Consequences
by Quills

The orchestral music resonated through the tiny room as the sound
threatened to shake the very walls while the chorale
voices bellowed in full force. The selection was a Berlioz piece whose
powerful ambience had always helped Trip Tucker escape...at least
briefly...that which troubled him. Unfortunately, this time, not
even Berlioz could help the engineer escape the image he could
not blot out of his mind's eye.

She wasn't beautiful. No...not in the classical sense, but she did
have a simple pure kind of beauty that so few people possessed.
She had a spirit within her...a spirit like a newborn child full
of wonder and curiosity. In truth, that was precisely what
she had been...had been. Those words played over and over
in Trip Tucker's mind. A gentle soul whose life was cut
short because he knew what was 'right'.

Trip Tucker stood up from his bunk and walked over to the view port
once more. He had done this several times this evening. The stars
had always given him comfort. Now, nothing gave him comfort.
Not the stars...not the music...not even his Captain and friend.
In truth...he didn't deserve it. 'Charles', the name the cogenitor
had taken, certainly had no comfort given to
it. A tear threatened to fall but he willed it away. He wouldn't
cry for himself. He hadn't been able to cry for 'Charles' so he would
be damned if he would cry for himself. John was right, it was his
fault. He leaned against the view port, lying his head against the bulkhead
as he closed his eyes and wished for sleep to claim him.

Opening his eyes, he looked up questioningly. He had thought he had heard
something, but he wasn't sure. Now he was hearing things, he thought to
himself, wonderful. He needed sleep, but it just wasn't coming. Maybe he should see
the Doctor. He stood up from the fetal position he had fallen into
by the view port. His limbs ached and he was sure he strained a muscle in his back
from the awkward position. He didn't care. Slowly he made his way to the door
and then to sickbay.

The door slid open and he was about to step out when he stopped himself suddenly.
If he had gone any further he would have run directly into Sub Commander T'Pol.

"T'pol? What are you doin here?"

"I came to speak with you." she replied as she 'examined' him. He looked like
what the Captain often referred to as 'hell'. "I have pressed your door signal
several times."

"Sorry, didn't hear it." he responded as he headed back into his quarters. Now that
T'pol was here, sleep was not something he would getting any of for a while.

He let himself fall into the cushion chair in the corner as he let his arms dangle over the side.
"So, what did you want?" he asked tersely.

She stood silently for a moment as she took at the disheveled form of the ship's Chief Engineer.
Perhaps this was not a wise decision she thought to herself. He appears to be in mode of self
deprecation. He may not be willing to listen. She considered this briefly, but resigned herself to
continue with her original intention.

"I wish to speak to you about your dealings with the cogenitor."

Tucker leaned his head back and closed his eyes briefly. He did not need
this. A smug superior Vulcan showing up on his doorstep to give him
an 'I told you so' lecture.

"I know I did somthin' wrong T'Pol" said Tucker as he stared at the floor for several moments
before looking up at the Vulcan "I don't need you to come down here and remind me...alright?"

T'pol looked at Trip Tucker as she corrected him "I did not come here to 'remind'
you of anything Commander. I merely wished to see how you were doing."

A mocking grin played across Trip Tucker's face "I'm doin peachy...for uh damn murderer."

T'Pol raised a brow in surprise. She would never comprehend the human capacity to impart
greater blame upon oneself than truly existed. No, that was not quite true. She could comprehend
it in some small way. Perhaps that was the real reason she chose to see
him.

"You did not murder the Vissian Cogenitor, Commander."

"Charles" he corrected her as he choked the name out "It's name...was Charles."

She could see a pained look on his face as he said the name. She had come to
learn that the cogenitor took his name to honor him for 'enlightening' it. A fact
which, no doubt, caused him even greater anguish.

T'Pol considered her next decision carefully. She was not adept at interpersonal
relationships. Even by Vulcan standards she was more than a little reserved
at times, but she had grown to have a healthy respect for her human crewmates.
Even the erstwhile Commander Tucker whose all to human influences had become
a regular subject of nightly meditations and contemplations.

T'Pol moved towards Tucker very slowly. He looked up at her peering
through bleary eyes. "What do ya think yer doin?"

T'Pol sat down on the bunk next to the cchair Tucker was sprawled on.
She sat straight and still as she quietly collected her thought. Taking in
a deep breath she began to speak.

