Disclaimer: I am not Jk Rowling. If I was I would have made Ron and Hermione get together much sooner but that is beside the point. I ain't her, and I never will be.

Summery: Most groups of close friends have had this conversation, and the marauders are not different. "if you were are member of the opposite sex, which one of us would you choose to date.

The four marauders were all sitting on James' four poster bed.

"So what animal do you think I should be?" asked James

"A stag" said Remus promptly " It is your patronus so it makes sense"

"Yeah, but should I be some sort of wild sexy animal" said James

"Sexy animal?" said Remus raising his eyebrows

"Lily's is a doe" piped in Peter.

"How do you know that"

"Told her yours was a stag, she yelled in dismay and cast hers"

"Stag it is!" said James, looking pleased

"James, did you hear what peter said" asked Sirius

" All I heard was lily and I are meant to be together! Stag and doe." said James

"Where did you hear that" questioned Remus

"I want to be the grim, that is final" said Sirius

"Grim" asked Peter interestedly.

"No wonder you failed divination, the giant black dog"

"I did not fail! I just…didn't pass" Peter said indignantly

Slamming his books down Siriussaid" Lets finish this rubbish tomorrow. I have a more interesting question!"

"What!" Peter yelped.

"If all of us were girls who would you date?"

"No" said Remus flatly

"No way am I answering that!" exclaimed James indigently

"I don't know" said Peter, mulling it over.

"Remus!" cried Serious

They all started at him, each with a different expression. Peter looked as though he was about to burst into a fit of giggles James looked mortified and Remus looked shocked.

"What!" yelled James

"I mean no one!"

"I thought you would have picked me!" James said

"Do you want me to pick you" asked Sirius intrigued

"No, but why Remus?" asked James, now looking a little embarrassed.

"Well, I think he would make a good mother to out children"

Remus sat up, the expression on the face was one of disgust and hilarity. It was really quite funny.

"Our children?" he spluttered "Excuse me but I will not have babies with you."

"Why didn't you pick me? I am good with children; I've had to baby-sit all my brothers and sisters! Plus I don't have a time of month!" Peter said, looking at Sirius with mild indignation.

"Shut up Peter, no one in their right mind would pick you" James said irritably. Peter glared at James

"But Remus can sew and cook and all that other motherly stuff" said Sirius.

"Remus can sew!" yelped James, roaring with laughter.

"And cook" added Peter, laughing so hard he feel of the bed

"Are you calling me gay?" asked Remus, blushing crimson.

"Now just a little bit girly"

"Excuse me but I am a very manly person!"

"Okay Remus, accio some thing heavy and try and lift it. Bet you can't!" James said coolly

"Umm… I'd rather not" said Remus, his whole face going steadily redder.

"I rest my case." Siriussaid flatly "anyway I thought you were madly in love Evans!"

"I am, but if she like dies and asks me to take a lover to make me happy in the ways she can't any more."

"Firstly, how could she tell you that if she was dead and secondly you would chose Sirius to be your lover?" asked Remus pointedly

"Yes." Said James proudly, but he seemed to realize what he had just said "I mean no!"

"Okay, since I told the truth who wants to go next?"

"Erm... I have detention" said Peter and he scurried away

I'm going to go to the library and find out more a bit animagi" said Remus before he left the room.

" Bye" said James and the scampered off.

"Damn it."