"What's wrong with you?" Sirius demanded, glaring at Snape as he downed what had to be his sixth whiskey. Their brief mission, which was to go to a muggle bar to see if anyone had seen Voldemort in those parts, had gone quickly as Snape impatiently shoved his way into their minds to save time. They had finished in record time, without killing each other, as mostly everyone had assumed they would. The problems had only come about when Snape decided he'd have a quick drink. Sirius had gone along and had had one of his own, hoping Snape would follow suite. He had never been more wrong.
"Just having a drink? Like you don't?" Snape asked, the usual glare gone from his face as he asked the question, almost as if he was speaking to a friend and not a sworn enemy. "I told Albus...I told him," Severus brandished his glass with each word, "I told him, don't make me go to a bar...I'm gonna drink if I go to a bar." He explained himself, almost as if Sirius had demanded it.
Sirius nodded curtly, humoring the man. He knew first hand what kind of drunk Severus could be. He had discovered how uncontrollably angry Snape could become, as he had got his arse kicked by the completely inebriated Snape when they were fifteen. Yes, Sirius had learned that letting Snape drink was a horrid idea, as it only brought out the fiercest darkness in the man. Yes, for now he would be a happy drunk, but Sirius was certain that one more drink would send him into angry drunk. Something he did not want to deal with. "Come on, Snape. I'd like to get home."
"Then go." Snape said simply, surprisingly still eloquent despite the vast amounts of alcohol he'd consumed in a frenzied pace. "Or...you could stay and have a drink." Snape offered, already sucking down some Tequila-ridden drink.
"You did not just ask me to have a drink with you." Sirius stated, wondering if he should just leave Snape to his own devices.
"I did." Snape insisted, his eyes widening as he nodded slowly. "You know...you're not as annoying as you used to be."
Sirius gave a huff; Snape was clearly drunk. "You're drunk. You need to come with me so I can take you home." He explained, unable to keep his tone from sounding angry.
"Nah, I'll just drive." Snape brushed him off, waving his drink at him dismissively.
"You're going to drive?" Sirius scoffed. "You're in France! That would take you days!"
"I'll aspirate then." Snape countered easily, looking smug at his 'solution.'
"Keep your voice down." Sirius hissed, looking around to make sure the muggles about them hadn't heard anything. "And you'll splinch yourself if you try!"
"Nah, I got this." Snape insisted, grabbing a shot glass of brown liquid from the skinny bartender and holding it out to Sirius. "Drink up." He insisted.
"Damn it, I said no!" He barked, his frustration increasing when Snape actually looked insulted as if they had been mates and not enemies.
"If you're really in need to go home I can call a taxi and make sure he gets home safe." The bartender offered. "He could always sleep in my bed too." She added, smiling cheekily at Snape who downed the shot he had offered Sirius moments ago.
"See, prolbem solved." He slurred, smirking as he realized his mistake.
"That's very kind of you," Sirius agreed, "But I really need to get him back to his house. He has work tomorrow."
"Well, I'm sick of work." Snape argued. "I hates going to the meetings...asides- I have hours to sober up if I get drunk."
"You are drunk!" Sirius hissed, wishing Remus was there as the werewolf was always able to make people see reason.
A pained look crossed Snape's face. "I'm not a drunk...my fathers is a drunk." Snape looked legitimately put out.
"I said you are drunk not that you're a drunk." Sirius sighed, running a hand through his hair.
"I only haved a few." Snape insisted, still looking forlorn.
"Please- I would like to get home." Sirius tried again, hoping Snape would give in to a plea. Sirius didn't mind begging now as Snape would never remember it in the morning. Not with the way he was throwing back another shot of something.
"Then go." Snape frowned and rested his head in his hand, his eyes glossy. "I was goin to calls a truce with you tonight, when we were alone..." Snape trailed off, clearly unfocused.
"What?" Sirius sank into a seat beside Snape at the bar, figuring he'd might was well get as much information off the usual secretive Snape while he could.
