horrible afterwards because she hurt Lucas, but it was the truth. No man could ever get Brooke Davis to scream out like Chris Keller.
**
She woke up in his bed the next morning with a smile on her face feeling completely at ease with herself. She looked over and saw him beside her pretty much worn out from the night before. It only took her a split second for the night before to come rushing back to her.
And then Brooke freaked out.
She had sex with Chris Keller…again. Of all the people to run into in a crises situation and she ran into him. Why him of all people? The most cock, obnoxious, inconsiderate jerk turned caring, sweet guy. With his tender lips and perfect blue eyes, with that hair she loved running her fingers through. Oh God, what was wrong with her? Was she falling for him? No she couldn't be, could she?
It didn't matter though; Brooke didn't stay long enough to find out.
With her dress back on and heels in hand, Brooke made the walk of shame back to Peyton's apartment. This night never happened. This night never happened. She had to tell herself over and over again that it didn't happened, he didn't exist anymore, and that her life wasn't as miserable as she thought.
He woke up about an hour later in an empty bed in an empty house. The smile on his face quickly faded. The thought that Brooke was in the kitchen cooking breakfast or in the shower never crossed his mind. He knew she left. He knew there was no note.
And he knew it would be a long time, if not never, until he saw Brooke Davis again.
**
Victoria sucks. It's officially.
Sometimes it amazes Brooke how she came out of the womb of the devil. How is it possible that her mother is a hateful bitch and Brooke is the exact opposite? OK maybe not exact.
In case you haven't noticed, Brooke's day has sucked. And all she wanted was some peace and quiet in her large penthouse.
She stepped into her bathroom and stripped out of her clothes. The hot water hit her skin like bullets. The day had taken too much out of her to clean herself. Right now she just wanted to be wet and wash away everything that was dragging her down.
But it wouldn't leave.
She was ignoring everyone from Peyton to Haley. The phone calls went unanswered and the emails got the delete button. She just didn't have it in her right now. She didn't want to act like nothing was wrong or even admit that anything was wrong.
The water turned cold while her fingers wrinkled and Brooke figured it was best to get out now. With a towel around her wet body and another twisted in her hair, Brooke walked out into her living room and saw the red blinking light across the room.
Her finger lingered over the button. Did she really want to do this?
"You have twenty-five new messages" Oh boy.
Beep.
"Hey Brooke, this is Millie. Um...Look Victoria's getting kind of mad and I really wish you would hurry up and get here. Please call me back as soon as you get this. Bye."
Message deleted. Next message.
"Hey Brooke, it's me Peyton. I was wondering if you were doing OK. You sort of left L.A. pretty quick. So please call me back - I really want to know how you're doing."
Message deleted. Next message.
"You know if you think this is any way to run a company you are so wrong. Get out of bed and get your ass to work now." How motherly.
Message deleted. Next message.
"Brooke...Brooke? It's me, Chris." She swore her heart stopped at the mention of his name. "I'd really wish you'd give me a call back. I meant what I said back in L.A. Brooke…look, please give me a call back or I'll call again later or…something. Bye."
His voice sounded sad and lonely. There was no desperation or anger to talk to her. She honestly believed that he meant what he said, but something in Brooke told her not to listen to her heart.
Message saved. Next message.
"Miss Da…"
All messages deleted.
After hearing Chris' message, no other message seemed important. Maybe they weren't or she was too wrapped up in this thing her and Chris have or had. Maybe there wasn't anything there or maybe there was. But the question was did she really want to find out?
**
"Brooke Penelope Davis!" Oh God that voice! You'd think after two years of hearing that voice more than you had your entire life you would be used to it by now. "Will you get your ass out of bed!?!"
She was hoping Victoria wouldn't find her lying in bed at ten in the morning. Who was she kidding? She was always in bed at this time. Somewhere in her mind she thought if she buried herself in the covers then Victoria wouldn't notice.
She found her.
Brooke sluggishly rose from her bed, rubbing the sleep from her eyes, as Victoria threw a random magazine at her. "You mind explaining that!"
The words on the page popped out.
Rock Star and Beauty Queen A Couple?
