Title: What's on the Menu
Author: tommygirl828 (at) gmail (dot) com
A/N: also posted at my livejournal and eventually my website. Ficlet for a friend - heavy on banter, light on plot. Feedback always appreciated!
"Why do you always do that?" Casey asked, forcing a glare across the table to where Dan continued to peruse the menu…again.
"Do what?"
"Stare at the dessert menu like you don't already know what you're going to get."
Dan lifted his eyes from the menu and said, "Because I don't know what I'm going to get. I like to mull these things over."
"HA."
Dan arched an eyebrow. "That was out loud, you know."
"Yes, and I'll do it again. HA. You mull nothing over. You are a non-muller if I ever saw one."
"That's not a word."
"My point is that you get the same dessert every single time we come here."
"I'm perusing the menu, Casey. I could change my mind. I could stumble upon a picture of a cheesecake and think, 'that's quite delectable' and order that instead."
"Danny, we've been coming here for years, and you've never changed your mind."
"I would think you be more understanding of my routine by now, Casey."
"But you…" Casey took a deep breath. He reminded himself of all the reasons why he actually loved Dan and that kept him from jumping out of his seat and beating Dan senseless. Casey leaned back in his chair and said, "No one understands your routine because it doesn't make sense."
"Says you."
"Says the definition of 'sense'."
"I simply like to see what my options are. Is that a crime?"
"When you order the same thing every single time…it should be."
"How can you be sure—"
"—Every. Single. Time."
Dan dropped the menu and folded his arms on the table. He shot Casey a look and then said, "So what am I getting, Kreskin?"
"You'll peruse the menu, make some comment about how no one actually likes Bananas Foster, and then order a cup of rice pudding."
"Well, I'm pretty sure no one does like Bananas Foster. It's disgusting."
"Dan…"
"And why did you say 'rice pudding' like that?"
"Like what?"
"Like you hated it with every fiber of your being."
"Are we really arguing about how I said rice pudding?"
"I'm just curious why you have such animosity for a harmless dessert, Casey. Did some bully in the school cafeteria force you to eat rice pudding off his shoes? Did it haunt your nightmares as a child?"
"We're not having this conversation. Order your dessert so we can get out of here."
Danny smirked and said, "I could order the rice pudding to go and show you the many ways that it's not so bad."
"You're not smearing rice pudding all over me, Danny."
"You always said you wanted a spiced up sex life."
"But it's rice. In pudding."
"Fine. You have a crazy dislike of rice pudding. It's now noted. How about you let me eat my rice pudding in peace?"
"So you were just being a tease a few seconds ago?"
Danny shrugged and said, "If you're a very good boy, we'll stop at the store and get whipped cream on the way back to my place."
"So you'll be my dessert?"
"Yeah. Unless you have any aversions to whipped cream I should know about."
"Nope. None."
"Then we're good to go…that's if you can let me look over the menu for a few seconds."
"You just said that you were going to have rice pudding."
"I like options."
"Because you're certifiably insane."
"I'm an insane man who was going to let you lick whipped cream off his body until you decided to get snippy."
Casey rolled his eyes. "Order your rice pudding." Casey pretended not to notice Dan's smile. He also told himself that he was not, in fact, wrapped around Dan's fingers.
When that didn't work, he focused on the idea of whipped cream and Dan for dessert.
Fin
