A/N: Okay so this is my first fic so bear with me. Feel free to give me any constructive criticism you have though! Also this is vaguely inspired by a song by Paralysed Age called Bloodsucker (hence the title) and if you like goth music or rock you should check it out. Here's the link for people interested: watch?v=1xQ5XyVJtTE
Dan had lived with Phil for 5 years and he's never seen him act like this. He's going out late and coming back even later. Dan may have a terrible sleep schedule but he definitely didn't miss this. He's been acting weird and avoiding questions as well. And worst of all Dan thinks he's even been lying to him. He's never been like this not once since Dan had met him. Not even when they had a rough patch in their relationship all those years ago. Dan could do nothing except expect the worst. That Phil was cheating on him. He wanted to know why. What had he done to make him cheat? He had thought their relationship was going great. But evidently, Phil thought otherwise. The thought tore him apart, but what other explanation was there?
He let the thought swim around in his head for weeks, unsure about what to do about it, until he finally decided. He wouldn't confront Phil about it, because if it was the truth he would just deny it. No, he would have to catch Phil in the act. Dan had come to the conclusion that the only logical way to get Phil to admit to cheating was to follow him to wherever he goes at night. He just had to choose when. Well, no time like the present, right?.
That night, he went to sleep like normal, laying down with Phil. Tonight, however, he waited until Phil had gotten out of bed and he heard their front door close. Then, he got dressed and left. As he stepped out of their flat, he looked around to see which direction Phil had gone. Noticing Phil walking away from town, Dan quietly set off behind him, making sure his footsteps were virtually silent and that he kept his distance.
Phil didn't seem to notice Dan walking behind him. Either Dan was doing a decent job at keeping silent or Phil was just too intent on getting where he was going to hear Dan's footsteps. Dan figured it was probably the latter. Phil certainly didn't notice him as he walked into an alley.
Aha, Dan thought, I've got you now. He still kept his distance though, he wanted to catch Phil fully red handed. Where he would have absolutely no excuse. In his mind, Phil breaking up with him would have been better than him cheating. The fact that Phil has been cheating on him was bad enough, but knowing that he wouldn't have come clean if he had confronted him was almost worse in a way. Because of that, Dan had to do this.
As he finally approached the alley Phil had gone into, he heard vague noises. Not the noises he was expecting though, they sounded almost… pained? He brushed it off and continued towards the alley. When he finally entered the alley, what he saw was definitely nothing near what he had been mentally preparing himself for the whole walk here. The first thing he was met with was a terrified set of eyes who caught his. Dan didn't understand what was happening. Why were they so scared? The next thing he was met with, still frozen in the person's gaze, was the smell. The pungent metallic smell. Even if you haven't smelt it before, it's unmistakeable; the smell of blood. The scene clicked into place in Dan's mind when he finally tore his eyes away from the girl and to Phil. Or, at least what he thought was Phil. It was wearing Phil's clothes, but its face was grotesque, no longer fully resembling that of a human. He then realized that this girl was dying. And this thing was killing her.
He watched as the girl struggled weakly, as it was all he could do. He was frozen to the spot. Besides, it's not like he could've done much to help her. It was too late. His eyes were glued to the scene as the girl's struggling became weaker and weaker, until it stopped completely and her eyes glazed over, still frozen in the expression of fear. The creature (Phil? He still wasn't sure) dropped the body to the ground and wiped its mouth of the blood that was dripping down. Just as its face reverted back to reveal that it was indeed Phil that had murdered that girl, Dan seemed to be released from his terror- driven malfunction and he began to run.
Where would he run to though? He had nowhere to go. It was too late at night, there was no chance anywhere was open and he certainly couldn't go to his friend's house with a story like this. They'd think he was mental. He had nowhere to go except for the flat. He knew that Phil would inevitably go home too, but he didn't have another choice. Oh God. Did he see me? Would he kill me like he killed that girl? Dan thought in his panic. Surely he wouldn't hurt Dan, but he did know what he was now. He ran as fast as he could to their flat, dreading Phil's return
Phil hadn't noticed Dan until it was too late. Dan had seen him for what he really is. How was he going to explain this? And why was Dan even following him in the first place? Phil sighed, looking down at the body at his feet. He didn't want Dan to find out this way, but now it's just going to be one big mess to try to resolve this. He decided to let Dan have a bit of space. It probably wouldn't be wise to go after him just yet. He still needed to get away from the body though, so he began walking in the opposite direction of the flat. He would come back and talk to Dan later.
The walk really did give Phil some time to think. He had a plan of what he was going to say, though he figures that he'll forget that plan as soon as he opens the door. But he also had time to think about the alley. Maybe it was for the best Dan had seen him. Dan knew what he was now, and that's a good thing. Phil didn't like lying to Dan, and he wanted to tell him he just hadn't found the right time. And with Dan seeing him like that there was no way Dan could sugar coat it in his brain and just avoid the fact that he has to kill people. Yeah, Phil thought, it really is for the best that he saw that.