The picture was of them walking down the sidewalk in L.A. with his hand on her back. She doesn't even remember paparazzi being there on their walk home. They were good. Really good to get this shot. It was dark and down some streets you wouldn't want to take at night and they didn't attract attention to themselves, but there it was on the front page of some gossip magazine.
She didn't have time to moan and groan before Victoria went into full action on how to fix this.
It didn't matter really. Celebrities were matched up all the time when they weren't really together. There wasn't anything going on between Brooke and Chris. It was just a silly one night stand and it didn't mean anything. Just like with Lucas. There was nothing there and there never would be.
"Is it true?" Victoria asked after Brooke zoned out on her.
"Is what true?"
"This!" She pointed to the magazine.
Yes. No. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes.
"No."
"Good." She sneered. "We can't have you falling for bum musicians." The magazine was thrown back onto Brooke's bed and like magic Victoria vanished. The only indication that she really didn't vanish like Brooke wanted her to was her door slamming and echoing throughout the rooms.
She sunk back into her sheets, the breath she didn't know she had been holding escaped her lips. She could have told her mother the truth, but that would have been the same thing as jumping off a cliff. Lying was safe and easy. And it made it a lot easier for Brooke to convince herself that there was nothing between her and Chris Keller.
**
He walked into his apartment setting his guitar case by the door and his keys in the bowl next to it. His kitchen was a mess and he was never planning on cleaning. No one was coming to see him. There was no one to empress or entertain. It didn't matter.
The smell of eggrolls and fired rice filled the air and he smiled to himself, loving his aftershow tradition. Most rockstars went out partying after a show – he just went home. No one knew about it, not even his closets friends. It's like it was a big secret, only he wasn't keeping from the world. He just didn't like to share it with anyone but himself. Some food and a few reality shows was all he needed after a show. On occasion though he would stop and see how lonely it all seemed.
His phone beeped indicating he had a new message, letting him escape from this world his mind was slipping into. His eyes widen and he perked up when he saw that he had three missed calls. One of them from his manager and the other from his mom. But the last one was an out of state number. He knew that number. Brooke's number.
Quickly his fingers hit redial and he was practically jumping up and down as each ring went by.
"Hello."
"Brooke?" He questioned, knowing that wasn't the voice he wanted to hear.
"No, this is Victoria and who might this be?" She huffed into the phone.
"Chr, Chris Keller. Is Brooke there?"
"Oh so you're the one my daughter spent her night with while in L.A." His face turned white. Did her mother really know about that? Of course she knew, even if Brooke didn't tell her, it was still on the cover of almost every magazine. "I must say thank you for giving my daughter this great publicity." Sarcasm really did suit her well.
"Can I just talk to Brooke please? She…"
"No."
He sighed, trying to find the best possible way to continue being nice to her. "Miss Davis…"
"This whole calling 24/7 thing has to stop. My daughter's not interested. And in case you haven't noticed it's called Clothes Over Bros. So why don't you go write a sappy love song or whatever you rockstars do. You can do it – I believe in you." Her sarcastic and hateful voice hung up the phone before Chris could even manage another word.
I believe in you.
The phone slid from his fingers and crashed to the floor. He stood, shocked by this woman, as his brain tried to wrap around the fact that Brooke wasn't interested.
She surely showed it. Leading him on and then disappearing as fast as she could. But there was always the tone of her voice or her body language that had Chris second guessing whether or not it was true. Somewhere deep down he didn't believe it for a second.
I believe in you.
With his food forgotten, Chris walked back into his living room and took the guitar out of its case. With the piece of wood propped up on his knee, he began strumming away the strings of the guitar and hummed a melody that had been stuck in his head for days.
I believe in you.
He played until he had something. Anything. And then he played some more until it was one of the greatest things he had ever sung. It came to him so easily. Maybe he was still hyped up from the night of playing to his fans or maybe it was just sudden inspiration.
I believe in you.
Or maybe it was the fact she called him. Not the other way around. He knew it was her. He knew why she didn't leave a voice message. She was scared. Of what? He didn't know. He sang the song because it was the truth. It was about her and about him. It's about what she's doing to him. It was how he felt.
And it was the truth.
