"Hey Lily," a voice rang in my ear. I whipped around to find Derick, Miley's new boyfriend, smiling at me.
"Hey Derick," I replied. "What's up?"
"Wanna hang at the beach after school? Miley has to do some sort of family thing and Oliver said he's going on a date with Emily, so I guess it's just the two of us."
I felt a pang in my stomach at the mention of Oliver dating Emily, a girl who had been vicious to me ever since she started liking my aforementioned best friend.
"Sure," I shrugged. "We can go hang out at Rico's."
I met up with him at the shack, and we talked to Jackson for a while. Jackson had always been cold toward all of Miley's boyfriends, but he thought something was "off" about Derick, and could barely even stay civil. I cast Jackson a warning look as he glared openly at the brunette boy. He sighed and shrugged, telling me he would leave Miley's boyfriend alone…for now.
After we got some food, he led me over to where I always sat with Miley and Oliver. After talking and laughing for a while, he suddenly starting leaning closer to me. I looked at him oddly, but he continued his motions forward. I started shrinking back, until was completely against the back of my chair and he was completely on top of me.
"What the hell are you doing?" I asked nervously.
"Something I've wanted to do for a long time," he said, grinning sickly. He kissed me, hard, and I struggled to get away from him. Derick finally pulled away as a hurt voice gasped.
"What in the hell is going on here?" Miley screamed, drawing the attention of everyone in the area, especially people who knew us.
"Miley! It isn't what it looked like!" I hurried to explain, but she growled and turned to me and her pig of a boyfriend.
"Oh don't give me that!" she snapped. "And Derick, what the hell were you thinking? She's not even pretty!"
I gasped, wounded. Miley knew all about my insecurities, and she was shoving them back in my face without even letting me explain.
"He forced himself on me, Miley!" I shouted back, my voice becoming thick with tears.
"Shut up, you fatass whore! As if anyone would want you! You're ugly, you're fat, and you act like an effing guy all the time!" Miley sneered. Jackson leapt over the counter and rushed between us.
"Miley, Lily's telling the truth!" Jackson yelled. "I saw the whole thing!"
"So did I," said Saint Sara. There was no way that anyone could ever accuse Sara of lying, and Miley instantly looked apologetic.
"Lils, you know I didn't mean it, right?" she grinned. I scoffed and shook my head at her.
"Miley, everything you just said are things you can't take back!"
With that, I stormed off the beach, tears streaming down my face as I pounded up my porch. Oliver, who had been sitting on his porch next door, leapt off the swing that he was on and rushed toward me.
"Lil-ay!" he called after me. I turned around and smiled sadly.
"Hi Ollie," I murmured. He hugged me quickly, and held me out at arm's length.
"What happened?" he asked immediately.
"Nothing," I said unconvincingly. "Honestly. Miley and I got in a fight because she caught Derick kissing me, and she didn't believe me when I said he forced himself on me. Then Jackson and Sara told her the truth, and she apologized, but she had insulted me pretty bad so I can't quite forgive her yet. I will, though."
"If you're sure you're okay…" Oliver trailed off.
"What happened to your date with Emily?"
"She was talking shit about you so I left," my best friend shrugged.
"What'd she say?" I asked. I wasn't sure why I was just setting myself up for more hurt. Hadn't I had enough for the day? Obviously not.
"She said you were unattractive and fat and some crap," Oliver shrugged. I pretended like it didn't effect me before I said I needed to go shower and ran into my house and up into my bathroom.
I took one look at myself in the mirror as I undressed for the shower, turned on the water so that no one could hear anything that I was about to do, blasted my iPod speakers that I had brought in the bathroom, and stuck the toothbrush down my throat.
When I was done getting rid of the food in my stomach, I sighed shakily and got into the shower, letting the hot water scald my skin, almost enjoying the pain. I sang along to the Linkin Park song that clicked onto my iPod.
What I've done,
I'll face myself,
To cross out what I've become,
Erase myself,
To let go of,
What I've done.