When Phil got to the flat, Dan noted that he didn't seem surprised to see him sitting in the lounge.
"Hey Phil, what were you doing out so late?" Dan said, trying to play off the fact that he saw what he did. Phil sighed, not buying into Dan's attempt at being calm.
"I know you saw me, Dan."
"Saw what?" He tried again.
"Dan. Please. Just stop. I saw you there in the alley. I saw your expression and I want to explain." Dan rolled his eyes.
"Fine, yes I saw you. But how are you going to explain that? You killed someone Phil! And what the hell happened to your face? Just what are you, Phil?"
"That's what I'm trying to explain. Okay so… Oh god I really did not want to do this just yet." He looked away, seemingly searching for words. "Alright. So, uh… I'll just come out and say it I guess. I'm uh… I'm a vampire. So there's that."
"A vampire? But those don't exist. That's not possible. It can't be possible." Dan said, shaking his head as if trying hard enough will make it not real.
"What do you think that was in the alley then? I just gave her a real bad hickey and she dies? I didn't think they existed either until I got attacked. I didn't want you to find out like this, but at least you didn't have to find out the same way I did." Dan sighed, and he looked away from Phil. Phil had a point, at least he hadn't been turned. That didn't make this whole situation any better though.
"No I had to find out by watching my fucking boyfriend of 6 years killing an innocent girl. I can't exactly say that's any less traumatizing." Dan was getting mad now. Phil seemed to think it wasn't an extremely big deal. He may not be brushing this off, but he doesn't seem too upset that Dan found out.
"Okay I know that that was probably not fun to watch but you can't exactly parallel that to me literally dying and coming back having to kill people to survive. I'm pretty sure that was more traumatic."
"Okay fine. But that doesn't change the fact that I just watched you kill someone. How long has this been going on?" Dan began to wonder if the recent behaviours of Phil were because he had been recently turned, or if this had been going unnoticed for even longer.
"How long has what been going on? Me being a vampire?" Dan nods. "Oh, I got turned about a year after I met you. You know that time where I like dissapeared for a few days? Yeah that's what happened." Now Dan was furious. How had Phil kept something like this from him for 5 whole years? And it happened while Dan knew him? He couldn't tell who he was angry at anymore. Phil for lying to him all this time, or himself for not realizing sooner.
"You've been like this basically the entire time you've known me? And you've never told me? Not even right after it happened?"
"Well it's not exactly something I can fit into the conversation casually, now is it? 'What did you think of the new video, Dan? Oh, by the way, I have to kill people to survive now.' Wouldn't exactly go over well, now would it?" Dan let out another frustrated sigh.
"I just- there had to be another way for me to find out than this. You could've just told me at some point and I would have been a little more accepting about it."
"You can't exactly blame me for not wanting to tell you. I knew this would happen if I did. You were scared enough of the supernatural even when you thought it wasn't real. I wasn't about to tell you and have you leave because of it."
"That's fair I guess. But if you did tell me beforehand, it probably would be a whole lot easier to get used to and a hell of a lot easier to choose to stay."
"Wait you're not saying-" Phil cut himself off, looking up at Dan. He knew exactly what Dan was saying, but he didn't want to confront the truth just yet. And he sure didn't want to know that it was his fault- his condition's fault.
"I don't know what I'm saying. I just need time to adjust. It's a lot to take in, you know?" Phil nods. He understands Dan's distress, but it's not like it's his fault he's this way. He's just trying to survive. "But you still haven't explained why your face was like that. Is that just how vampires are..?"
"Yeah. You've watched Buffy with me. It's like that. Why do you think I like that show so much? They managed to get it right."
"And the soulless thing..? Is that right?" Dan had calmed down a bit, but now he was getting worried again. If Buffy had gotten it right, then does that mean that they're all merciless things that don't care who they hurt?
"I guess. I mean I don't know if 'soul' is the right word but I don't feel bad about what I do, if that's what you're really asking. I feel like I should, but I just can't." This scared Dan for real now. Phil actually didn't feel bad about killing that girl. He didn't feel bad about killing anyone. He instinctively backed away from Phil, no longer sure of what Phil could do.
"You're telling me that you don't feel anything about what you did to that girl, or to anyone else you've hurt?" Phil shrugged. "I need some time to think… I- uh… Maybe it's best if you keep a bit of distance for now…" Dan started backing away from Phil even more.
"Oh come on Dan, you're not actually scared of me. Don't you think if I was going to hurt you I'd have done it by now? It's been 5 years and nothing has happened to you."