**
Oh and it's never fair
The way that me meet and you disappear
Oh and its oh so real
The way that we talk
The way that you feel
Oh and I want to scream, but I know the fault lies with me
Cause I believe in you, hey
I believe in you
I believe in you, ohhhh
The lyrics hit her sleeping form like a ton of bricks. Her eyes popped open and a sudden jolt of energy spiraled throughout her body. Propping up on her elbows, Brooke looked throughout the room for the noise that had interrupted her sleep.
"And that was Chris Keller with his new single "I Believe in You"." The radio host's voice said through the speakers of an old clock radio she forgot she even had, let alone plugged in. "Speaking of Chris Keller, he is here with us today in the studio and we're going to be talking about his upcoming album and what he's been up to since his last one. Chris, how you doing today?"
"I'm doing great. Thank you for having me." His rusty voice stopped her heart. It was really him.
"Tell me Chris, your new album is due any day now. When?"
"Well the album comes out nationally on Friday, but I'm giving an early release to those who show up at F.Y.E. on Avenue of the Americas in New York tomorrow night. I will also be there myself signing autographs and taking a few pictures with fans."
He was here. In New York and she didn't know about it. He didn't even call to tell her. In fact now that she thought about it, it had been weeks since his last phone call. She expected one after her moment of weakness where she broke down and called his number. She got his voicemail and was too chicken to leave one. Honestly she hoped he knew it was her number and call back. But he never did. He sort of just gave up.
"That's awesome; we'll have more on that later. But right now, Chris tell us where the inspiration for this album came from. It's been awhile since your last CD and then out of nowhere you come out with this amazing single "I Believe in You"."
She could hear him sigh into the microphone and she bet he was running his fingers through that hair she did that night with him. "A lot of things really. I put my heart and soul into this album and I wasn't ready to release anything until I was 100% sure that it was perfect. Certain songs are based off certain things. Moving to L.A., old loves, life itself."
"Would any of those loves happen to be Brooke Davis who you've recently been linked to?"
He chuckled at the question. He knew it was coming. "Brooke Davis and I have known each other for a long time. I wouldn't call us good friends and I wouldn't call us a couple." He spoke the truth. Brooke wasn't his friend and he wasn't hers. They didn't treat each other like friends, in fact he was the annoying guy that made her want to blow her brains out. But over these last few months things have changed between them. Nothing that would call them a couple though.
"Then what would you call her?" The host dug deeper.
"Brooke Davis believes in me and my music just like I believe in her and her fashion. She's what helped me make this album and she's part of the reason why I'm here today. Like I've said before, I've known her for a long time. I know special little things about her that no one else does and she does me. No one can put a label on what Brooke Davis and I are. Because there isn't one.
"Wow. Thank you for clearing that up for us, Chris. So is there a song about Brooke on the album?"
"I guess you'll just have to listen and choose for yourself." He chuckled.
"Very secretive. We have to take a short break, but we'll be back with Chris Keller and more of your favorite songs."
His voice faded out, leaving Brooke with the emptiness of her home. In that moment it felt too empty. Like there was supposed to be someone else here, preferably beside her in this bed. But there wasn't.
Did he just tell all of New York that he and Brooke are a couple or did he deny it? When she thought about it he really didn't answer. Was he denying it?
He couldn't be.
He wrote a song about her. She was sure it was about her. She just knew. There was still something between them. They didn't know what it was, but it was something.
Why was she questioning this? He didn't matter to her. He meant nothing. It was a stupid one night stand…again. Nothing more. Nothing less.
But he believed in her.
Now the next question was: does she go see him or not?
**
The sound of her heels clicking against the concrete is what kept Brooke from slipping into her own little world. It's what kept her from turning around and running home like a little girl. The sound drowned out every thought she could think.
"You can do this Brooke." She told herself quietly.
The last thing she remembers is hearing Chris' voice on the radio and now here she was walking down the sidewalk in the big apple. She assumes somewhere between then and now she fell asleep, showered, and eaten something before going to see Chris. Stop. She's about to see Chris. Chris Keller. The person she hadn't seen since their little rendezvous in his apartment months ago.
The sound of her heels was drowned out with her thoughts. They overtook her and caused her to breakout in a cold sweat. Her feet stopped, unable to control any other part of her body.
Maybe she couldn't do this.
