YUGIOH Short Play made by Seto Kaiba

[Curtains pull open to reveal a dark stage. A solitary light turns on revealing a figure dressing in some old ancient Egypt costume standing there. He speaks.]

Yami: Long ago...*speaks dramatically* when the pyramid was still young. Egyptian Kings play a game of great and terrible power but these shadow games erupted into a war that threaten to destroy this entire world. Until a brave and powerful pharaoh lock the magic away imprisoning it with mystical millennium items. Now five thousand years later, a boy named Yugi unlocks the secret of the millennium puzzle. He is infused with ancient magical energy for destiny has chosen him to defend the world from the return of the shadow game just as the brave pharaoh did five thousand years-

Seto: No. NO. CUT!

[Main lights come up. Jou runs beside Seto who walks toward the centre of the stage, glaring at Yami.]

Seto: What the fuck was that Yami?

Yami: I...what...

Seto: I'll tell you what that was, it was CRAP! What kind of bullshit lines were those? Shadow magic, does it even makes freaken sense? What's with the whole 5000 years thingy? You don't even look fifty...

Yami: I...I was just saying the lines...

Jou: Err...Seto?

Seto: WHAT PUP!

[Jou pouts at the nickname and gives Seto the script]

Jou: Those really WERE Yam's lines.

[Seto's eyes briefly scanned through them before he tossed the script over his shoulder]

Seto: Well the scipt is CRAP! Who wrote this magic bullshit?

Anzu: I did...and it's NOT bullshit!

[Everyone look at the angry girl who looks like she wants to murder the director]

Seto: It is stupid if I say it's stupid! Get your crap out of here!

Anzu: Why you-!

Seto: Why don't you missy go and sook somewhere else. I have a show to direct. Yami!

Yami: What now Seto?

Seto: This script sucks so I'm going to throw this trash out, improvise the first bits.

Yami: WHAT! I freaken had to memorise those freaken lines for a freaken whole week!

Seto: Sucks to be you.

Anzu: You can't just throw my script out!

Seto: I can do whatever I please. I AM THE DIRECTOR! Yami! GO!

[Yami glares at Seto and walks back to his spot]

Seto: Okay...why are the main lights still on!

Marik: *speaks through speaker* Oops!

[Main lights dim out and solitary light back on]

Seto: *mumbles to himself* Stupid, psycho light...ACTION!

Yami: ...err...5000 years ago...a

Seto: CUT!

[Main lights back on]

Seto: What don't you fucking understanding about throwing the fucking script out the fucking windows and fucking improvising the lines?

Jou: Err...maybe you should try and calm down first...

Seto: Shut up! Honda and Otogi!

[Two men comes onto the stage]

Seto: I want to change the entire scene, take the stupid pyramid out.

Honda: Do you know how long it took us to create this scene?

Seto: Does my face look like it gives a shit?

[Honda and Otogi grumbles under their breathe and took the pyramid out]

Yami: So Seto...? Where EXACTLY is the direction of this play going?

Seto: It's always me who has to come up with everything!

Jou: You are the director...and you did change the whole play.

Seto: Shut up mutt. *Grumbles and doodles on the paper* The play is now about um...*a imaginary light bulb pops in his head* I got it! Sleeping Beauty! It's tragic plus romantic! *Gives Jou the paper*

Jou: We're supposed to create a new play not copyright...

Seto: We're not copying pup...we don't wear those fancy frilly clothes!

Anzu: Your destroying my whole creative genius of my work!

Seto: Your work was creative crap! We are done with it, we are doing this now. Action!

[Lights go out]

Yami: Err...Seto?

Seto: CUT! WHAT!

[Lights go on]

Yami: Who exactly am I?

Seto: Fuck my life, all actors on stage now!

[Yugi, Ryou, Bakura enters]

Seto: That's all our actors?

Jou: Yup!

Seto: Fine, you!

Bakura: Me?

Seto: Uh-huh, who do you play?

Bakura: I'm the tomb robber that wants the pharaoh dead...

Seto: Not anymore you're not. Now, you are Sleeping Beauty! And Yami the prince!

Bakura/Yami: WHAT!

Yami: Why can't aibou be my princess...?

Bakura: I don't want to be a stupid girl.

Seto: And you *points to Yugi* You can be the fairies.

Yugi: What? ALL OF THEM?

Seto: *ignores Yugi and turns to Ryou* That makes you the witch.