"I'm sorry I just… I can't bring myself to trust you yet. Sorry." Dan turned and rushed into his room, shutting and locking the door behind him. He knew that he shouldn't be scared. Phil was right, he would've already hurt him if he had wanted to. That didn't change that he was terrified of him right now. He might calm down later, but now he just needs to be away from Phil.
About a month later, Dan still couldn't believe there is an actual vampire in his house. He still has trouble being near Phil, but it's getting better. He can pass him without a stab of fear in his chest, so that's something. He can't help but think of that girl every time he sees Phil. And every time he sees Phil do something that's considered 'signature' Phil, he can't help but wonder if that's just part of him being a vampire. Or if he uses it to his advantage to kill someone. Like every time he looks at Dan, he can see Phil making that one face that used to always break his heart. Now, it sickens him. That pitiful look on his face that makes everyone give in has probably gotten someone killed. He would feel so much worse about hating Phil if he wasn't constantly thinking about these things. But that's all he thought of, so he never felt bad. He could see how much he was hurting Phil, but because he was blinded by his eating habits, he didn't do anything about it. All Phil could do was respect Dan and try to stay away from him, no matter how much it pained him. And he didn't miss the looks Dan would give him. Even if he didn't mean to, Dan glared at Phil every time he looked at him. He supposed he deserved it a bit though, I mean he was a murderer and humans tend to frown upon those kinds of things.
As time went on, Phil noticed the glaring less and less. Alternately, Dan was having less and less panic attacks in Phil's presence. Progress was being made. They still had a long way to go, though. But at least Dan was talking to Phil again. Simple things like: Are we out of cereal? What do you think about the video? How do I add this effect? It may have been small, but it was something. Phil was happy to have the change. Dan may still be wary of him, but he was trying. Phil was trying as well. He went out for food less often, and made absolute sure Dan was asleep when he left, so he didn't have to think about what Phil was doing when he left. It was a decent system they had, for the moment at least.
Dan was warming up to the idea of Phil not being human. Not the whole killing thing just yet, just the inhuman thing. Looking back, he was surprised he didn't suspect it sooner honestly. Phil had all of the signs of being a vampire, he just hadn't come out with it yet. He was pale as heck, was always cold, avoided sunlight and when they did go out he layered up even though it was warm. Add that onto the weird behaviour leading up to that day in the alley and it's basically a stereotypical vampire. How could Dan have not realized sooner? Whatever, none of that mattered now. Phil was a vampire, and he'd have to learn to deal with it without flinching every time Phil so much as looked at him. He'd learn eventually. One day.
It was a year later that that day came. Dan had fully come to terms with what Phil was and it showed. He was talking to Phil just as much as they were before, they were appearing in more videos together, and Dan was able to maintain eye contact with Phil without thinking about the alley. Now a lot of their interactions become a game of 20 questions from Dan. Instead of scared, he was curious. While they sat in the lounge together, their conversation quickly devolved into one of these sessions. Phil had off handedly mentioned something about when he had been turned and that got him curious.
"How were you turned? Like what happened?" Dan inquired.
"Well I had to work late that night, so I missed the bus back home. So, of course, I was stupid and instead of asking a friend for a ride I decided it would be fine if I just walked home. As you can tell, it wasn't fine. I remember being grabbed and trying to fight, but they were so much stronger. I didn't have a chance. I also remember a lot of pain, then there was nothing. I woke up in a coffin underground. I had to dig my own way out and that is not exactly fun."
"Wow… That sounds terrible."
"Yeah. It was. That was a long time ago though so it's whatever." The fact that Phil was able to shrug this off like it was nothing amazed Dan. Everything about this amazed Dan. He continued asking questions.
"How do you talk if you can't breathe?"
"Magic." Phil didn't know the answer to a lot of Dan's questions. You don't exactly get a manual when you pop out of the ground.
"Okay then. How do you blush if you don't have a beating heart?"
"Magic." Phil paused and thought about it, "No actually it might have something to do with the blood vampires consume? I'm not sure."
This back and forth went on for a long time before Dan couldn't think of any more questions and it was time for them to film a gaming video.
Even the fans started to notice a change. They still managed to maintain the gaming channel when the whole thing began, and because this required them to be in the videos together, their fans noticed a change. However, they were even more perceptive to the positive change that rolled around. They even mentioned stuff that Dan hadn't even been fully aware of himself. Like how Dan had gone back to the touchy- feeliness he had been exhibiting before the incident. And how he had been doing the "heart eyes" as they liked to call it more now. Of course Phil noticed these things though. The first time Dan had subconsciously rested his hand on him he had been surprised, but didn't move as to not tip Dan off to the fact that he was touching him. He became hyper aware of these things, and he kept wondering if it was just for the sake of the videos or if was real affection. It was when Dan had been cuddling on the couch nearly falling asleep on him, when no cameras were on, that he realised everything would be alright.
