A/n: yeah I really wanted to write this after I watched a video on You Tube; it was to Lacrymosa by Evanescence- akuroku. Very cute and sad. SO! This is a result of my 5 minute depression ^^;

He was gone. The only thing that ever meant anything to Roxas was gone. "You lied to me, Sora." was the only thing the blond could say. He whispered to himself over and over again. "You lied to me… You said we would be together forever…" He sighed and watched as the moon caught a shine on the razor in his hand. "We were all each other had. Why did you leave me alone?" The red seeped through his skin and overflowed, dripping slowly to the ground. "You lied to me…" Another cut, what did that make? Thirteen now? Three more to go, the years they spent through hell together. Fourteen. Now only two; Roxas let the tears fall freely, no one was there to watch him at his worst; no one ever was, only Sora; and now he was gone. So why hide? Fifteen. He sobbed and screamed. This pain was too much, and how would he deal with school tomorrow? Did anyone even know that the twins existed? I guess now they weren't the depressed twins anymore, now it was just Roxas, no Sora to cry with anymore. Shit, too deep. Roxas reached for the rag he kept close and pressed it to his newest slit as the blood immediately soaked through to his fingers. Sixteen. Sixteen cuts decorated his wrist. But why stop there? Oh yeah, Sora would have hit him on the first one, and probably made him bathe in lemon juice and salt for this many, much less more. 'Leave it at sixteen', he thought to himself. Then spoke out loud again, "You lied to me, Sora." he had another sleepless night drowned in tears and this time blood as well.

It had been years since he cut himself. He promised Sora he would quit when the brunette first found out. But it just goes to show that not all promises can be kept, especially the ones that keep you sane

.

This time something else slipped from the boy's lips, "I miss you brother." Sora and Roxas had always been close, hell they were all each other had. Their mother had died at such a young age from overdose in crank and they were constantly transferred from foster home to foster home. No woman would take in meth babies for fear of trouble. Unfortunately Roxas fell into this trouble, he had first found weed in 5th grade and of course things quickly progressed. He had been trying to quit his horrible addiction for some time now; but now it all just seemed pointless.

Roxas pulled out a small box he kept under the bed in his apartment; in it were his long awaited pipe and some glistening white powder. Oh, how he missed this, it been a month too long since the blond got high and now he needed it more than ever. He could only let out a strangled pathetic laugh when he remembered Soar's face, and as he packed the powder. How much the boy hated drugs and refused even a cigarette, straight edge as it gets; leaving Roxas with the terrible, addictive, craving genes. Wonderful... "I'm sorry Sora." he mumbled as he light up the pure as snow powder. He took a deep inhale and the room started to spin. 'I've missed this.' he thought to himself as he light up again. 'Such a lightweight...need more.' he pored some more powder in his pipe and took another long drag releasing the smoke into the air.

"Need a drink." he said to no one as he stumbled to the kitchen pipe still in hand.

"Water," he reached around in the fridge for a bottle of water but grabbed a Pepsi instead, "works." he mumbled and took a sip feeling the burn rush down his throat killing the very nerves within it.

Then he snapped... Roxas fell to the floor in tears dropping the can and his pipe. "Sora!" he screamed and clutched his head as the tears ran like water fall.

"Fuck it all Sora why did you leave? Why the hell did you leave me alone you ass?" he crashed. His high was already gone and the headache was creeping up fast. "Sora..." he mumbled suddenly calm again." come back..." all the thrashing reopened his wounds and the blood began to mix with the powder and soda. A piece of him died that night, not just his twin brother, but a piece if his sanity; and whatever was left was quickly slipping away already. How was he going to survive without his twin? No drug could replace the pain he felt or the comfort that Sora brought. "I guess this is good bye" he fell asleep in the puddle of blood crank and tears. After all there is just no such thing as longer then forever. So much for forever.