And to ask,
What you've thought of me,
I clean this slate,
With the hands,
Of uncertainty,
So let mercy come,
And wash away,
What I've done.
The next day, I managed to "oversleep" and avoid breakfast. I accepted Miley's apology, acting like it didn't effect me, but the real reason I accepted was because I knew it was true. Derick, was, of course, totally out of the picture, thank God. He was sending glares at our table at lunch constantly, and Miley was huffing in annoyance while Oliver munched happily on one of his totally grody sandwiches.
"Why aren't you eating, Lily?" Oliver asked. Well, at least I gathered as much. It really sounded like IareooeafingWiwy?
"Not hungry," I shrugged. "Big breakfast."
Oliver seemed to buy it. Miley shot me a look as my stomach growled. I giggled nervously and leapt up from the table, muttering something about talking to Jake before shooting out of my seat and racing through the crowd of girls to Jake.
Jake and I had become really, really good friends after he and Miley's breakup because he wasn't "normal enough". I had felt bad for him. I mean, sure, he'd been ridiculous, but she hadn't even given him a real fighting chance and come clean to him, and she hadn't even had the decency to just break up with him. She humiliated him and herself on national television!
"Hey Jake," I panted, sliding into the seat next to him. "Your hoard of admirers is getting fiercer by the day, you know. I almost got decapitated trying to get over here."
Jake laughed. "I can imagine. What're you doing over here?"
"A girl can't visit her bestie?" I giggled in a perfect imitation of Ashley. Jake laughed again but shot me a look that he wasn't going to drop the subject. I sighed. "Miley insulted me pretty bad and I forgave her but I'm still a bit annoyed."
"You know whatever she said isn't true, right?" Jake said bitterly. Miley was still a sore spot for him. I patted his head sympathetically and smiled.
"I can only hope so," I chuckled. "I've gotta jet. We're hanging out tonight, right? You, me, and Oliver?"
"Yeah," he said excitedly. He and Oliver were best guy friends. Oliver was my best friend in the world, while Miley was my best girl friend, and Jake was my best guy friend.
"See ya then!" I called as I left the cafeteria. Oliver caught up with me, tugging on my sleeve.
"What's going on with you, Lil-ay?" he asked. He knew that using my nickname could get almost anything out me, but not this.
"Nothing's wrong, Triple O," I replied. "Honest. It's no big thing."
"If you're sure," he said with a small gesture. "See you after school, right? You, me, and Jake?"
"Mmhmm," I affirmed. "We'll probably watch a movie."
"What's Miley gonna do?" he asked softly. I shot him a look. I'd been suspicious of him crushing on her for ages. I sighed and turned to him.
"You like her, don't you?"
'WHAT?! No!" he half shouted.
"Ollie, you know you can tell me anything, right?" I said, and he nodded. "Then why can't you be honest with me?!"
"Lily, I swear," Oliver said firmly, gripping both of my shoulders. "I don't like Miley."
"Okay," I smiled, relieved inside. Miley had everything I'd ever wanted; an awesome dad who loved her, a funny brother, a popstar alter ego, good looks, plenty of guys whenever she wanted them, and good grades.
"Let's go to class," Oliver grinned at me, putting his warm arm around my shoulders while my heartbeat quickened.
"Your big game is next week, right?" I asked him. Oliver had developed a huge talent for soccer, and I'd been to every single game. He always leant me an extra jersey to wear with my jeans, to show who I was supporting. I was also in charge of wearing my plain, worn black baseball cap, which he insisted was lucky.
"Yeah," he said excitedly. "We've been trying out a lot of different moves, and I think I've finally got one down that'll blow Westlake out of the water."
"Sweet," I agreed, beaming up at him. When we made it to English, my head was spinning, and I couldn't distinguish between the lack of food or my proximity to Oliver. When I sat down in my seat, however, I realized it must be the lack of eating. I grumbled, forcing myself to get through this.
Maybe if I was like Miley, Oliver would like me. If I was skinnier, prettier, more girly; if I could be more like Miles, he was sure to like me. At least I hoped.
