Author's Note: Stilinskiismybatman found that Liam's reaction after finding out Mason is basically gone was a bit too mellow, and I had to agree. Hence why I was asked to fix that. Enjoy!
With his back pressed against the wall, Liam couldn't help but try and remain strong. He threw Scott's protective arm away from him.
"Mason!" he called.
"Liam, come back!"
Scott set off, spurting into the night, following his beta. With heightened senses, he zoomed in on the sound of Liam's footsteps; light and hasty. Scott's lungs swelled from the deep breaths he was taking, meanwhile trying not to trip over loose branches and scattered leaves that the forest had shed. Further ahead, his wolf could make out Liam's scent, which reassured Scott that his beta wasn't as far away as he was thinking.
"Mason! Mason, please, I can't…" he heard Liam whimper between panting breaths. From the desperation in his voice, Scott could fill in the rest of that sentence. He swallowed, his own fear growing inside his stomach, mixed with worry.
Worry that Liam might push him away again.
At the thought Scott's heart squeezed together, releasing a punch of adrenaline. Thankful, he looked up at the dark sky and pushed his legs to go a little faster. His muscles burned, but the ache felt good from the endorphins that were now rushing through his veins.
Only seconds later, Liam appeared into his sight and slowly Scott inched closer and closer.
"Liam. Liam, stop!" he shouted, but the boy didn't respond. He didn't even seem to hear him.
Scott exhaled heavily through his nose, grunting. The wolf inside of him was starting to get annoyed; betas were supposed to listen to their alphas. Scott resisted the urge to roar Liam's name.
He could see the folds in Liam's shirt. He was so close. Scott reached out his arm, fingers stretching as far as he could, but only to frustratingly graze Liam's back. So close. Scott grumbled, preparing himself for the burst of energy his legs were about to perform.
He jumped, lunging himself forward, dirt sweeping up from underneath his shoes.
His chest touched Liam's back, arm trailing around the boy's neck. The other around his waist. Knowing that the unavoidable impact with the ground was going to be a rough one, Scott closed his eyes. His neck twisted into an awkward angle as his body curled around Liam's, rolling over him. Then Liam over him. Scott over Liam. Grunts and utters and pain and then…
Stillness.
Liam was on top of Scott, still wrapped in his arms, only now they were covered in cuts and bruises. Their breathing still heavy, Scott didn't loosen his grip, scared his beta might run off again.
But with his back pressed against Scott's chest, Liam couldn't help but break down.
"He's gone," he blurted out, at first confused. "He's gone," he repeated, the words slowly dawning on him.
"Liam…"
"He's gone." The boy choked, limbs suddenly starting to tremble. First it seemed to form a steady rhythm, like shivers creeping down his spine, but eventually they became more and more uncontrolled.
Scott swallowed, trying to catch his breath. He squirmed and crawled out from under Liam, who didn't move except for his vigorously shaking arms and legs.
"Liam, you have to calm down," Scott said, shifting onto his knees. He lifted Liam's upper body up a little, scooting closer to him. Liam's head fell back into his lap. He was in the same position as when Liam had woken up a week ago in the hospital, after he had fainted. Melissa sticking a needle into Lydia's open neck wound had proven to be a bit too much for him. Scott had moved Liam's head onto his legs and was wiping the sweat from his forehead when he woke up. Much like his alpha was doing now.
"I can't feel my legs," Liam said with a terrified look. "Scott, I feel weird."
Scott nodded, biting his bottom lip. "I know," was all he said. "It's okay. You're okay. Just…deep breaths, okay?" He knew from Stiles' panic attacks that there wasn't much he could do, except for remind Liam to breathe, try to shift his focus onto something relaxing and reassure him that it was going to be okay.
Liam licked his lips, eyes trained onto Scott's. "My chest…" he panted. "My chest feels so tight."
Scott looked down and moved his arm away, to Liam's shoulder instead, rubbing it softly. The thumb on his other hand continued to stroke Liam's forehead. "Focus on your breathing," he told him.
Slowly, Liam started to calm down. Like steam, the sense of panic evaporated from his mind and a couple of minutes later he could think clearly again. Only to realize, again, what had happened. Tears welled up in his eyes.
"Mason's gone," he said softly, looking up at Scott. "Isn't he?"
Scott sighed, because how could he answer that question? Liam was most likely right: Mason was gone. His entire sense of being had been swallowed up by the Beast. Drenched into darkness. Sucked up into nothingness. But how could Scott admit that to him? Last month Hayden had died, and now Mason? How was Liam going to cope with all that heartache?
"I can't go through this again," Liam whimpered.
"You won't have to," Scott lied.
He had said the same about Hayden; had reassured Liam that he would find a way to help her, but in the end had failed. Even worse: had refused. He had consciously decided against helping and had blamed it on the fifty/fifty chance that Hayden might not survive the bite. Now, he wasn't even sure there was a ten percent chance he would be able to save Mason.
"I'm going to do anything I can to help him."
At least that was a promise he could make.
Liam nodded, still trembling slightly.
"Are you cold?" Scott asked when he noticed.
"No, just feel a little…shaky, I guess."
Scott hummed, not really knowing what to say to that. He figured they should get a move on at some point, but somehow he couldn't be bothered to suggest it. There was something about having Liam in his lap that brought back so many memories. If anything, this position had so much meaning for them. It was their caring position. Scott brushing the end of his sleeve, the back of his hand or the tip of his thumb across Liam's forehead had this weight to it. Most likely because he'd only done it after something terrible or sad had happened. But Scott had never noticed that pattern before.
