I really love this pairing and it's time I started posting more of it. Fusan, I mean, and I like Bonfire too (largely owing to my friends like Illeity and Adventuretitan on tumblr), so their emphasis on crackships has inspired me to put some love for Finn/Susan Strong!
Disclaimer: I don't own Adventure Time.
Susan Strong yawned, bored out of her mind. "Susan is bored!" she complained. "And also talking in surface talky-way instead of hyooman talky-way even though Susan speaks that talky-way real good. ...Susan feels kinda not-smart now."
She extended her legs into the water, breaking the surface (and concussing a lub-glub which had been plotting for weeks to kill them all, so it all turned out pretty well for everyone) and giggled at how nice the water felt. She wiggled her toes and splashed the water, her proportionately tiny palms hitting the water with enough force to crack a table into pieces. The splashes looked good.
Bubbles came up from the water, and something white and furry and topped with bear-ears poked out through the water. Susan pulled her legs back with a childish shriek. "BEAR-SHARKS!" she cried. "Susan always knew they would come for her! Hyoomans say, Susan was crazy to be afraid of a thing that doesn't be there! But who is crazy now, hah!?"
The water burst; Finn the human, small and adorable and only a few years younger than Susan (for Susan was, in spite of her size and... ample womanliness, not much more than a teenager), sputtering with water. "The hyoomans were right, I shouldn't have drunk the water."
Susan's mouth opened; it turned into a smile, and then she thought it looked overeager so she straightened herself and sat up, trying to look prim. She glanced down, turned extremely red, and adjusted the shaggy furs she wore as a minidress for modesty. (She actually wore a pair of shorts from the same furs, but it was the thought that counted. Susan like to think of herself as a Good Girl, whatever that meant.)
"What you doing here, Finn?" Susan asked, trying not to look too excited. Her earlier dreams of grabbing Finn, taking him home and appointing him her husband-buddy came wonderfully to mind.
"Well, my and my ex-girlfriend, Flame Princess-"
"Girlfriend?" Susan said, her expression turning downcast and hurt. Her dreams of Finn being her cutie love-buddy shattered.
"Ex-girlfriend," Finn emphasized. "We didn't, y'know, fight or anything this time, we just decided it wasn't working out love-wise. So I introduced her properly to my good friend Princess Bubblegum from the Candy Kingdom - your remember her, you wanted to eat her kingdom?"
"Yep," Susan said, without any apparent sign of realizing that he might still be annoyed by that.
"...Right. Anyway, I set them up together, and they started going out! And they're adorable!" Finn sighed happily, blushing a little bit, in that good way of a shipper who saw his ship become canon. "So, uh, now I'm here."
"...Why?" Susan said, her dreams of Finn becoming her love-buddy cautiously coming back together.
"'Cause I like you," Finn said, suddenly giving her a ferocious hug. His arms didn't even make it a third across her bicep, but his strength was incredible; Susan squealed with joy, and gathered him up into her arms, and Finn disappeared against all that bulk over him.
"...Wanna be my girlfriend?" Finn asked.
"YES," Susan said extremely loudly.
"Neato! Wow, that was a lot easier than Jake said it would be."
Across the cavern of Beautopia, Princess Bubblegum watched all this with a pair of binoculars. She put them down, rubbed her hands together and giggled like a shipper who had seen her ship become canon. "Yes, yes! Everyone is happy! Except Marceline, but she's not into romance right now, so it's okay."
"You... wanted Finn to end up with that giant human girl?" Flame Princess said.
"Yep!"
Flame Princess considered for many long moments. "I am compelled to ask why."
"Because they mesh very well," Bubblegum began. "They have similar personalities and emotional maturity, I think they're reasonably close in age... and we mustn't discount being the same species probably, as that is an important consideration when you're the last of a thing." She paused. "And, I will admit, I think they make a fine couple. A tiny boy and a giant girl; that is freaking adorable, okay?"
"...If you say so," Flame Princess said dubiously.
"And more importantly," Bubblegum finished, "They like each other a lot and they get along well. That's fine romance well enough."
"Ah," Flame Princess said. "I wish I could know someone like that so easily..."
"You never know your luck," Bubblegum said, and pattered Flame Princess on the back. Slowly, her hand started sliding down, down to the considerable largeness below...
"Well, Finn's happy," Flame Princess said, suddenly business-like, and perhaps unaware of Bubblegum's sexual tension, perhaps fully aware and amusing herself by pretending she didn't. Either way, Bubblegum whined with frustration "Can we go home? All this water is freaking me out, mang."
"Ugh, geez, fine. Some people have no sense of I HAVE NEEDS OKAY?"
"What?"
"Nothin'."