"I wish to tell you...a story. When I was very young, I had been assigned to the Vulcan
Security Directorate..."

Trip sat forward as he tried to pull himself off the couch "I'm sure it's facinatin' T'pol,
but I'm just not in the mood to...."

T'Pol extended her arm, hesitantly at first. She touched his hand gently with her own.
He stopped and looked up at her in surprise. She didn't say anything. She simply looked
at him. Swallowing hard he let himself fall back into the chair.

When she was certain he was not going to leave, she started again. "I was a very young and
inexperienced security officer assigned to Movar III, one of the outlying travel ports under
Vulcan supervision. My first week at my new post, I was assigned to investigate local merchants
and traders dealing in stolen artifacts and contraband being smuggled off the planet. "

Pausing for a moment she looked down at the floor. She had not thought about these events for
many years. She had forgotten how unsettling they were. "During a routine questioning, I came
across a Dolik miner who was using a group of illegal Terellians to do work for him. Movar III
has extensive deposit's of rare minerals, but they are very difficult to obtain do to the planet's
geographical composition. The Terellians, whose home world is extremely harsh and inhospitable,
were well suited for the intense heavy labor involved in Movarian mines."
She looked away from Tucker as she focused on the starlight painting the far wall.
"Movarian regulations require all workers to be registered to prevent exploitation
by profiteers. Anyone who is found to be illegally working on Movar III will
be deported and forced to return to their home world. The case was brought before
the Movarian regional magistrate who ruled the Dolik miner was exploiting the
Terellians by employing them in dangerous work for below the minimum payment
wage. He was fined and ordered to vacate the Movarian system."

Tucker looked up at her. She had grown quiet as she continued to stare at the star
Field on the wall. "What happened to the Terellians?"

Turning her head away from the wall, her gaze fell upon Tucker "They were deported
and returned to their home world as stated in Movarian law. I never knew what
happened to them after that. However, the mortality rate on Terel is as high as 75%
in some regions. That is why Terellians make such concerted efforts to leave their
home world. I had been so interested in doing what I believed was right that I never
considered the ramifications. I never looked beyond stopping an injustice."

"It took me a great deal of time to accept my part in the fate that befell them. Like you, I
held myself responsible and in large part...I was. However, like you my culpability was my
own irresponsibility. I kept asking myself if I could take action against the Dolik miner for
exploiting the Terellians. I failed to ask myself if I should. It was true...they were being
exploited for the profit of another. It is equally true that the life they had made
as miners was considerably more idyllic than the one I sent them back to."

"But you didn't send them back T'Pol." Countered Tucker "You wouldn't have done it
if you knew what woulda happened."

"And you are no murderer Commander. No more than I was." She replied "We are both
guilty of foolishly believing we knew what was right for another being. It is something we
will each have to carry with ourselves for the rest of our lives. Don't compound the
punishment by compounding your guilt in the matter."

Trip looked at the Vulcan as the tears started to fall. He didn't try to hold them back this time.
The tears flowed and he leaned forward as he began to sob uncontrollably. He had
wanted to cry all night and now the floodgates had opened.

T'Pol had been around humans long enough to expect extreme emotional reactions
in a variety of situations. She accepted it as part of working with an emotionally
charged species. However, Trip Tucker's next reaction took her by complete surprise.
Intentionally or not, he had leaned his head against her shoulder. She looked at him
with surprise as the hot tears soaked into her uniform. She was unaccustomed to
such…intimate contact. Uncertain how to respond, she held her hands above him
hesitating briefly before resting one gently on his shoulder and the other on his head.
She was uncertain if this was a proper response, but when he made no attempt to
push her away, she began to gently stroke his head as she had seen humans
do when they comforted one another.

Tucker's tears continued to flow, but the sobs had stopped. He hugged himself tightly
against the Vulcan who said nothing but continued to stroke his sandy brown hair
as she watched the tears trickle down. She knew humans cried for many reasons.
Not least of which was to rid themselves of inner turmoil. She had never cried
for her actions with the Terellians. In truth, she did not believe she knew how, but
as she watched Tucker's tears roll down his cheek she hoped that they gave
him the release he needed and that perhaps… he cried some of those tears on her behalf.

The End