I am fucked.
I am actually fucked.
I am actually royally fucked.
Confused? Don't be. It's rather simple, if you'll allow me to explain. Would you like the short version, or the long-as-all-fucking-hell one?
Long-story-short: I did the unthinkable. Basically what no one should do ever.
I fell for my best friend.
What a fucking brilliant mess I fell into.
Have you ever had something like that happen?
How about when your best friend is the same gender?
Yeah, a tad bit different there, am I right? 'Cause, you see, if you're like me, male, and your best mate is a female, everything could always turn out alright in the end. It's what humans are supposed to do. Boy meets girl. Boy falls in love with girl, vice-versa. Boy and girl continue the human race.
But what about when boy meets boy?
You see, that's one not a whole lot of people think about, or really consider. Now, don't get me wrong, a few do. Quite a few. A lot consider girl meets girl as well, but lets focus on the hetero side here, since that's what a good majority of the world is used to. Hell, evolution made us that way, it's just meant to be. Christ, if I was born two generations ago, hell, maybe even one, I'd be in a bigger fucking pickle than I am now.
And it does not help matters that my best mate just so fucking happens to be the world's greatest - and only - consulting detective, Sherlock fucking-perfect Holmes. (Please excuse me if my language happens to be to much.)
Crucified Christ, with those eyes, and those cheekbones, those curly locks, and Jesus, don't get me started on that neck or that mouth of his.
A lot of people would ask how I could possibly live with the man, let alone fall in love with him, gorgeous or not - he's that insufferable. Trust me, I ask myself that sometimes. But really, all you have to do is witness him in one of his better moments, and you'd understand. Just ask Molly.
And I know technically, it's fine, it's all fine. But you see, it's not really. Not because homosexuality is wrong - hell no. Don't even get me started on that argument. It's the sheer fact that this is Sherlock, the asexual man who's married to his work, whose area isn't girls, nor presumably boys, because his emotional growth is so fucking stunted that he's like a thirteen-year-old.
Actually, I'm extremely thankful he's emotionally stunted, for just this one instance. Otherwise, if he knew, it could ruin everything.
And I'm not willing to take that chance.
I'm not willing to risk everything we have, just because I'm a fucking imbecile.
So would you like the long story now, or are you alright?
