Hey everyone! Tis me, Jiia! This is my first House fic, so be kind. Anyways, this was inspired by a certain social class, during which we discussed many things such as Chase in his catholic school uniform and the term sans culottes, which in old french meant a peasant, but now means to be without underwear. Enjoy.
San Culottes
"Look, everybody! I found Robbie's secret diary!" House whirled around, swivelling about his cane with surprising agility.
"Give it back!" Chase jumped up, trying to snatch the thin black book from House's hands.
"Why? Afraid I'll find out about your secret crush?" He turned to the wombat, electric eyes sparkling. "It's Foreman, isn't it? I knew it!"
"What now?" Foreman blinked, shutting the door behind him. "I heard my name."
"House is being a juvenile ass again." Chase groaned, making yet another attempt to snatch the book back.
House gasped, looking at Chase in mock shock. "You said a bad word! I'm gonna tell Mommy!"
Foreman rolled his eyes, taking his customary seat at the clear glass table.
" So, do we have a case today?" He asked, obviously contemplating the ethics of snapping a nearby book closed above the sleeping Cameron's head.
House shot him a look, absently moving the book back out of Chase's reach.
"If we had a case, do you really think I'd be letting Cameron nap on the conference table? Myself, maybe, but any of you guys? Hell no." He turned back to the furious wombat, who had finally given up and stalked over to his own chair. "What's in this thing anyway? It isn't actually your diary, is it?"
"No." Chase grumbled, searching through his various pockets for a book of crosswords and a pencil. "It's my high school yearbook."
"Just like that? You're not gonna let me pester you?" House made a face that was obviously supposed to resemble a kicked puppy.
Before Chase could answer, he flipped open the gold-embossed tome to a random page.
"Hey Wombat, who's Vincent Perez, and why does he have hearts drawn all over him?" House looked up, blinking innocently.
Of course, Chase flushed, although it wasn't entirely clear whether it was because of the implications of that or the fact that those implications were true.
"He does not have hearts drawn all over him." Chase mumbled under his breath, refusing to meet the curious gaze of any of the two conscious people in the room.
"Well," House began, speaking slowly. " Here's his picture, and here are the heart-shaped pen marks someone wrote all over it." He held the book up, indicating the picture in the middle of the page. There were indeed hearts drawn upon it, in bright pink gel-pen. "Since this is your yearbook, I would assume that someone is you. Would I be correct in this assumption?"
Chase cleared his throat, crossing his arms over his chest.
"That's what I hated most about Catholic school. There weren't any girls."
Foreman looked at him with raised eyebrows. He slowly leaned away.
"You're queer?"
"Now, Foreman, that's inappropriate. This is a HOSPITAL! We need to be politically correct. The term is 'homosexual'." House smirked. "Are you a homosexual, Chase? Don't worry, no one will think any less of you." He paused. "Well, me and Foreman might, but you'll always have Cameron."
"It's Lupus!" Cameron shot up, sitting up so fast she knocked the afore mentioned nearby book off the table with a thump that startled people in the oncology ward.
"Holy…" Foreman picked himself up off the floor. "Don't do that!"
House slowly pushed himself away from the glass window he had stumbled into, his hand pressed against his chest.
"Yes… Please don't…"
Cameron flushed.
"Sorry… I was having the weirdest dream." She shook her head, rubbing the sleep from her bleary blue eyes.
"Normally, I'd ask, but judging by your choice of wake-up exclamation, I really don't want to know." He shuddered. Lupus was not a fun thing.
"I'm not." Chase muttered, taking the opportunity to snatch is yearbook back.
House stared at him, a blank expression on his face.
"You're not what? What were we talking about before Cameron took a few decades off my life span?"
Apparently realizing that he really shouldn't have said anything, Chase sunk deeper into his seat, mumbling something from behind his curtain of soft blond hair.
"What was that? I didn't hear you." House leaned in closer, putting his hand to his ear.
"I'm not gay!" Chase shouted, causing House to topple backwards into the whiteboard.
With a single scathing glance at the startled Foreman, the Australian stormed off, his hands shoved in his pockets.
Chapter two- The uniform of DOOOOM!