"A truce...I'm tired of fighting." Snape whispered, the smell of whiskey surrounding him.
"With me?" Sirius asked, thinking that was why Snape had chosen to ignore his barbs lately, instead of returning them.
"No!" Snape yelled, looking frustrated. "With eveyone..." The frown deepened. "But I have too."
"What are you going on about?" Sirius demanded, suddenly curious.
"I just have to be..."
"If you have to fight with everyone, why are you trying to make a truce with me?"
"Cause I don't want to have to anymore." Snape insisted, clearly thinking he was making perfect sense. "Can we truce...it'll be secret." He whispered nowhere near quietly.
"I will truce you, sure." Sirius agreed, knowing that Snape would forget this had happened. Afterall, Sirius never made truces he didn't intend to keep, and he simply did not want to form a real truce with Snape. "But only if you agree to leave with me, okay?"
"I gots to pee first." Snape drawled, before moving to stand on the feet he hadn't used since drinking. Anticipating what would happen, as Sirius had been drunk several times since and during his youth, he stuck on an arm to keep the man from smashing into the bar. Sirius smirked, it had been rare that he was on the other side of this- usually Remus or James had been forced to take care of him, seldom did he find it necessary to return the favor. "I think my legs are broked."
Sirius shook his head and pulled Snape toward the men's room, hoping that once he shoved Snape into a stall he'd be able to handle the rest. As much as he hated the man he wasn't going to let him piss himself in public. "You're legs aren't broken, I promise." He assured, trying hard to be civil as perhaps then it would be easier to coax Severus to leave. Sirius didn't really want to use force- not with someone who was drunk anyways. "Here." Sirius kicked the door open, grateful he didn't need to use a handle as his hands were full of Snape. He was almost certain if he let go, Snape would crumple to the floor. Gently as he was able he wrestled Snape into a stall and closed the door. He stood in front of the stall, knowing Snape was too drunk to lock it. He waited patiently, until the lack of sound alerted Sirius to the fact that Snape had yet to even pee. "Can you handle it?" He demanded.
"Yeah...but I can't unbutton myself...I simply can't." Snape sounded deeply ashamed.
"If I unbutton them, can you do the rest?"
"Yesh." Snape slurred as Sirius opened the stall to reveal Snape standing with both arms pressed against the stall walls.
"Are you sure?" Sirius snapped, unbuttoning the trousers.
"Yep, I got this." Snape promised, removing one hand from the wall. Sirius quickly left, sadly not fast enough to escape a glimpse of Snape who was apparently well-endowed. Snape owed him for this. Snape owed him big time. He waited a good five minutes before daring to enter the stall. Snape for his part, had managed to get his pants back up, however they remained unbuttoned and Sirius cursed under his breath as he fixed them.
"Come on." Sirius ordered, yanking Snape to his feet. He maneuvered Snape, with great difficulty, so that his arm was around his shoulder.
"Thank you..." Snape panted, looking to be in a great deal of pain or turmoil.
"Are you alright?" Sirius asked, his tone going softer.
Snape nodded, even though his face gave away the lie. "I miss Lily..." He whispered, so softly that Sirius almost didn't hear it. His gut heaved at the admission. Not a day went by that he didn't miss James and Lily.
"Me too." Sirius managed, unsure of how to respond to Snape showing emotion.
"I'm sorry." Snape insisted, his head drooping unto Sirius's shoulder as he walked them out the bathroom. "I didn't want anyone to die...not even James."
Sirius stopped walking, feeling like he had been punched in the heart. Snape had just admitted that he hadn't wanted James to die...Snape did not say things like that. Snape was mean and snarky. Snape was evil. Which made it okay to terrorize him. Snape did not have emotions like this. He simply didn't. But drunk people didn't lie, and Sirius found himself nodding. "Thank you." He offered, not knowing what else he could say.
"Didn't want you locked up in Abzakaban, either." Snape insisted, drooling unto his shoulder. "Not when we knew you was innocent."
"Who knew I was innocent?" Sirius demanded, his tone soft despite the turmoil within.