No one could tell her if what she was doing was right or wrong. But when she looked up through that glass window and saw him sitting at a table with a line of his fans in front of him, she could see that maybe this was right. But your brain always second guesses you and it overtakes your heart.
He handed back the album he had just signed when his eyes traveled from the girl in front of him to the woman out the window. Her eyes attracted his and his face fell when she saw the frown she wore.
Oh crap! He saw her.
His eyes glued onto hers and the world just seemed to stop. His mind was bombarded with thoughts of only her. She came to him not the other way around.
She came just like he wanted her to. This whole event wasn't for his fans or publicity. He didn't fly out to New York to sign autographs all day and do interviews. He did this for her. He went on the radio in hopes that she was listening. This wasn't for him, or his album, or his fans – this was for her.
A picture was placed in front of him and an excited teenager squealed in his ear. His eyes broke away from hers for a split second. He handed back the picture and thanked her for coming out.
And then when he looked back to the window she was gone.
He saw her. He saw her. He saw her. He saw her. He locked eyes with her and a smile appeared on his lips. She panicked and thought she couldn't breathe. At his simple glance, the feeling in the pit of her stomach took over and she had to get out of there before her heart could fight back.
It was late when she got home that night. She had to stop and get a good buzz on the way – it just made things easier if she couldn't feel them. It might not have been the safest thing in the world to walk all the way home, pretty much drunk, but she couldn't bring herself to call anyone.
Who would she call in a crises situation? Everyone in Tree Hill like Nathan, Haley, and Lucas were out of the picture plus Peyton. That left Victoria, Millie, Rachel, and Chris. Victoria wouldn't dare bring herself out of bed to come get her drunken daughter. She wouldn't want to burden Millie with having to make personal calls with her boss. Her friend was in a worse situation than Brooke was in right now.
And then there was Chris.
The door slammed behind her while her purse flew across the room, not caring where it landed. She slumped into the couch letting out a huge sigh and trying to find someway to feel comfortable.
Today had been a long day. She was worn out mentally, not physically.
Chris wears her out. What was it with him that made her do these things? She was usually the one running towards guys, not away. She was the brave, confident one in the relationship. Men wanted her, women wanted to be her. But then Chris Keller popped back into her life and changed her whole life around.
He wasn't anything special. He rolled into Tree Hill and ruined lives. Then he left as everyone tried to pick up the pieces of his destruction. And then out of nowhere he reappeared back into her life. He was nothing to her.
But then she found herself dialing his number and before she could wonder how her fingers did this his voice soothed her ears.
"Hello…hello?" Her finger went for the disconnect button. "Brooke I know that's you."
"Chris." She finally said after a long pause.
He sighed. "I've realized today that I've waited too long. I've tried calling, listening, giving advice; and I thought after that night it would change things. But it didn't. I thought that if I gave you time to think then maybe you'd come when you're ready."
"Chris…" She tried, but couldn't find the words for the silence.
"I meant what I said in that song. I believe in you. You can do great things. And I can't stop thinking about you. But you just kept running away…and I kept chasing after you." He paused to see if she was still there. It almost killed him to her a sniffle from her. "Figure things out Brooke. You do your thing and I'll continue doing mine."
What did that mean? What was her 'thing' and what was his? Does she continue running while he chased after? Or is he done with it altogether? And all the while the same question still kept surfacing to shore. Does she have feelings for Chris?
"Chris…" She tried again to find her voice.
"Bye Brooke."
And then the line went dead.
**
She went to Tree Hill for Jamie's third birthday. It's hard to believe it's been three years since she's last been here. It's hard to go back to the place where you grew up and see how much you've grown up. She's not the small town girl anymore. In fact, she kind of never was. If there was one person that wasn't meant for this town it was Brooke Davis. But when she walked out that airport she felt at home. Nothing had changed…except the people.
Nathan was playing great at college. Haley was becoming a teacher. Peyton took a few days off work for the event. She also brought Julian. And as for Lucas. Well he showed up to the party with his fiancé Lindsey.
Apparently, they still haven't admitted their true feelings.
But everyone was paired off. Two by twos. She didn't know why, but lately she had been thinking about all the things she's been doing these past three years alone. Sleeping, eating, and traveling. They were all the things that were meant for two, but she was doing them alone. She wanted someone by her side. In Lucas' words 'when all her dreams come true'. It all seemed so simple. Find your soulmate, get married, have kids, and live your dream life.
