(A/N: Don't ask me where this came from, I haven't the slightest idea. I'm thinking of continuing this one. Please review.)
Rubber Ducks
It all started during a typical Order meeting. And when I say ordinary, I mean ordinary.
Molly was worrying about her children.
Mad-Eye Moody was being paranoid.
Ron was alternately glaring at Draco and Snape.
Hermione was teasing Draco about being an honorary Weasley.
Draco was horrified at the thought of being a Weasley.
George was discussing WWW's newest products with Charlie.
Fred was slipping a potion into Ron's drink.
Harry was discussing muggle technology with Arthur.
Snape was glaring and scowling and generally being a bastard.
Dumbledore was merrily twinkling at the whole congregation.
Such was the scene that Althea Fiametta was confronted with when she entered headquarters with determined strides.
Althea was an assassin for the Order.
She was a damn good one, too.
The Order knew of her, of course, but they had never seen the wily witch.
"What happened?" Dumbledore asked politely as the rest of the Order eyed her distrustfully.
"I did a head count," the assassin responded, her Irish accent prominent due to her shock.
"Your point?" Dumbledore pushed, not knowing what she was talking about.
"There are around twenty-five hundred Death Eaters, am I correct?" she asked.
"Yes," he answered cautiously.
"Wrong," Fiametta replied. "Seventeen out of every twenty are part of the illusion."
"What's going on here?" Moody grouched. "I demand that we be informed this instant!"
Fiametta turned to face the entire Order. "I am Althea Fiametta," she said, as if that explained everything.
"What about this illusion you're talking about?" Remus inquired.
"I created an illusion," the assassin explained, "to cover up the disappearance of over 2,125 followers, over the course of eight years."
There was silence.
And then Tonks whispered, "You killed over two thousand Death Eaters?"
"No," she said in a business-like tone. "I have an army of rubber ducks armed with bananas."
Fiametta nodded importantly.
There was silence.
"Terrifying," Draco said, breaking the silence.
