A/N: I really hope you like it. English is not my native language. I hope I didn't make too many mistakes. No flames please it's my first Anime fanfic that I published here.
I don't own Akagami no Shirayuki-hime and it's lovely characters if I did it were shonen-ai :D
It was raining for days now in Clarines. Obi started to get bored because he couldn't do anything and his master didn't have any errands for him to take care of.
The brunette walked aimlessly through the castle and pestered anyone who came across his way. But his fun slowly started to wane. He sighed and began to head for Zen's office. ''Maybe master needs my help with something now. Or he could just do a training fight with me for a change'', Obi thought.
When he knocked on the door there was no response. So he opened it and peeked inside. Zen was once again lying asleep on a pile of papers.
Obi walked into the room and considered waking Zen up because the position he was in looked like it would probably make his neck stiff. But when Obi came even closer and was about to shout his master's name, he noticed the bags under Zen's eyes and how restlessly he seemed to be in his sleep.''I better let him sleep. He really looks like he needs it and if he were to wake up he would just overwork himself again'', Obi said quietly to himself. Obi pondered about whether he should leave Zen be or bring him to his bedroom. He then decided to pick his master carefully up and walked to Zen's room. In his sleep Zen snuggled closer into Obi's touch. The brunette suddenly felt his heart beating very quickly and he blushed lightly. ''Pull yourself together stupid Obi'', he scolded himself grimly.
Obi walked faster and opened the door to Zen's room. He actually wasn't that often in his room so after placing Zen slowly on his bed Obi started to explore his master's room. Obi knew that he shouldn't just invade Zen's privacy like that but he couldn't help it. It was in his nature to be curious. Obi spotted something that looked like a diary on Zen's shelf. He asked himself what Zen might has written down there. Deep inside of him was also a tiny spark of hope glowing.''Maybe master wrote something about me in there? I wonder how he feels about me.'' Obi shook his head but took the diary anyway because his curiosity won. When Obi started to open it Zen's sleepy voice suddenly came up:'' Why am I room and what are you doing here Obi?''
In a flash Obi had laid the dairy back to where it belonged and turned to his master. '' Well I found you asleep at your desk and that didn't look very comfortable so I brought you here. I hope you don't mind it master?'', Obi said quickly. Zen already went to the direction of the door.'' Nah it's fine but I really need to continue my work so please wake me up immediately next time'', Zen said. Obi wanted to object but he didn't know what to say to his stubborn master. He just nodded in defeat and followed his master out of the room. Without another word they walked off into different directions.
The next day the sun finally came out. Obi wanted to go outside but he first stopped by at Zen's office because he thought it might be a good idea to take his master with him. He certainly could need a break. He didn't understand why Zen is even working so much. ''Maaaaaaaaaaaaster'', Obi shouted in high spirits. ''What is it Obi?'', Zen asked rather absently. ''The weather finally cleared so I thought we could take a walk outside'', Obi answered. ''And your work can wait you need some free time after all these days of work'', Obi added when he saw that Zen wanted to protest. Zen surrendered reluctantly and stood up. But then he stumbled and nearly fell if it wasn't for Obi who caught him.'' Are you all right master?'', Obi asked worriedly. Zen quickly pulled away and tried to remain his composure. '' Yeah, I guess I just sat too long and my legs fell asleep that's why it's actually a good idea to go outside'', Zen responded. Obi didn't press the matter further and just dragged his master outside. ''How about we take the horses?'', Zen suggested. Obi shrugged don't minding it.
They went to the stable and only spotted one horse.'' Well, we could ride it together'', Obi said trying not to sound serious about it. In truth the thought actually made him happy.''Hell no, stop joking! Let's take a walk to the forest'', Zen declined. Obi expected this rejection bu he couldn't help the little stinging pang of hurt that shoot through his heart. '' Of course not haha'', Obi murmured. ''Yeah let's go'' Instead of walking besides him Zen insisted to be a few steps ahead of Obi. This was not at all how Obi had planned this.
His mood got worse when Zen just didn't seem to search a conversation. Obi decided to start one instead: ''So why are you having so much work to do lately?'' ''Eto...It just happens to be a busy week. Because of all the rain a lot of problems have emerged'', Zen replied after a few seconds.
''But can't we help you? You are working way too much lately master. Everyone is worried'', Obi said. ''There is nothing to worry about. I'm perfectly fine!'', Zen said annoyed. He stopped walking and turned around.
Obi almost bumped into him. Zen glared at the ground:''Why have you been pestering me all week? It's not like I'm a little child. I can take care of myself.'' Obi took a step back because he found himself way too close to Zen. '' No offence but you can't really take care of yourself. And it's out of concern like I said.'' Obi shrugged it off and walked past Zen, not bothering to check if he was following him. To his surprise Zen was still with him when they reached the forest.
