The first day of sixth grade was probably the most excited I've felt about going back to school, ever. I remember when Jem was in the sixth grade and he loved it. I'll never forget how fascinated he was with the Ancient Egyptians probably because it was tied with his fascination with football and when it comes to Jem and his football, that's huge. I prayed that I would actually have a good school year. If God could grant me a Jem Finch school year, he would work a miracle.
My brother is intelligent, good looking, and a dedicated athlete. A star boy in not only my book, but a lot of the townspeople, too. Everywhere I went with him, someone would stop what they were doing just to chat with him. I could tell that with each Miss, Mrs, or Mister, Jem would brighten their day. It's just the way he is.
That's the way I wanted to be, too. That first day of sixth grade I tried to be the sister that would match up to a brother liked Jem. I carefully picked out a nice dress ensemble to wear, making Cal and Atticus smile.
"You look nice, sweet," Atticus said as I sat down to breakfast.
"Very nice, baby," Calpurnia said as she handed me a plate of eggs and bacon.
"Thank you, both," I said as I looked at my brother who had his nose stuck in the newspaper.
"Doesn't your sister look nice, Jem," Atticus asked as he flipped the paper down away from Jem's face.
"Oh, yeah," he agreed, half-heartedly as he went back to his newspaper.
The walk to school was just as awkward. Jem still didn't pay me much mind but he stopped to say hi to anybody who had a passing greeting for him. I all of a sudden felt like a ghost.
I didn't feel much better when I got into class. I had the same teacher Jem did and she wasn't shy about letting me know what a good boy he was. I thanked her even though the way my brother acted towards me was leaving a bitter taste in my mouth. At least I could match him in the intelligence department, but there was a downside: I was a girl. It paid for a man to be smart because it would mean a better job. What does a girl have to be smart for? Doesn't take a genius to say "I do,", lay on your back, and birth a kid. Yes, I am too smart for my own good.
I figure they don't like girls who are athletic, either. Trying to be a good girl is exhausting.
I watched my classmates enjoy themselves on the playground at lunchtime and let myself feel depressed. I'll be sad today but not tomorrow. Tomorrow I won't try so hard for a brother who won't even look at me.
I solemnly walked home when the after school dismissal bell rang. I don't know if it really was the weather or just a result of bad feelings because I felt a wave of coolness. It didn't feel good and I felt even worse when I walked onto my front lawn when something significant hit me in the face. It actually knocked me on the ground. I heard someone laughing and as soon as I found out who it was, I got hot.
"You okay?" Jem asked, still laughing.
"You did that on purpose, didn't you?" I sneered with hot tears streaming down my face.
"What!?" My brother asked, kind of serious. "No. I was just practising and I didn't even see you."
"I'm not surprised!"
I tried to run into the house but he grabbed me before I could even catch the first step. He swung me around to face him and then he gave me a hug.
"What's gotten into you?" He whispered.
"You."
"What are you talking about?"
"I try so hard to be good like you and you don't even notice. I thought if you liked me this way, then other people would like me ,too. I want to be liked like you."
He didn't say anything. He just held me tighter. I held him tight, too, and the way this hug felt would mean way more to me than any of his words could. He broke away from me, grabbed my face, and gave me a kiss where the football had hit me.
"You really are a good man, Jem," I said. I meant every word.