It wasn't that easy.
There are an uneven number of people in the world. This means if everyone in the world began pairing off - Lucas and Lindsey, Nathan and Haley, Julian and Peyton – there would be that one person that had nobody. They would be alone with no one to turn to. What if that was Brooke?
This was going to be a long day.
"Hey." The deep voice pulled her from her thoughts.
"Hey." She replied to the blonde haired blue eyed face.
"How are you?" He asked trying to get pass the awkward stage. She didn't know why he was doing this. He owed her nothing. She to him.
"Fine." She nodded. "How's your book?" Small talk wasn't her forte. She just didn't want to walk away like a jerk.
"Good." He copied her early movement. "It's almost done. Lindsey's has been really great with everything."
"She seems great, Luke. I hope she makes you happy." She gently placed her hand on his arm.
"She does. You'd really like her Brooke."
"Yeah." They were the only words she could find that didn't sound hateful. No, Brooke wouldn't like her. Because she wasn't Peyton. She wasn't the one for him. She wasn't right. This wasn't right. He needed to be with Peyton, not Lindsey, not Brooke. Brooke? Why did she include herself in that scenario? Oh God, she's doing it again. Damn Lucas and taking her heart and making her think these thoughts.
He always did this to her.
"Brooke about that night…" He finally spitted out.
"It never happened." She finished for him.
"It was a mistake." He whispered. "Everything about it."
Did that mean what she told was a mistake too? That what she said wasn't true. That Peyton wasn't the one for him.
Why does she care anymore? She's so wrapped up in her friend's love stories that she can't even focus on her own anymore. Why does she care that her friends are too stupid to realize what's right in front of them? The thing is she doesn't care. Not anymore.
"Lindsey's the one." He said out loud.
She walked away at that moment, not caring if she was being a jerk or not. She couldn't take hearing about Lindsey and how great she was. She's not the one.
She managed to put on a happy face for the rest of the party. Jamie didn't need everyone to be worried about her instead of him. It was his day. So she played happy. She talked to Peyton and kept her distance from Lucas and Lindsey. She and Nathan talked about how he was doing in school, but mostly basketball. Apparently, he's doing great and is already being looked at by the NBA even though he's only a junior.
It still amazed her how much she's missed. Jamie was a genius. But she wasn't there for his first words or the first time he made a basket in his 4-foot tall goal. She was his godmother and yet she wasn't there to look after him. She didn't know that Karen and Lily left to be with Andy and the thought of where Deb had ran off to even cross her mind.
It's all changed.
But isn't that what they wanted after high school?
"Hey, there you are. I've been looking for you." Haley said as she walked into the kitchen to refill some glasses. Brooke had hidden away in the kitchen just to get away from screaming kids and annoying questions.
"I've been here." She tried to fake a smile.
"You OK?"
"Yeah."
"Brooke." She kinked her brow, knowing something was wrong. "This is the first time I've seen you in…forever and you just seem different. You're not the same Brooke anymore. Now come on, I'm all ears." She took a seat at the stool beside her, propping her elbows up on the counter. "Tell me about New York, the company, your love life."
New York was busy. Her company was becoming less and less hers everyday and was practically being taken over by Victoria. And as for her love life…
"I slept with Chris." She blurted out.
The drink Haley had been swallowing almost splattered out her mouth. "Brooke we know that. Senior year, remember? Old news."
"No." She shook her head. "I mean a few months ago."
Haley looked to Brooke in disbelief and confusion. "So the magazines…?"
"Were true. Victoria just said they weren't."
"But…how? When?"
"I saw him in a bar one night about a year ago and he was so sweet. And…he's changed Haley. Like really changed. Then one night in L.A. we met up again and things just took a turn."
Haley could only nod. Speechless as to what to say. Chris changing? It didn't seem possible really. "Do you…" She trailed trying to pick her words carefully, "have feelings for Chris?"
"I don't know." She sighed. "He got tired of me running away. So he told me to do my thing while he does his. And I don't' know what to do."
