Disclaimer: I still don't own Squaresoft, Final fantasy, Manchester United, the Elvis Estate or every little thing she does is magic by the police. As always what I own can be placed in a very very small bag if I had a bag that is, so sue if you want but bring your own bag because I have none.
A/N: Yet another songfic this time about Squall and Rinoa's relationship and how he handles it. Done to Every little thing she does is magic by the police. I'm trying something a little different here as well each verse will be a separate chapter. Thanks as always to mieka .Special thanks of course Alex for sticking with my insane rambles.
Though I've tried before to tell her
Of the feelings I have for her in my heart
Every time that I come near her
I just lose my nerve
As I've done from the start
They had been together for almost a year now and even though he had tried to open up more he found that he hadn't been able to. It was getting to the stage where he wasn't sure he was ever going to change.
"Squall we have to talk" she said to him as she entered the bathroom.
"huh" he said.
"Squall, are you listening to me" she asked as she looked at him.
"huh" he answered while he brushed his teeth.
" Squall I said we have to talk" she said becoming irritated.
"Yeah I know, we'll talk tonight ok" he said as he finished brushing his teeth.
"Ok" She said resignedly, she knew he wasn't going to talk now.
They both dressed in silence and he left to go to his office. The same routine day in, day out he thought to himself. He was increasingly becoming annoyed by his rituals, every time she had tried to get him to change something he had resisted. He was starting to worry that maybe he didn't have it in him to change, even though really wanted to.
"What's wrong with me" he said and entered the elevator.
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He spent the day doing paperwork and thinking about her, no matter what she was always in his thoughts. She had changed him but not much, sure he talked to others more, just to her less. It wasn't that he didn't want to talk to her, it was actually the complete opposite. As he finished another pile of paperwork he thought back to the night before.
"Squall this place is beautiful" she said and smiled at him.
"Yeah it's ok" he said as they sat in the restaurant.
"Squall it's more than ok, it's beautiful right" she said and pretended to be annoyed at him.
"Ok it's beautiful" he said back, thinking that the only thing beautiful about this place was her.
"Squall is everything ok" she asked seeing he was lost in thought.
"Yeah Rin everything's fine" he said and noticed she was now smiling again, god how I love it when she smiles at me he thought.
"Good let's order" she said as the waiter arrived.
They had eaten their food and left the restaurant, as they walked back to his car she turned to him and smiled. It had been the perfect evening, they had laughed, they had talked to each other (really talked), they had both just enjoyed being together. But as usual he was about to ruin the whole night.
"Squall thanks for tonight" she said as she moved towards him.
"Your welcome" he said and smiled at her.
"Squall I….I…." she mumbled as she kissed him.
"I love you" she said as she broke from the kiss.
"…………"
"Squall I said I love you" she said waiting for him to say something.
"……….."
"That's it nothing, I tell you I love you and nothing" she said as her eyes started to tear up.
"Damn you Squall, cant you say anything" she said as the tears started to flow from her eyes.
He looked at her as she ran away from him, she loves me, I can't believe she loves me. Why can't I tell her, why can't I say anything to her, what the hell is wrong with me he thought as he realised he couldn't see where she had gone..
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As he got ready to leave his office he remembered what had happened after the restaurant, damn he was such an idiot he thought to himself.
He had caught up with her as she went into their room, he could see the tears drying on her cheeks and the new ones that had replaced them. She went straight to the bedroom and closed the door behind her. He walked to the door and softly knocked.
"Go away Squall" she said tearfully.
He said nothing and went and slept on the couch trying to figure out what to do. He wanted to go into the bedroom, he wanted to comfort her, he wanted to make everything all right between them. He wanted so much just to hold her, but he didn't he stayed on the couch and did nothing.
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He walked back to their room, she had said that they had needed to talk and as usual she was right. This time however it would be different, this time he would tell her, this time everything would work out he thought as he headed to their room.
"Rin" he said as he entered to no answer.
"Rin are you in here" he said as he looked around the room.
"Rin" he shouted now becoming worried.
There was no answer, he checked the room and found that her clothes were gone. On the table he noticed a note with his name on it. He picked it up and immediately felt his world come crashing down around him.
My dearest Squall,
By the time you read this note I shall be gone,
I'm sorry that it's ended this way believe me I am,
But perhaps it wasn't meant to be, I tried to be there for you,
I tried to wait, but in the end it seems this wasn't enough,.
I now know you don't feel the same way I do,
and because of this I have to go,.
As much as I love you,
you don't feel the same
the thoughts of this are too much
for me to bear,
if I have to see you every day.
Goodbye my knight,
I will love you always,
Rinoa.
He read the note and fell to the floor, as he did the small black box he had in his pocket fell out and the opened. He reached over picked it up and started to cry.
"Rin, I love you" he said aloud as he looked at the diamond ring.
