A/N: You know those things that just pop into your head demanding to get out? Well, this is one of those. It can be taken as a side-story/follow-up/sequel/whatever to "Don't Go Away", but it works on its own , too.
A bunch of thanks to my faithful betas, Twinkie, Sandy and Meablie who suffer from my overly creative moments. *loves*
Yoji POV
~* Fifth that Night *~
I stepped out into the cool late night air inhaling as much of the city as possible and gathering the beat of life around me as a warm cover from the world of hurt. Warm yellow lights embraced me in the street-corners as I moved along. The pavement under my feet was stable – just what I needed tonight.
It was easy to forget in the middle of the city. There was so much more to see, so much more to feel. My personal disasters meant nothing to the rest of the world.
Sadly, they meant everything to me. Loneliness could kill a man, I knew. And I wasn't planning on dying that way.
Smoking my third cigarette that night, I made my way to the park and sat down on the nearest bench, trying not to care about the cuddling teenagers on another next to it. Of course, I couldn't keep my eyes to myself. Damn, why did everyone but me have to have someone tonight?
I had learnt to deal with my loneliness but it wasn't a thing one could completely forget. Sometimes, on nights such as this, when I was all by myself with nothing but a pack of cigarettes and a bottle of wine to accompany me, the hollow feeling crept up to me taking over my entire being. There was nowhere to escape, then. All I could do was to try to forget.
The smoke from my cigarette drifted into the cool air and I followed it's drifting. Just like the smoke, my seemingly self-secure facade could flutter into nothingness. It didn't need much, just a little blow.
All I needed to fade away was one too many of those little blows. And the knowledge wasn't pleasant at all. I needed something to save me from disappearing, but I had nothing. I was alone.
So completely alone.
I finished the cigarette and tossed it to the ground. The smoke kept drifting for a little while longer. Then it just died.
I felt someone's gaze upon me. What a sight I must have been; a man with no sense of pride left following the slow death of a cigarette. I could have chuckled at the thought if I had had the strength to.
"Dwelling in self-pity, are we?" he asked and I didn't bother to answer. My business was my own. Strangers had no share on it.
Obviously he didn't care about my silence and sat down next to me. I scooted further from him and didn't bother to spare him a look. I hoped he would leave if I acted as if I wasn't interested.
"All alone in the world. Not a nice role to play," he noted. I raised my brow and lit another cigarette. My fourth that night.
"No, not at all, " I admitted. The sky was turning into a lighter hue, now. The sunrise wasn't that far away.
"Too bad we've all been there," he said as if it was a great confession. Now, maybe I wanted to know who this intruder was. My silent brooding moments were rare and I wanted to handle them on my own. Therefore I wanted to know the identity of this person who had stepped in and messed up my nice moment of sorrow. I threw him a sideways glance and then tried to hide my surprise. It was strange that I hadn't recognized his voice.
I had wished for something to ease my loneliness and got him. How ironic.
He folded his arms behind his neck and leaned back on the bench. "There's no need to feel special. Everyone mopes every now and then," he commented. I felt the urge to tell him just how interested I was about his opinions, but kept my mouth shut, still hoping my silence would make him leave.
Naturally, he remained just where he was, that sadistic bastard. I wasn't feeling numb anymore. Now I was close to feeling murderous.
I raised my gaze to the sky and watched it change color just to refrain from committing a murder. I wondered just how long I had been out. I hadn't checked the time when I had left, but the again, time didn't matter much. There was no one expecting me to return home. The thought made me remember the utmost reason for my hiding in the city. There was the hollow feeling again.
I snapped out of my thoughts when I felt his hand on my own. The intrusion naturally irked me and I turned to tell him to back off and let me sulk in peace. It turned out that all he did was snatched my cigarette and took a nice long drag of it. He didn't even bother to return it to me; that damned skunk.
I lit my fifth cigarette that night and threw him a warning glare. This cigarette was mine, not his and he'd better to keep his hands to himself.
He grinned in a rather annoying manner and stretched his arms as if he was finally planning to leave. My hopes were crushed to nothingness, anyhow, as he folded his arms back behind his neck. I wanted to tell him off, but I knew talking to him would only encourage him to stay longer. So, I remained sitting silently on my place.
For a long while there was a pleasant silence that made it possible to forget about his presence. I savored every second of that quiet moment and finished my cigarette in peace. I was slowly starting to feel ready to go back and get some sleep before it was my turn to take over the shop.
I turned to wish him – if only a little sarcastically – a good night but he was already gone. I smiled a little to myself and stood up.
It was pretty logical, anyway.