"Abus." Snape said simply.
He felt betrayed, Albus had known of his innocence? "He knew?"
"I wasn't supposed to tell you, but I don't think its fair you got locked up in the dark...I hate the dark, I hate it so much. They kept me in the basement..."
Sirius was unsure of anything at the moment, and he wanted nothing more than to go and get Remus and confront Albus. But he knew that he should take advantage of the situation and get more out of Snape. "Who?"
"My parents...it was always so cold...so dark..." Snape's face screwed up in a mixture of rage and hurt. "I hate drunks...I don't want to be like my father!" He yelled suddenly, deafening Sirius with the sound. "I don't want to be a child beater!"
"What?" Sirius was stunned silent, why the hell was Snape so talkative? Surely it wasn't just the alcohol prompting him into this friendliness, but then again he had had close to a dozen drinks or more.
"She's use her wand on me and he'd...he'd use his cane." Snape whispered. "They dunk me in the water..."
"Er...it's okay." Sirius promised, trying to distract the man. "Hey, why don't we go back to my place, hmm? Just get you a nice cup of coffee?"
"Got any firewhiskey to put into it?"
Sirius smirked. "I hope you realize how Gryffindor you sound right now."
"That hat wanted to put me in wif the lions." Snape drawled, nearly incomprehensible. "Only for a second..."
Sirius nodded, concentrating on getting themselves out of the bar and into a dark alley so he could appirate back to Grimmauld place.
"Hey! You need to get his greasy arse out of here!' A large man yelled, clearly annoyed as Snape had tripped over one of his meaty feet.
"We're going." Sirius snapped. Luckily for that man he had an arm full of spy, or else he would have gotten in the man's face.
"Hey, don't you talk to me like that?" The large man hissed, clearly showing off the women flocked around his table.
"Or what...you gonna hit me?" Snape spat, still quick with the jabs despite the inebriation. "Damn ogre."
Sirius tensed up as the man rose from his chair. Leave it to Snape to still pick fights where he was sure to get his arse handed to him. "Look, we're leaving." Sirius was in no mood to fight.
"Not yet, you aren't." The man swung quickly, catching Sirius in the jaw. Cursing he felt Snape stagger away from him. He had just socked the beast in the chin when Snape went mad. Sirius found himself drawing back in fear as Snape turned on kill-mode. With a ferociousity he had never seen Snape posses, the man wailed on the large man.
"Hey, hey!" Sirius quickly jumped a man who went at Snape. As a Gryffindor there was simply no way Sirius was going to let an unfair fight unfold- at least not when it involved somebody with whom he was on good terms for now.
Sirius was doing all he could to hold his own, when the sound of electricity filled the room and several woman screamed. He got to his feet, only to find Snape and the ogre on the floor, shaking violently. "What the hell?" He demanded, looking at the bartender who was still pointing some object at the two.
"It's just a tazer- they're fine." She snapped, her eyes ablaze as she glared around the room, instantly regaining control of the crowd. "You take your friend, and you get out of here." She added, her tone slightly softer as she picked up a phone to dial the police.
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"I'm sorry." Snape moaned, blood dripping from his lip. "I got you in trouble and now you'll never get that tarbender's number."
"I'll live." Muttered Sirius, yanking Snape into an alley. "You didn't poke into my mind tonight, did you?" Normally he would have jumped to conclusions, but he decided just once to give Snape the benefit of a doubt.
"No, but I seen you looking at her..." Snape actually smiled. "Constant vigilance." He mimed, bursting into a peal of laughter.
"Alright, I'm going to appirate. Hang tight."
Sirius struggled to maintain his grip on Snape as he landed within Grimmauld Place, it only became harder as Snape seemed to have forgotten how to work his damn legs. "Alright, I'm going to need you to use your legs." He said exasperation creeping into his voice.
"Sirius?" Remus called from the living room. "Is someone with you?"
"Yes, and I could actually use a bit of help." He yelled, hoping Remus would offer to get Snape home.
