Mandy was on her way home from school. She decided to walk rather than take the bus because she knew if she saw Karen's smug little face one more time that day she'd have snuck into the Jackson house and ripped her earrings out in her sleep.
While passing through one of the sketchier parts of town, she looked up at the loft where Mickey usually went to shoot things and be his little rage monster self, but rather than hearing the usually metallic ring of gunshots and seeing his silhouette against the sky, she saw someone slumped over.
"Oh shit...," she said, assuming that Mickey had finally pissed off the wrong person. "Oh shit, Oh shit, Oh shit…"
She raced up the dilapidated staircase to the roof and right when she reached the door she heard something. Figuring it might be the asshole that shot Mickey, she put her ear against the door to listen while palming the butterfly knife in her jean skirt. But rather than hearing walking, or gloating or a reloading gun, she just heard what sounded like crying.
Knife in hand, she cautiously opened the door, checking for any signs of danger before stepping out into the light. She was shocked to see that there wasn't anyone there but Mickey. Mickey was crying.
He was so absorbed in the moment, he barely noticed her there until she said something.
"Mick?" she uttered while taking a few cautious steps closer.
Finally the illusion was shattered and Mickey snapped back into awareness. Realizing who was there, he quickly turned, wiped his face off and tried to give his best attempt at feigned normalcy. "Yeah, what's up tits for brains?"
"Cut the shit," she said seriously.
"Fuck off!," he yelled, flipping her off simultaneously. She walked up right behind him and after a quick glance to ensure the pistol he always carried was out of reach, she sat down in front of him. Despite his best efforts, his cheeks were still scarlet and damp, his voice was nasally and stuffed up. It was apparent he'd be crying.
He didn't say anything and didn't make eye contact. She just stared at him in disbelief that her brother, the guy who people feared would burn their house down or beat them senseless, was crying. Trying to be as sensitive as Milkovichly possible she put a hand on his knee and shoved him slightly, "What's got you like this? "
Silence.
She tried again, "Look Mick, I'm not gonna leave until you tell me who or what's got you like this so I can go have Joey break some legs."
That elicited a very slight smirk and a witty comeback, "Joey? Please did you learn nothing growing up? Iggy's the best at breaking legs." He still staunchly avoided eye contact.
Feeling like she'd gotten through, she playfully shoved his shoulder before sitting next to him on the old crate. "Come on, just tell me."
She noticed Mickey biting his lip and messing around with his hands. This was bad. After about a minute of silence, Mickey hung his head low and choked out, "I can't."
She grabbed his chin and forced him to look at her. His eyes were sopped with tears and he still wouldn't look at her.
"What are you conflicted about being a dad or some shit?"
He didn't answer and stared out at the rooftop. Mandy wasn't sure how to proceed from there so he just kind of sat in silence with him for about 10 minutes.
Finally, he took a deep breath to try and recompose himself and then spoke without taking his eyes off the horizon.
"You know Ian?"
Shocked to hear him speak Mandy struggled to process what he'd just said. "Gallagher?"
"Yeah."
"Yeah what about him? I thought we agreed you wouldn't hurt him since he's my friend now."
He looked down, "Will you please just shut up and let me finish?"
"Jeez, sorry."
His voice quivered as he spoke, "He…..and I….were…together."
Mandy couldn't believe what she was hearing. Mickey and Ian were together? More importantly, Mickey was gay?
"Wait…what?!" She said in disbelief as he sighed loudly signaling for her to stop talking.
He continued, "We were….together..since….he came to get that pistol back." He paused, fighting back the tears with each word.
"Remember when I got shot by Kash?...that was why."
"Holy shit, Mickey I'm…" she said apologetically while nudging closer, but he cut her off once again.
"Anyways…..Dad caught me."
Silence. Mandy began to piece it together in her head. The pistol whipping, Mickey and Ian always hanging out, Ian asking her how to know if a guy likes you, all of it. It fit together like a fucking puzzle. She didn't know what to say or do to comfort him other than just lean up against him like they did when they were kids and Terry came home high on meth.
"Then…," Mickey started. Mandy couldn't imagine what could be worse than Terry catching Mickey and Ian fucking. Like that was literally the worst thing that could have happened, though she wondered how Ian had gotten out alive.
"Then, he called Ochsana."
Mandy's eyes widened. "Wait as in Ochsana, the one who's pregnant with your baby Ochsana?"
Mickey nodded and held his head in his hands.
"Dad made her fuck me. He made Ian watch. I tried to fight him to let Ian get out, I tried." He started sobbing. "He couldn't even look at me. He couldn't do it ."
Mandy was shocked. She sat and thought for a second before saying, "You're not the only one."
This jarred Mickey out of his tears and made him finally look at her, look at his sister. "What the fuck do you mean I'm not the only one?"
Mandy sighed and broke eye contact. "Remember when I was pregnant last year and everyone thought it was Ian's? It wasn't"
A look of absolute horror formed on Mickey's face.
"It…..was dad's."
Mickey couldn't believe what he was hearing. Terry had raped not only him, but Mandy too? He stood up with his hands on his temples and paced back and forth on the small roof.
"What the fuck is wrong with us?" he screamed at the sky before noticing Mandy was crying now too. Putting his own troubles aside he walked up to her, knelt down and grabbed her shoulders, making eye contact.
"Look Mand, that's all dad. All of this is dad. He's the fucking scum of the earth. Fuck!" He slammed his fists against the ground.
A few hours passed and they both were watching the sunset. Mandy broke the silence.
"He loves you, you know, Ian."
Mickey didn't say anything.
"I didn't know he was talking about you, but all he used to talk about was this guy he was seeing, this guy who he wondered whether liked him back."
Mickey looked down and a tear formed in the corner of his eye.
"You don't have to go through with this, Mick, sell a gun, get some cash, take her to a clinic." She grabbed him by the shoulders and turned him towards her. "You hear me?!"
He sighed, "Yeah, yeah I do. I have to though."
She slapped him across the face, "Wake up fuckface! Illinois is about to pass gay marriage. The world's not the asshole, it's Terry."
He looked at her and said through a half-sob, "You don't know that! You don't know what it's like!"
She looked him squarely in the eye, "You unhappy with the way the world is? Then fucking change it pussy. Just admit it."
"Admit what?"
"You know fucking well what."
"I love him" he whispered before just staring into the distance.
Mandy hugged him, "Mick, of the brothers, I hate you the least." She chuckled.
He smirked back at her before turning serious, "You tell ANYONE that I cried and I'll cut your tits off in your sleep."
She punched him, "You tell anyone I cried and you can say goodbye to your balls, assface"
"Fucktwat"