Ryou: I...okay.

Seto: Good with this out of the way, we can finally start!

Bakura: Eh...

Seto: What now?

Bakura: I have no idea what is a sleeping beauty...

Seto: HOW CAN YOU NOT KNOW WHAT IS SLEEPING BEAUTY! DOESN'T YOUR MOM READ BEDTIME STORIES TO YOU!

Bakura: No.

[Silence]

Seto: Make your lines up! Do whatever the fuck you want! Just keep to the storylines!

[Otogi and Honda enters]

Otogi: We have a few problems...

Seto: What?

Honda: We don't have the proper props for the new stage show.

Otogi: Yeah all we have is pretty much leathers, chains and duel monster cards.

Seto: Why is chains involve in the prop?

Otogi: Well Yami suggest we add that in...

Yami: Hee hee...*Yugi looks away with a blushing face*

Seto: Screw the props. These four are top actors right? They can act like they have props.

Honda: But all their costumes are all wrong for their role! Why are the witch and fairies dresses in uniforms?

Seto: Honda...

Honda: Yeah?

Seto: I DON'T FUCKEN CARE!

Malik: *speak through speaker* Does this mean Marik and I have to change the light and sound system.

Seto: Yeah yeah, just go with your instinct and adds tragic romantic music too! Can we start now? Start with the party scene!

[Curtains opens and lights dims]

*Bakura being shoved inside his a box with his head being stuck out, acting likes a baby*

Yugi 1: My gift for you princess is the gift of beauty; you will be the most beautiful girl in this land.

Yugi 2: Well my gift would be the gift of song, you will be gifted with a wondrous voice and every bird will die when they hear you sing.

Yugi 3: And my gift shall be...

[Smokes appears]

Ryou: MUHAHAHAHAH! How dare you all did not invite me to this party, I shall curse the princess for your disrespect-

Seto: CUT!

[Main lights go on]

Seto: What the fuck Ryou? You curse the princess just because you weren't invited to the party? That's just lame, cut that out!

Ryou: But Seto, that's how the story goes...

Seto: What! That wasn't how my mom told me but anyway it makes the witch sound like a totally douche bag, I don't like it, cut it out and retake!

[Lights dim, Ryou enters]

Ryou: I shall curse the princess because I am a witch and it's not like I totally care about this party.

[Ryou exits and 100 mistakes later]

Seto: Okay this is it! Last scene!

Yami: Err...Seto we have a problem...

Seto: Now what would that be?

Yami: Well you see, at end of sleeping beauty, the prince kisses the princess...

Seto: So...?

Bakura WHAT! EWW! PISS OFF!

Yami: My thoughts exactly.

Seto: Would you two do it if I buy you a brand new car?

Yami: Hmm...tempting.

Bakura: NO!

Seto: How about a brand new mansion?

Yami: Super tempting.

Bakura: Fucking no.

Seto: Err...what about hot steamy sex with your hikaris for a week at my mansion?

Bakura: Fuck-

Yami: Fuck off Bakura, I'm taking this offer.

Bakura: I was going to say yes...

Yugi: HEY!

Ryou: Don't we get a say in this!

Seto: I give you two ticket passes to anywhere you want to go.

Yugi: HURRAY!

Ryou: Bakura hurry up and kiss Yami!

Bakura: This is so gross.

Yami: Excuse me? You should feel privilege of having to get a kiss by me...

Bakura: Only when I'm blind.

Ryou: Well, you're technically half blind, since you be sleeping most of the time.

Bakura: You know what Ryou? I am gonna fucken screw you so hard that-

Seto: Hey! We are keeping this to NC-17 rated.

Bakura: Fuck off Seto.

[Finally after 20 retakes of trying to get kiss scene...since every time Yami's face went closer to Bakura he kept on laughing and Yugi threaten him that if laugh one more time then he will have to go on a date with Anzu]

Seto: Finally! My super genius work! You saw that bitch, that's what you called 'creative'.

[Anzu fell asleep with her script on top of her face]

Seto: She fell asleep-Whatever! Your opinion does not mater anyway, I am gonna go and celebrate my play success! Everyone back here again tomorrow for practice!

[Everyone groans and he left the room]

Yugi: Does everyone agree with me that this play is going to be a disaster?

[All hands rose up]

Yugi: Yup, we're screw.


Haha sorry for this weird story, I was bored xD And I was imagining what would happen if Seto was the director =D LOL.