Sirius waited patiently for Remus to come, and he nearly smirked at the look on Remus's face when he realized Snape was drunk.
"Have you been drinking?" Remus demanded, going to Snape's other side and throwing Snape's other arm over his shoulder.
"No, Snape had been. Quite a lot actually." He snapped, before giving Remus and apologetic look.
"He reeks of it! How much did he have?" He questioned, concern in his eyes.
"A lot." Sirius responded. "I'm almost positive he could drink me under the table."
Remus raised a brow at the compliment. "I take it Severus is a friendly drunk?"
"For the most part. He did offer up a truce...right before he attacked some muggle arse."
Remus bit his lip. "I take it that's why you two are bleeding?"
"Oh my goodness!" Molly jumped up from her spot on the couch when the two of them drug Snape in. "What's happened?"
"Snape's drunk." Sirius said simply, walking Snape over to an empty chair- one of the few places not being occupied by a Weasley.
"Nah, I only had one drunk." Snape insisted, lifting his head up to look Molly straight in the eye.
"You got him drunk?" Ron demanded, a grin on his face as he looked at his professor.
"No, he did that all on his own." Sirius assured, shoving Snape down into a chair.
"No, it's not like that." Snape argued, throwing a hand into the air for dramatic purposes. "I only had one drunk."
"I'll go and get some coffee." Arthur offered, heading off to the kitchen with a clearly amused look on his face.
"Put some whiskeyfire in it!" Snape called after him, before turning to Molly with a conversation look on his face. "I got tazered."
"Tazered?" Molly asked, looking to Sirius for explanation.
"It's how muggles stun other muggles." Hermione offered, clearly shocked at seeing the most strict professor sloshed.
"Ogre started it." Snape insisted, slouching down in the chair.
"Yes, but you calling him an ogre didn't really help things." Sirius offered.
"He's totally sloshed!" The twins laughed, shrinking back when Molly gave them a firm look.
"I am not drinked! I only had a few to drunk and Sirius took my wand so I couldn't aspirate." Snape defended himself as valiantly as a drunk could.
"You couldn't 'aspirate?'" Ginny asked, hiding a smile.
"No." Snape shook his head. "He took my wand...I said I was gonna drive but he wouldn't let me."
"Where were you going to get a car?" Sirius humored.
"That's what's not important." Snape slurred. "What's is important is that, my feet aren't actually broken."
"Here dear, drink some of this." Molly took the coffee from Arthur and pressed it into Snape's hands.
"Does it has achol?"
"Sure." Molly nodded, patting his shoulder as Snape took a big gulp of the steaming coffee.
"That's hot." Snape said simply, before dropping the cup into his lap.
Sirius winched along with the other males in the room as the steaming liquid spread all over Snape's sensitive area, but Snape seemed unaffected to the pain.
"I didn't taste no acol." He accused, before turning to look straight at Harry. Understandbly the boy flinched. "I'm sorry you're aunt is such a bitch..."
Harry blinked. "What?"
"Your aunt, Penutia, is a horrid bitch." Snape insisted. "She was soooo awful to your mother."
"You knew my mother?" Harry asked looking confused and amused at the same time.
"Yesh, we were best mates since we was kids...but I fucked up that didn't I?" Snape was clearly somewhere in between happy and sad, and Sirius sincerely hoped he wouldn't get angry again. "I'm sorry, Potter." Snape shook his head. "You're arent your father completely, you got to be some of her..."
"How much did he have to drink?" Remus demanded, pulling his wand out and using an alcohol content reading spell. His eyes widened with most of the rooms when it indicated he was .24. "Severus, do you know where you are right now?"
"Not really..." Snape admitted, unbothered by the fact.
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Remus raised his wand closer to Severus's face. "Do you know your BAC is .24?"
Severus actually smirked. "That's a lot of drinks." Snape nodded. "Must be a record."
Remus frowned. "And you don't have to throw up?"
"Nope." Snape looked sure. "You should drank...Sir..Sirus wouldn't won't." Snape stood up, despite Remus's attempt to keep his seated. "Even after I offered a truce."
