A/N: So this is depressing. Warning is that this may be a trigger for some people, and if you ever need help. Don't be afraid to call somebody, or the suicide helpline. Character Death is ahead.

Dislclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter, or Hermione. I based this song off My Last Resort by Papa Roach. I don't own that either.


"I am the most screwed up person ever..."

Hermione typed the words into her laptop which was open to notepad. The name of the file was labeled: Flaws

Her head hurt from thinking too much, sometimes she wished she was like Lavender. The girl couldn't even think that much, all that came out of that mouth was stupid nicknames for others. That would be much better for her though. She would rather be a dumbass airhead then a gryffindor, bestfriend of the chosen one. The girl with the brains, the smartest witch of her age. She would rather have none of that if it meant she would be with him.

Ron though, the guy she wanted, the guy who didn't want her... She typed another thing and it appeared on the screen, mocking her. Unwanted.

She would rather be hot, the dream girl every guy wants then be who she is right now. From al lthe shit she takes, she deserved something. All she got was nothing though.

Fat

Not pretty enough

Too smart

Hair

Clothes

All those words seemed to pop out at her, killing her piece by piece. She looked to the side of her bed where she was sitting at three am in the morning. It was the summer of 5th year, going into her 6th year at hogwarts. She wasn't desirable, most guys were intersted in her so they could play her. She was a broken girl, who got thrown away too many times. She was sick of being a broken piece, she wasn't whole at all...

Tears flowed down her face as she stared at the screen again. All her pain, she couldn't share with anyone because they would question why. She didn't know why she was like this...She didn't know, and maybe she didn't want to know why. Maybe she was sick of having all the answers. She was sick of overthinking stuff that she unloaded it all on her bestfriend and risked losing her.

It was over a boy too, one she hadn't known long. He was a muggle, a nice one too. It was all too confusing. Everythinh was lately. Three months ago she had lost her cousin and had to miss the last couple weeks of school. It didn't mean much since she had everything done, but it effected her. It hurt her every night and day, whenever she saw a refrence to him, she grew sadder. Her parents never noticed, her friends didn't either. She was invisable. How can she explain what was wrong when she didn't even know herself?

How did they expect her to tell them what was happening, when her mind was in swirls. she wanted it to end, all the questions, all the lies. Al lthe tears over one thing. Sh was depressed, something was happening to her, and nobody noticed. All she wanted was to be noticed!

Invisible

Unseen

Imperfection

Different

Mudblood...

Maybe if she had a different life...She was sick of the maybe's. She was sick of the hurt and pain she felt in her chest because of everything...everyone...

She didn't want to be in this life anymore, maybe if she was born again she would be free of these memories. She wouldn't have to live life with a fake smile and laugh. She wouldn't have to resort to this in her other life. She reached into her bedside counter and pulled out her knife, the one she was oh so familiar with. She needed to do this...It didn't matter if people would miss her or not, they should have said it when she was there.

Rolling up her sleeve her fingers touched the past mistakes, all 150 of them. Not counting the scars layer her stomach and legs. Taking a deep breath she did it. She stabbed her arm with the knife, not even noticing the pain. She wasn't even feeling it, all she felt was the sweet release of herself. She kept stabbing, trying to lose blood faster, she knew it would work because this time she was getting the important ones. She could of done away with herself with magic, but she knew she deserved pain, and a bloody release from the world.

She didn't even care about the mess, because in a few minutes she didn't have to worry anymore. Soon though she would soar, high into the sky. Where she belonged, maybe then she would be happy. Maybe then she would be free...

Just a whore

I would be better off if I were dead

Why me?

Her soul left her body, her eyes slowly closing as she let go of her last breath. The sound escaping from her lips, almost like a whisper. All that was left for people to find was her bloody body, unmoving with a smile on her lips. Her laptop open to the file that she had been stareing at, the only word bolded.

Broken...


A/N: Review tell me what you think. this is just a oneshot to get my mind floing. Also it let me get out some steam...

~Tori Sohma