Okay, I had this idea, but I'm not really sure if it's any good or not. So, tell me what you think: Is it worth continuing? I had a lot planned out, which includes, but is not limited to, the following words/phrases: cheese factory, Emmett in a Dorothy costume, a dog food factory, Miley Cyrus and a restraining order (to our dear friend Emmett), a lawsuit against the Canadian bacon companies, a modern-day asylum, a ski lift, a dangerous tree, and, hmm…yes, a possible match with a water snake (and our dear friend Emmett, once again.)
Soo, tell me what you think! Grazie!!!! J
Disclaimer: I only own Twilight in my lovely delusions of grandeur. How sad.
Bella POV
I pulled on my sneakers. "Okay, I'm ready," I called.
Edward appeared next to me. "Let's go. Alice has something very important to tell us."
But I saw that the corners of his lips were twitching as he tried not to smile.
"You already know, don't you?" I demanded.
Instead of answering, he just steered me to his Volvo. I took that as a yes.
I spent the ride in silence, contemplating what it was Alice had to tell us.
Edward kept glancing over at me, seeming amused, somehow.
"Are you mad?" he asked, staring at me for what seemed like the twelfth time, with the same laughing expression on his face.
I considered telling him to watch the road, and then decided that there was no point. He wouldn't crash. He never had, probably never would.
I realized he was still waiting for my answer. "Sort of," I managed. I was now too lost in his eyes, back to their golden color, thanks to a late night hunting trip, to form a fully coherent response.
As soon as we pulled into the Cullens' driveway, Alice came out and whisked us all into the living room.
"Alright, everyone," she said, as she stood in the middle of the living room with her hands on her hips, surveying her audience. "I have news."
"No kidding," Emmett muttered.
Alice narrowed her eyes. "What was that, Emmett McCarty Cullen?"
Emmett gulped. "Nothing."
Geez. For someone so small, Alice sure was good at scaring people, even huge, muscular giants.
"We're going on a road trip!" she squealed, clapping her hands. We just stared. To be honest, I think our reaction was a bit disappointing to her. We all just stared, dumbfounded.
"Aren't you excited?" she asked, her lower lip beginning to tremble. Jasper shot a look at us, and suddenly I was ecstatic.
"YES! THIS IS WONDERFUL!!! O-M-G!! LET'S GO SHOPPING ALICE!" I began hopping up and down. "I. LIKE. SOCKS. BWAHAHAHAHAHAAA! HAIL THE WOMB OF OUR FATHER WHO ART WITH A PINEAPPLE COVERED HAM CAKE!"
"Okay, Jazzy, cut it out, this is scary," Alice said, backing away a few paces.
A wave of calm came toward me and I sat next to Edward, back to normal.
"Oh gosh, did I just say that I wanted to go shopping?" I asked in horror.
"That, and you also said 'Hail the womb of our father who art with a pineapple covered ham cake," Emmett told me, grinning.
I moaned and buried my face in my hands. "I hate you, Jasper," I said in a muffled tone.
"There's no time to badmouth my husband! You said it yourself, Bella. We have to go shopping!"
The drive to the mall was a bit…odd, to say in the very least. Jasper, for unknown reasons, kept sending random waves of energy at me.
"I LIKE MASHED POTATOES. Why are you doing this? MARY HAD A LITTLE LAMB WHO DRANK OUT OF THE TOILET. Jasper, stop it! I WISH I WAS AN OSCAR MEYER WEINER. Seriously, it's not funny anymore! FRED FLINSTONE DRIVES A MOTOR BOAT." This was just a snippet of what I had been saying throughout the ride. At last, we arrived at the mall, Emmett roaring with laughter, and Rosalie looking as though she would like nothing more than to snap my neck.
All I wanted was to get in and out of the mall as soon as possible. But with Alice, I could tell it wouldn't happen.
I ran over a few possibilities in my mind, and I was so absorbed in my thoughts, that I didn't even notice the small soda spill on the floor that I slipped in.
"Whoa!" Not one, but two pairs of arms caught me. A warm, soft, unfamiliar pair, and a cold, hard, familiar pair. I looked up into two faces: Edward, my love, and Mike Newton, my…well, my fellow human being.
"Hey, Bella!" Mike greeted me cheerfully. Unusually cheerfully. This puzzled me for a moment, until I saw who he was with; Jessica stood behind him, carrying a small bag and beaming.
"Hey, Mike!" I said with as much enthusiasm as I could muster, which apparently wasn't a lot, because I heard Emmett snort behind me.
"What are you doing here?" he asked.
Now it was my turn to snort.
"Gee, I don't know, Mike, what are we doing in a mall?" Rosalie asked sarcastically, her obvious dislike for Mike displayed on her perfect face.
Edward muttered something too low for me to make out, but it sounded somewhat like, "Behave yourself."
"Hi Mike! Nice to see you! Well, lots of shopping, so little time, see you!" Alice grabbed my arm and dragged me away, still bouncing, with the others trailing behind us.
"I love you, Alice! Thank you my most wonderful, awesome, greatest, bestest best friend!"
"Silly Bella, bestest isn't a word!" Alice corrected me.
"Did I just use it as a word?" I asked innocently.
"Yes," she admitted.
"Then it's a word now!" I said, grinning.
Suddenly, Alice stopped jumping, her face serious again.
"Okay, enough fooling around. It's time to go shopping!"
I groaned in exasperation as my overly-perky best friend bounded ahead of us, giving me no choice but to face my terror.
Ahh, so dramatic, isn't she?
Ahh, my bestie Mike. I hate him. He's mad annoying!!!
OMC, so hope ya like it!!
Oh, the thing about "Mary had a little lamb who drank out of the toilet", one of my friends actually said this. We were doing a spontaneous for OM and we had to finish the sentence "Mary had a little lamb who…" and this was one and I was cracking up!!!
Peace, Luv, Twilight!
PS. Review, or face the wrath of my evil pink pony minions!! BWAHAHAHAHAHA!!
(My invisible purple monkey Muffins controls them very well.)
