So here it is, a new story floating around and coming out on cyberspace. For any of you who have read Mute, it's finally in the works to be finished. I won't be updating it until I've completed it though. Meanwhile, this is in response to the January WitFit Prompts. Nothing like ushering in the new year with some creative writing...!
Enjoy x
~resolution~
I think I'll write you this letter, and pretend I'll send it. Which I won't, because this is just a game.
I suppose that's what the problem is with me. It's all a game in my eyes – you know, romance. I could blame my upbringing. I could blame my mother. I could blame both my parents, and my sister even. I could tell you it's because I've been brought up to believe there's no such thing as the one (which I still don't think there is), and that romance before you're twenty-five is absurd and ridiculous. I could tell you a lot of things just like that, and hide behind those excuses.
But I don't want to hide behind them, I want to proudly present myself to you, with my excuses, because that's why I am the way I am, and that's why I acted the way I did. You're not the first person I've done this to, but you are the first person I had more than just a crush on. All the others were just teenage fancies. Somewhere along the way with you, though, it got more in depth than a fickle adolescent thing. It took me by surprise, and so I did the thing I do best when it comes to my heart: I ran.
I'm sorry for that. Maybe it will comfort you to know that I'm none the happier because of it. I won't lie however, I managed to achieve what I wanted – protect my heart, and stop liking you. That still doesn't mean I'm happier.
This will sound really dramatic and over the top to you, I'm sure. But I think that's one of the things you liked about me – how intense I was about everything, from my crazy love for my family, to my crazy love for books, and music… So here's a taste of that again.
But I forget, I'm not sending this to you really, so I don't need to apologize how this might sound.
I like someone else now. I suppose I thought of you because I'm running again. Well, not quite yet. But I know that I will.
It's New Year's Day, and the resolution I thought I should make was 'stop running' – but then I laughed, because it's such a laughable idea. I can't stop. And with you, I didn't want to stop.
I hope you're okay, and you've moved on fine. I'm sure you have, because we are eighteen, and everyone moves on rather quickly.
Maybe I will send this letter after all.
Bella
~resolution~
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