"Look out that window." She demanded. Brooke gave her a look and Haley just nodded to the window. There outside was Peyton and Lucas stealing awkward glances to each other. They each seemed confused with the other and unaware of what the future behold. Their beloved others stood beside them with their hands clasped to the other, not noticing the glances being thrown between Lucas and Peyton.
"That's what happens when you don't admit your true feelings. All you'll have is those glances across the room."
Brooke looked back to Haley. "So what should I do? Do you think I have feelings for Chris?"
A small laugh escaped her lips. "I don't know Brooke. You tell me."
"You want me to go back to New York, don't you?"
"If you think it's the right thing to do."
It only took her a second to even considerate it. This was one battle she wasn't going to let the feeling in the pit of her stomach win or have her brain second guess. This was one her heart wanted to win, needed to win.
She was going back to New York.
**
He was still here. In New York, not in L.A. And of all the places to be he was here. He could have gone home weeks ago, but hadn't. Some are going to call this fate, some a coincidence, some love. The old Brooke would call this two acquaintances meeting up in a bar. The new Brooke just called it the moment of truth.
A year ago she sat in this bar and could only scow at Chris Keller. Now she went unnoticed by him trying to decide how far her life had come and what it meant in this moment.
Does she continue running and doing her 'thing'? Or the opposite?
She watched as he sipped from his beer and watched as the couples on the dance floor danced. It kind of made her happy that she didn't walk in here to see him dancing with one of these whores or worse trying to take one home.
But that was the old him.
Now he sat and watched. I guess this was his 'thing' that he was talking about. Whatever this was, he was here. Waiting for her to show up out of nowhere. And there she was across the room waiting for her feet to guide her over there.
She thought about downing the rest of her drink before going to confront him. But then that would give her an excuse later and say she wasn't in the right state of mind. So she swallowed the lump in her throat and grabbed her purse.
And did everything in her power not to run to him.
The weight of her arm became heavier as she lifted and pressed a finger to his shoulder. "Hi." She managed out even before he turned around to see her.
He couldn't believe it. She came to him.
"Hi." He said in utter shock. "What are you doing here?"
She shrugged not having an answer. "What are you doing here?"
He shrugged too. "I just wanted a drink." He simply answered.
"I just wanted to stop running."
He stood up from his stool and placed a hand on her arm. Looking down into her hazel eyes as they watered he asked, "You sure?"
The nod he received was a good enough answer to make the grin appear on his face. She smiled back at him placing her hand over his. "I want something more than those awkward glances across the room."
He didn't know what that meant or how it fitted into their situation, but he didn't care. She was with him. She wasn't running away from him. She was running to him and into his arms. This was the start of something new, something…magical. They were it. This was it.
He wasn't Lucas or some rich business guy. He was just a musician trying to make it in this business. He had changed in these last four years. He wasn't cocky or arrogant. And she wasn't as naïve anymore. She figured out that the world didn't revolve around her and is now trying to figure it out for what it truly is. Maybe everyone was going to pair off into twos, but at least she and Chris could be with each other now.
"What do we do now?" She asked over the loud music. The question was meant for what they do with this relationship. Does she go to L.A. with him? Does he move back to New York for her? Do they try the awful and heart wrenching long distance? She had done enough running away maybe it was time she follow him. She needed a straight answer on what this was, but it didn't really matter.
He was here now.
He knew she wanted an answer. A real one. But he didn't have one. This was all too soon to give one. Of course he thought about it. He just figured he'd move back to New York and be with her. Honestly he didn't mind chasing after her. He just wanted her to know that there was something between them.
"Well first I'm going to do this…" He leaned down and crashed his lips onto hers. She didn't dare pull away, but instead invited his tongue in. His hand went to the spot on her back that was only reserved for his hand only while the other let the strands of her hair run over his fingers. She tried to move as closer to him as she could only to be pulled back when they both needed air.
"And now I'm going to walk you home." He smiled. "Cause its dark out and it's a bad neighborhood." He told her only to have a laugh escape her lips.
"And this time you're staying over."
"Only if you'll be there when I wake up in the morning." He said grabbing hold of her hand and walking out onto the sidewalk in the starry night.
She squeezed his hand tighter, loving that feeling in the pit of her stomach. "Deal."
And the next morning when he woke up she was there. And they both knew she always would be.
