Disclaimer: The only bleach i own is in my hair.


"Asano-san did you call Ichigo?" Mizuiro asked Kiego taking a bite from his chocolate bar. Mizuiro was usually on a date Thursday nights but after frequently being asked

(And even begged) from Kiego he reluctantly agreed to movie night. Little did he know that Kiego had planned a different kind of movie.

"He's still not home. I called so many times that Karin got on and said if I called again she kick a soccer ball at my head."

"Oh and what about Chad?"

"Band practice. He'll be here in an hour or two"

"Ok then. I got a great new movie. Kevin Costner is in it and it's abou-"

"Nope we are not going to see some gay movie! We are watching something I picked up on the way home the other day!" Kiego stood up and started rummaging through his closet.

"Here we go Naughty Teachers Three! It just came out last week!"

Mizuiro's face fell. He couldn't watch another movie Kiego picked. Especially a porno. Kiego had a habit of picking up the weirdest things ever. The last porno he saw with Kiego involved 12 guys and a horse.

"NO! No! Come on man! All we ever do is watch bad porn!"

"Listen this is a good one man! I even asked the clerk and there are no guys, animals or old people in it. Just young, hot, teachers. Who all happen to be female?"

Mizuiro ended up watching the movie with Kiego and had to admit it was pretty good. There was one girl who was vaguely familiar but something was on Mizuiro's mind all evening.

"Asano-san, did you ever thought what Ichigo does when he's not with us, home or with Chad?"

"Stop with the politeness! I'm your friend not you're acquaintance! Also Yes, I happen to know all about the whole Ichigo and Kuchiki-san thing"

"Really?"

"Yup, ever since Kuchiki-san transfers to our school he has been spending a considerable amount of time together. So I made three different theories of what he has been doing!"

"Three?" Mizuiro knew that Kiego would do whatever it takes to be accepted by Rukia and Ichigo.

Kiego put on a pair of glasses and showed a poster to Mizuiro that he had made. On it where different pictures of Rukia and Ichigo.

"Yes my first theory is that Rukia holds Ichigo hostage and uses him as a sex slave. And since his sexuality is in question it could be possible that it has caused him to have severe trauma and hate women. That's why he's always mean to the ladies."

"Asano-san I doubt Ichigo and Rukia are doing that."

"That's where theory number two comes in! Ichigo is really a nerd and secretly goes to dungeons and dragons tournaments all over the world. Rukia has realized this and Ichigo eventually swore her to secrecy. Then Rukia herself got into dungeons and dragons and dresses up frequently into a sexy elf costume that Ichigo can't possibly resist so they always end up having sex on top of the kitchen table!"

"Asano-san now you are just making things up. What makes you think Rukia and Ichigo are sleeping together?"

"I don't know but they are way too chummy. Only Ichigo ever gets to touch Kuchiki-san. This brings me to the third theory!"

"No please stop, Asano-san" Mizuiro could no longer take another idiotic theory and wished he never had brought up the conversation in the first place.

"Well in my third theory I figured that since Ichigo is usually home and Rukia is there with him, it could be possible that they run an underground porno studio and have the best of the industry at their house! It's the only way Ichigo and Rukia could know so much about sex and explain it in great detail!"

Kiego took off his glasses and punched a fist through the air proud of his theories.

"Asano-san. You fail" with that Mizuiro got up ready to leave and hopefully still save his night.

One last glance at the television screen and Mizuiro finally knew who the girl on the screen was.

"Asano-san isn't that you're sister?"

With that Kiego was unconscious on the floor.


A/N: I know this story is lame but a friend and i were discussing what Mizurio and Kiego actually talk about in their spare time. I hope you enjoyed a little bit of it.