On the contrary, Liam had. The feeling of Scott's fingers carding though his hair brought so much comfort. It made him feel safe, and balanced. Like, the touch could completely mesmerize him, relaxing him completely. Mason had once told him it's because it subconsciously reminds someone of their parents. Like, when his mom would stroke the back of his head when he would feel sick or when his dad would ruffle his hair as he was laughing, because he had given in to his teasing. Mason always had random facts like that. Sometimes he had seemed to know everything.
He had.
Had, because he was gone.
Liam's bottom lip started pouting again, a lump growing in his throat. There simply wasn't anything he could do about it – it was just a physical reaction. And the realization that his body was naturally responding to his heartache, made it even worse.
Scott wiped his forehead.
"Come on. You're getting cold," he said, "we need to go home."
Liam nodded, slowly hurling himself up. "Each to our own?" he asked when they were both on their feet.
Scott knew what that question actually meant. He showed a crooked smile, squeezing Liam's neck. "Me to yours?"
Liam nodded gratefully. "Yes, please."
They arrived at the Dunbar household thirty minutes later, a little past midnight. The cuts on Scott's arms from tackling Liam had already healed, yet both boys felt cold and beaten. Mason's transformation and the Beast killing the Dread Doctors still fresh images on their minds.
Liam motioned for Scott to be quiet as he opened up the gate to the backyard, but Scott had figured as much already. After a big jump, they were both on the roof, in front of Liam's bedroom window. The boy opened it silently before crawling in, and Scott followed, closing the window behind him.
When he turned around, he saw Liam standing in front of his closet door, where a sea of pictures had been put up. His fingers were lightly touching some of the ones who had Mason on them and for a minute Scott stood there frozen, watching him, a tightness around his heart that he could only explain as an empathy so severe that it made him wonder if the Alpha-Beta bond might mean being able to feel each other's feelings as well.
Scott walked closer to Liam and put a hand on his shoulder, unable to watch him grieve any longer.
"We'll get him back," he whispered.
Liam rubbed his arm over his eyes and nodded, but didn't say anything. His silence made Scott wonder if trying to give his friend hope was wrong, especially since it might turn out to be false hope.
His face fell ever so slightly, but Scott still tried to look confident and strong. "Do you want the left side, or the right?"
Liam snorted – Scott's heart fluttered – and answered, "Left, always."
"Okay," Scott replied silently, not taking his eyes off Liam as the boy turned around. But the older teen didn't let go of his shoulder, instead sort of lead him, which was quite odd, considering this was not Scott's bedroom. Liam didn't mind, though, for it showed off his alpha's caring nature – one he secretly loved very much and.
He undressed himself and sat down on the bed, looking up at Scott, who was getting out of his clothes as well. "I can't believe you're taking care of me, again."
Scott frowned as he unbuttoned his jeans. "What do you mean?"
Liam looked away. "After what had happened at the library... After I…you know…after I had tried to kill you…" He swallowed, hands folded between his bare knees. "When you said you weren't mad about that anymore, I told you I was going to save your life for once, instead of you saving me all the time."
"I thought you wanted to save my life as compensation for trying to kill me," Scott said, followed by a light chuckle. He moved over to the other end of the bed and got in. Liam crawled under the covers as well.
"You know what I mean," he said in a slightly upset voice.
Scott turned more serious and nodded, folding his hands under his pillow. Both boys were lying sideways so that they could look at each other. "I do," he admitted, "but what has happened tonight isn't about that. I mean, it's not this mathematical or fair transaction where I do something for you and then, in turn, you do something for me. It's not about 'returning the favour'. And life doesn't work that way either. Sometimes, I do something for you. And then maybe again. And then maybe you help me. Or maybe even four times in a row. Who knows? Point is, like I've said before, I have already forgiven you for what happened at the library. I know Theo had gotten into your head and then you lost Hayden and…" Scott sighed, staring down into Liam's eyes. Internally, he debated if he should say what he wanted to say, and where his initial reaction had been not to, he was now hesitating.
"Okay, I'm gonna tell you something."
Liam's eyebrows knitted together, seemingly intrigued. For a second, he had seemed to forgotten about Mason. Scott didn't open up about personal stuff that often, so he wanted to cherish this moment.
Scott licked his lips, searching for the right words. "The reason that I've never blamed you for trying to kill me is because… It's because I feel guilty about what has happened with Hayden."
Liam's frown deepened. "Guilty?"
"You asked me for help and I refused," Scott answered, words leaving his mouth in a haste. "And then she died…"
"Yeah…and then she was brought back to life," Liam said bluntly.
"But we didn't know that was going to happen back then," Scott explained. "So, I think I kind of see you trying to kill me as my payback. I'd done something wrong, something that turned out to have terrible consequences, and you punished me for that. If anything, I feel like I need to make things right again with you."
Liam scoffed. "That's bullshit. You don't have to at all."
Scott's lips curled into a gentle smile. "Exactly. Like you don't have to make things right with me either."
Liam's eyes narrowed.
"I know how guilt feels. It's the worst. But if we're both telling each other not to feel guilty, then why can't we just do that?"
Liam shook his head, but a hint of a smile appeared on his face. "Fine, you got me."
Scott's gaze intensified and after his friend had turned back to more serious as well, he asked, "Do I?"
Liam stayed quiet for a moment, but eventually finally answered, "Yes."
Scott smiled and he scooted closer, extending his arms towards his beta. Liam moved into his embrace, nuzzling his chin in the nape of Scott's neck. A heavy breath left his lungs and Scott's fingers stroked his hair.
"We'll get him back."
Liam closed his eyes and nodded slightly, "I know."