~FIN
Feedback is always a good thing. *hint hint*
I have my own views as to who "he" might be, but I'll let you think what you like.
A bunch of thanks to my faithful betas, Twinkie, Sandy and Meablie who suffer from my overly creative moments. *loves*
Yoji POV
~* Fifth that Night *~
I stepped out into the cool late night air inhaling as much of the city as possible and gathering the beat of life around me as a warm cover from the world of hurt. Warm yellow lights embraced me in the street-corners as I moved along. The pavement under my feet was stable – just what I needed tonight.
It was easy to forget in the middle of the city. There was so much more to see, so much more to feel. My personal disasters meant nothing to the rest of the world.
Sadly, they meant everything to me. Loneliness could kill a man, I knew. And I wasn't planning on dying that way.
Smoking my third cigarette that night, I made my way to the park and sat down on the nearest bench, trying not to care about the cuddling teenagers on another next to it. Of course, I couldn't keep my eyes to myself. Damn, why did everyone but me have to have someone tonight?
I had learnt to deal with my loneliness but it wasn't a thing one could completely forget. Sometimes, on nights such as this, when I was all by myself with nothing but a pack of cigarettes and a bottle of wine to accompany me, the hollow feeling crept up to me taking over my entire being. There was nowhere to escape, then. All I could do was to try to forget.
The smoke from my cigarette drifted into the cool air and I followed it's drifting. Just like the smoke, my seemingly self-secure facade could flutter into nothingness. It didn't need much, just a little blow.
All I needed to fade away was one too many of those little blows. And the knowledge wasn't pleasant at all. I needed something to save me from disappearing, but I had nothing. I was alone.
So completely alone.
I finished the cigarette and tossed it to the ground. The smoke kept drifting for a little while longer. Then it just died.
I felt someone's gaze upon me. What a sight I must have been; a man with no sense of pride left following the slow death of a cigarette. I could have chuckled at the thought if I had had the strength to.
"Dwelling in self-pity, are we?" he asked and I didn't bother to answer. My business was my own. Strangers had no share on it.
Obviously he didn't care about my silence and sat down next to me. I scooted further from him and didn't bother to spare him a look. I hoped he would leave if I acted as if I wasn't interested.
"All alone in the world. Not a nice role to play," he noted. I raised my brow and lit another cigarette. My fourth that night.
"No, not at all, " I admitted. The sky was turning into a lighter hue, now. The sunrise wasn't that far away.
"Too bad we've all been there," he said as if it was a great confession. Now, maybe I wanted to know who this intruder was. My silent brooding moments were rare and I wanted to handle them on my own. Therefore I wanted to know the identity of this person who had stepped in and messed up my nice moment of sorrow. I threw him a sideways glance and then tried to hide my surprise. It was strange that I hadn't recognized his voice.
I had wished for something to ease my loneliness and got him. How ironic.
He folded his arms behind his neck and leaned back on the bench. "There's no need to feel special. Everyone mopes every now and then," he commented. I felt the urge to tell him just how interested I was about his opinions, but kept my mouth shut, still hoping my silence would make him leave.
Naturally, he remained just where he was, that sadistic bastard. I wasn't feeling numb anymore. Now I was close to feeling murderous.
I raised my gaze to the sky and watched it change color just to refrain from committing a murder. I wondered just how long I had been out. I hadn't checked the time when I had left, but the again, time didn't matter much. There was no one expecting me to return home. The thought made me remember the utmost reason for my hiding in the city. There was the hollow feeling again.
I snapped out of my thoughts when I felt his hand on my own. The intrusion naturally irked me and I turned to tell him to back off and let me sulk in peace. It turned out that all he did was snatched my cigarette and took a nice long drag of it. He didn't even bother to return it to me; that damned skunk.
I lit my fifth cigarette that night and threw him a warning glare. This cigarette was mine, not his and he'd better to keep his hands to himself.
He grinned in a rather annoying manner and stretched his arms as if he was finally planning to leave. My hopes were crushed to nothingness, anyhow, as he folded his arms back behind his neck. I wanted to tell him off, but I knew talking to him would only encourage him to stay longer. So, I remained sitting silently on my place.
For a long while there was a pleasant silence that made it possible to forget about his presence. I savored every second of that quiet moment and finished my cigarette in peace. I was slowly starting to feel ready to go back and get some sleep before it was my turn to take over the shop.
I turned to wish him – if only a little sarcastically – a good night but he was already gone. I smiled a little to myself and stood up.
It was pretty logical, anyway.
~FIN
Feedback is always a good thing. *hint hint*
I have my own views as to who "he" might be, but I'll let you think what you like.