"Did you offer the truce before of after you were drunk?" Remus asked, pushing Severus back into the chair.
"I was intending to do it afore." Snape looked sad. "But I got drank. I told Albus, I said 'don't make me go to a bar.' But he said I had too. I told him I was going to drink...but he never listens!"
"Alright." Remus held his hands up, backing away from Severus as his face turned red.
"I says, I said to him...how can you put the boy backs with that bitch even though she's a bitch? And he says, "it's for the great good.'" Snape was ranting, clearly enraged at Albus for something. "I said, how can the wards work if shes a bitch...send him to Black's, but he says 'no'! It's not his plan."
Remus furrowed his brows as the room went dead silent. "What do you mean?"
"They...don't treat him right but Albus says he gots to go back for his plan to work." Severus spoke slow, as if Remus were feeble-minded.
"What plan?" Sirius asked, a protective hand on his godson's shoulder.
"Not supposed to say anything..." Snape whispered.
"Why not?" Remus asked gently.
"Albus will get angry with me again..." Severus's eyes widened with fear.
"Has Albus gotten angry with you before?" Arthur asked.
Snape nodded. "I told Minerva things I wasn't supposed to." He whispered, looking around as if he expected the wizard to suddenly appear.
"And what...what did Albus did?" Molly asked.
"Made me feel bad..." Snape trailed off a frown on his face.
"What...what plan does he have for Harry?" Sirius asked again, a slight edge in his voice.
"I am not supposed to say." Snape looked torn and Remus seriously wondered how he could be functioning this well.
"But I thought we truced?" Sirius was quick to manipulate an answer from the drunken man and Remus refrained from calling him out on the Slytherin behavior.
"We did..." Snape nodded. "So I tell you." He nodded, leaning over the arm of the chair to look at Hermione who sat on the edge of the couch. "He knew you was innocent, and keeps you in prion." Clearly the talk was not directed at Hermione. "I calls him on it..and he says he cant have you interfere with his plans yet..." Severus was quickly getting closer to passing out.
"When..when did you call him out?" Sirius demanded.
"When Lily's die." Snape choked out, tears falling down his red face. "I wants to know so I could who was responible."
"Why...why would you vouch for me?" Sirius demanded, clearly on edge about this revelation.
"Cause..wasn't fair...didn't hate you enough." Snape struggled to explain, wiping at his face with a fist.
"What...else can you tell me?" Remus asked, Severus.
"Harry didn't have to be boy who lived...longbotton could." Severus slurred. "I'm sorry." He insisted, desperately.
"Whatever for?" Remus asked, wondering where this train of thought was going.
"Abus says my fault they died...all my fault..." Severus whispered, before burying his face in his hands.
"Pettigrew was the one who betrayed them. Not you." Remus insisted, speaking loudly over the sobs.
"I shouldn't not have heard prophecy." Snape choked, still refusing to look up.
"You heard the prophecy. Yes." Remus nodded. "But you reported it back to Albus right away didn't you?"
"I begged...I begged Dark Lord...he said he let her live...he killed her...no reason too...all this killing." Snape's voice was getting increasingly aggravated and thick. "I don't want to do this anymore...I do it for her..."
"And what a good way to repay her." Remus soothed, wondering how long Snape could keep from passing out.
"I didn't wants to become death eater...mother took me to him..." Snape looked up at Sirius, his face a mess with tears. "Have no choice to continue..." Snape shook his head. "I'm sorry Regulus died...and Alice and Frank and Lily and even James...everyones gona die this war...he just keeps coming and coming and-" Snape broke off, attempting to stand.
"You need to sit back down." Molly said firmly.
"I have to pee." Snape protested, looking insulted.
"Can you even walk?" Molly demanded, an amazed look on her face as Severus managed to take a few steps.
"I can." Snape drawled, stumbling slightly as he stood. "Which way?" He asked, looking confused.
"Here." Remus grabbed ahold of him, ready to lead him into the bathroom, when Snape simply passed out and fell to the floor.