They continued walking with an awkward silence between them. Obi started to regret taking his master with him. It only made things worse and his heart wouldn't stop pounding faster whenever Zen took a few steps closer just to walk further away again. Obi could link this to their relationship. Whenever Obi felt like Zen was in his reach he would slip away from his grasp. He could never be really close to him. Obi felt like going back to the castle. Just when he wanted to propose his idea of returning, a group of bandits came out of nowhere.
Zen and Obi prepared themselves for a fight. They weren't particularly strong opponents but they highly outnumbered the two boys. Zen drew his sword and started to fight them off. Obi attacked everyone who wanted to go for Zen. But because of the large number Obi got a few metres separated from Zen. All of a sudden Obi noticed how his master lost focus. The moment Zen started to feel dizzy because of his lack of sleep the bandits used his state to their advantage. Obi leaped forwards but he didn't manage to get them in time.
One of the bandits rammed his dagger into Zen's abdomen.'' BASTARDS!'' Obi was enraged and a sudden furry blinded him. He saw red and started to kill the bandits. He broke their necks and threw his Kunai's at every moving target. He made sure to leave nobody alive. Then he rushed to Zen's side and lifted him carefully up.'' Master can you hear me? Hang in there I'm gonna bring you home'', Obi said with a shaking voice. A puddle of blood was forming on the ground. Zen clung to Obi. ''It's not that bad...really. I must apologize for this O..b..i'', Zen smiled weakly. Then his bloody and trembling hands lost their grip and he fell unconscious.
Obi was frightened and ran as fast as he could back to the castle. He rushed to the infirmary already followed by a lot of servants. Annoyed at all the people Obi slammed the door behind him shut and laid Zen on a bed.''Garak-san come here fast the prince needs your medical treatment.'' She rushed in and examined Zen's wound.'' Oh my goodness what happened to him?'' Garak asked shocked.''We were just taking a walk and then we got attacked by some lousy bandits. It was my duty to protect master. I failed him'', Obi sounded devastated.'' The wound seems deep but nothing vital is damaged. I can treat him. If he survives the night he will be out of danger. And don't blame yourself. This happened because it was beyond your power to control'', Garak tried to soothe Obi.'' Now please leave. You need to rest too after all this fighting.'' Obi wanted to stay so badly but he knew that he should let her take care of it right now and come back later. So Obi went outside to his own room.
Later this night Obi sneaked back to the infirmary and watched Zen. For once he looked peaceful in his sleep.'' Yes he's only sleeping and tomorrow he'll wake up. Everything's okay'', Obi thought. Suddenly Zen started to move around wildly and hyperventilated. Obi rushed to his side and calmed him down. After that Zen's breathing almost became too shallow and his wound had reopened. Obi quickly changed the bandages and after he was done and was just about to pull away Zen's hand grabbed his wrist.'' Don't leave me'', Zen mumbled with despair in his voice but then he was asleep again. Obi asked himself why Zen sounded so desperate.'' Don't worry I never thought about leaving you'', Obi smiled. He watched over Zen until he fell asleep himself.
The next morning Obi was glad that he woke up first. It would've been pretty awkward if Zen had seen that Obi feel asleep on the bed with his fingers intertwined with Zen's. Obi blushed and quickly pulled away. The sudden movement woke Zen up.'' Huh where am I?'', Zen asked confused. ''After you got stabbed I hurried home and brought you to the infirmary. I'm so sorry master I shouldn't have let this happen. I was supposed to protect you yet I couldn't do a thing'', Obi explained. Zen tried to sit up but groaned in pain.''What do you think you're doing? Lay back down you're not in the condition to move yet!'', Obi said and pushed Zen gently back down. ''Don't apologize again Obi. I don't want to hear it. You are not at fault understood? I made choices on my own and paid the price for it. And now let me move I need to go back to work'', Zen said.
''Are you out of your mind? You can't stand up yet. You have to rest!'', Obi started to get angry. '' I can't afford to slack off. Having nothing to do makes me feel useless'', Zen mumbled. Obi barely heard him.'' Hey now where is this coming from?'' Obi asked surprised. Before Zen could reply reply a very upset Mitsuhide stormed into the room:'' What were you thinking Zen? Don't wander around when it's not safe outside. You must have known very well that the numbers of criminal activities have increased over the last week. But more importantly how are you feeling?'' Zen laid a hand over his eyes in disbelief.''Why must I deal with this now?'', he asked himself quietly. ''I'm sorry Mitsuhide. I just thought it would be a good idea to go outside. I thought I could handle an attack if necessary. My wound isn't that bad either'', Zen replied.
