Eighteen minutes, not counting typing up the lyrics. Sudden kick to the rear end from my beloved Muse – the demanding, self-righteous… ANYWHO… Rose, Dimitri, Adrian, Christian, Lissa all belong to Richelle Mead's Vampire Academy series; the song, "Keep You", belongs to Sugarland. Enjoy.
We said, 'goodbye', tried a hand at magic
But we couldn't make us disappear
Not a day goes by I don't wish I had you
So in a way I'm glad you're still here
It's a bittersweet victory
Lovin' the ghost in front of me
Rose froze outside the door at the opening lyrics. Unbidden, her mind flashed back to Dimitri. She flinched, remembering him. Trying to stay away… Mason, Tasha… all of the broken hearts that came from it. How much they resisted each other… it wasn't meant to be. She still had him near her, in her heart. Always. There were many things a heart never forgot – true love was one of them. They were soulmates.
It doesn't matter if you were soulmates. He doesn't have a soul to be mated with you, anyway, she scolded herself. She couldn't move, through; she had to listen to the rest of the song.
Now I can't laugh, can't cry
And I can't run, can't hide
What do I gotta do
What do I gotta do to keep you
What do I gotta do to keep you from doing this to me
That was honestly how she felt now. There was no escape. Even Lissa and Christian avoided her, she was so empty. Without Dimitri… even if she did have Adrian, now, he was a poor substitute for Dimitri's fire, Dimitri's love. Even if she had found him and been unable to kill him, being a Strigoi or dead was preferable to this pain.
I wrote a couple of notes one in love, one in anger
They're lying there dying in the dresser drawer
Lived louder than my voice
Struggled through a stranger
He loved me 'til I loved you even more
It's a bittersweet victory
Knowin' someone else wanted me
Even Adrian avoided her now. She was still deeply in love with Dimitri, and every time Adrian tried to win her heart, she fell even more in love with Dimitri. How strong he was, how warm…
She bit her lip to keep from crying out from the pain she felt so often now. She found her cool place, the only place within herself that kept her sane. The place devoid of all emotion; a small price to pay to rid herself of such strong pain.
Now I can't laugh, can't cry
And I can't run, can't hide
You get used to the pain
And numb to the sting
'Til you can't feel anything
And that was where she was. Numb to the pain… used to the sting… it was the only way to escape the soul-shattering, heart-wrenching feeling she got every time she thought of Dimitri. She slid down the wall silently, her fist pressed to her mouth. She didn't even notice the tears coursing down her cheeks.
You tried to explain, but I couldn't hear it
As if your words were my tears
Flowin' freely, warm and quiet
From the edges of my eyes, in my ears
Then all that disappears
She was overcome with grief. She knew no escape. There was no way to just leave her old life behind. Whenever Adrian or Lissa would try to help her, she would end up shutting them down so completely. You don't understand the pain I'm in!! I loved him! He loved me! We were soulmates! Meant for each other!! She couldn't come to terms with the fact…
Now I can't laugh, can't cry
And I can't run, can't hide
Now I can't laugh, can't cry
And I can't run, can't hide
… he was gone.
What do I gotta do
What do I gotta do to keep you
What do I gotta do to keep you from doing this to me
It's nearly midnight. Really, I get inspiration at the oddest times. I've listened to this song god knows how many times, and just under an hour ago it hit me this would be the perfect VA song. So, hope you enjoyed and it wasn't too much crap. Review, if you wish. It really hits you, reading it while listening to the song. You should try it. Peace, lovers.
