Chapter 1 – Prologue

Out of breath Tatsurou sank on the ground at the station and stared at the train that was just leaving and which he actually wanted to catch. As many times before the only thing he could do was listening to the chattering of the wheels on the tracks which died away soon. It was already very late and the small station was as silent and deserted like the sleeping town surrounding it. Tatsurou cursed his Boss for calling meetings always shortly before finishing time and he didn´t know if his Boss was rude or only unorganized. That´s why he left the factory at the earliest at 9.30 pm at least three times a week and couldn´t catch the last train then. He had enough money for a cab though but there was something, no someone, else that kept him from using it. It was the person waiting for him every day in the shadow of the huge columns which carried the roof of the station bravely.

The bright lights of the train he had just missed faded in the distance and the landscape was once again left behind in the dark and cold of the night. A weak sigh escaped Tatsurou´s mouth while he slowly got up, still looking wistfully at the tracks on which the train had left the station. "Be honest, you miss the train on purpose, right?" A familiar voice drew his attention and made his blood run cold. Although he was bargained for the hand that was suddenly laid on his shoulder he winced instantly. Then the dark, threatening voice broke the silence. Tatsurou was ready to scream and tell the person that this wasn´t true and that he was going to call a cab to get home, but his voice abandoned him. Only an incomprehensible caw came from his dry throat.

Tatsurou could almost feel the superior smile in his neck and he desperately hit the asphalt with the palm of his hands, feeling the coldness crawling up his entire body. Hesitantly and trembling he heaved himself up and stood on the platform shaking in his boots. His legs were turned into jelly when he turned around and raised his head to stand face to face with the person of his worst nightmares but also of his overwhelming desire. The fearsome and arrogant smile on that person's perfect face underneath the ice cold eyes gave Tatsurou the feeling of fainting soon.

A strong feeling of dizziness let the area around Tatsurou blur to a homogeneous and gloomy pulp. Thanks to the fast reaction of the person causing his weak condition he didn´t fall onto the hard asphalt. Instead, two strong arms wrapped themselves around his petite body holding him up without drastic effort. Tatsurou closed his eyes and tried to fight the dizziness which was starting to make him feel awfully sick. But his attempts were in vain. The clasping arms around his body, the hot breath near his ear and the intimidating person behind him on which he leaned like a will-less piece of flesh, all of this was too much to bear with so the sickness got the upper hand. Finally he wasn´t able to resist the impulse to choke anymore.

He jerked away from the person who was still smiling and tumbled across the platform. Barely did he reach one of the huge columns before he emptied his stomach contents on its bottom. Disgusted with him and the rest of this unjust world he slid down to the floor with his back touching the column. Huddled and motionless he sat on the chilli ground for quite a while without anything happening. Except for Tatsurou's scarcely audible sobbing that died away in the darkness of the night, no sound could be heard. Nobody talked to him, no one touched him and he wasn´t even sure if the dangerous guy was still here. The fact that he didn´t know if he should be sad or happy if the other person was already gone terrified him even more. At least he didn´t get the time to think about because while he was wondering he suddenly felt how someone gently lifted him onto his feet. "Let´s go!" It was like a command when the guy spoke to him in a deep voice that drove Tatsurou crazy every time he heard it. Not talking back he walked beside the person who owned this voice.

Tatsurou didn´t have to ask where they were going, he knew the way and the destination by heart. So he just walked the streets impassively. Approximately fifty meters straight on to the abandoned kiosk at the corner, then turn right to a small, spooky alley with lots of mouldered houses and shabby hedges, up the hill which leads out of the lonesome town and through the creaking garden gate and into the beautiful, well-kept house with the many rooms hiding secrets.

Without hesitation Tatsurou walked across the big living room and disappeared in the bathroom which he already knew better than his own. Although he knew nobody would follow him he locked the door from inside and walked to the sink sighing away. He washed his face and his mouth thoroughly. The mirror showed a totally different person when he looked in it, his cheeks were cavernous and his hair fell greasy into his pale face. The person was glassy-eyed and little water drops sparkled on its sinful full lips and left a moist trace on the soft skin. For a moment Tatsurou only watched his terrifying reflection in disbelief and felt the urge to smash the mirror.

Soon he couldn´t bear with it any longer so he turned away with a snarl and sat down on the edge of the bathtub which made him remember the scene of their first encounter. He glanced at the locked door. Nobody throbbed at it or tried to open it by force; no body called his name or pressed him to come out of the bathroom. No, he could stay in here as long as he wanted to and by the thought of it a little smile appeared on his worn out face. Carefully he slipped onto the floor and leaned against the bathtub. The sickness was long gone and only a throbbing in his head was left. Absorbed in thought he fished a blank sheet of paper and a pencil out of his bag. And while pictures and emotions of the last three months descended on him, he started to scribble individual words, then whole sentences and at last complete lyrics of a song.