''Well you thought wrong Zen. That's disappointing you should know better. And to drag Obi with in to your mess. You better heal up fast now you have responsibilities'', Mitsuhide lectured him. But it wasn't-'', Obi tried to say that it was his fault for making Zen come with him but the latter interrupted him. ''I understand. It was indeed very stupid of me to make such a miscalculated decision. It won't happen again'', Zen assured Mitsuhide. ''Alright, I will talk with Kiki and your brother Zen'', Mitsuhide said and left the room. Zen turned around so that he didn't face Obi. ''Hey Zen. What was that about? Why did you lie?'', Obi asked in confusion. ''Would you mind leaving me alone?'', Zen ignored Obi's questions. Obi wanted to talk to Zen but he felt like he should leave it be for now. Dejected Obi left the room. He didn't see the tears that started to roll down Zen's cheeks…
The next time Obi walked into the room he found Zen asleep. He noticed the diary lying loosely in Zen's hand. Obi wondered how he got it there and if he wrote something important into which couldn't have waited until he was healed. Again Obi felt curious and he carefully took the diary. He was so shocked and also glad that he could read what Zen was always hiding behind his mask.
Yesterday I packed myself with work again so that I could forget about him and about all these bad thoughts. I can't be near him so work is the only thing that gives me an excuse to stay away. But actually I want him to worry about me. Am I being selfish? He isn't exactly helping it...he makes it hard to forget him. I've always wondered if god hates me. The thoughts just won't go away no matter how hard I try. With how things are at the castle it's hard to go on. It's just how it always has been. I was never good enough for anything. I just had all these responsibilities and I had to full fill them no matter what. Nobody cared about my accomplishments. I'm always taken for granted. I've always only heard you have to this and that because you are a prince. I honestly wish I weren't. Maybe my life would have been better. I still have these unpleasant thoughts of dying. I just can't let it go. It's like a temptation that calls out to me and whispers that my suffering can end this way. It's not like there will be anyone who would actually mourn over my death. But yet there is one light in my life that keeps me fro turning to the darkness. I'm standing between this light and the darkness. But I will never be able to reach the light. Because I have to stay away. If I told him how I feel about him he might be disgusted and turn away from me. He might leave me too. My important light which I have to watch from a distance would be gone. I'm one step away from killing myself. I almost died yesterday but he saved me so does that mean I'm not destined to die yet? My light..my Obi...I just wish the best for my dear loved ones who doesn't seem to love me back. I wonder how much longer I can take this-
Obi couldn't take it anymore. Tears were dropping onto Zen's diary. Obi was in pain too. He never would've thought that his always so cheerful and composed master actually felt so broken inside. Obi felt guilty for not paying enough attention. But he was determined to pull Zen into the light. As he watched Zen's sleeping form he noticed the faint traces of tears. ''Yes I definitely have to pay closer attention to him from now on'', Obi thought. He stroked affectionately through Zen's hair.
''Wake up master'', Obi said gently. When Zen slowly came to he was confused. ''What are you doing?'', Zen asked. ''Just touching your hair. It's really soft. I like it'', Obi smiled. Zen tried to hide his blush but failed. Obi stopped and his expression turned into a serious one. ''I'm not gonna lie to you master. I've read your diary. Gomenasai'', Obi told him. Zen suddenly looked horrified. ''W-why did you do that? Did you read…?'', Zen stuttered. ''I've read all about how you feel'', Obi confirmed.
Zen suddenly jumped up and tried to run away but he fell down. The wound was too fresh to be walking around yet alone to do fast movements.'' Master!'' Obi wanted to lift him up but Zen refused his help. ''Please don't come near me. I-I can't t-take it. You probably hate me now anyway. Y-you can leave when you feel too disgusted'', Zen stared to sob. ''You don't understand anything!'', Obi got frustrated. He kneeled down and hugged Zen. This took the prince by surprise but he just couldn't take it anymore and let himself go. He hold onto Obi as tightly as he could and cried his heart out.
''Shh stop crying. Everything's gonna be all right. I want to stay by your side….I..love you..Zen'', Obi whispered. ''S-stop you're you pitying me. You don't have to act like this for my sake'', Zen sobbed. ''Why are you so stubborn? I love you since you became my master. I was always scared of rejection but if I had known how much you suffered, I would've just confessed earlier. I care about you so much. I would die for you! Gomenasai, master. You must have felt so much pain in these past few months'', Obi lowered his head.
A few minutes of silence only filled with Zen's sobs passed. After Zen calmed down enough he let Obi go but stayed close to him. Then he hesitantly placed his hands on Obi's cheeks and lifted his head up. Glassy blue eyes stared into regretful amber one's. ''It's not your fault. I was a coward too. But prove that you mean what you said'', Zen said softly. He closed their distance and gently brushed his lips against Obi's. Obi kissed him back with all the love and passion he had for Zen and he hoped his feelings reached his beloved master. ''I love you so much Obi'', Zen murmured and then he fell asleep in Obi's arms from exhaustion. Obi felt like he could stay forever like this. The most important person in his life in his arms. They finally managed to close their distance. Obi never felt so happy before. After all his biggest wish finally came true and Zen finally looked happy too.
