Author's Note: This takes place between seasons 5 and 6, so if you have not finished season 5, or if you have not started season 6, then please do not read this. Other than that there really isn't much to say. This kind of happened out of nowhere yesterday evening, and now here it is. lol Enjoy! :)
Dean came home from work on December 4th to find an unopened package sitting on the doorstep. Even after nearly half a year spent living with Lisa and Ben his hunter instincts were still sharp, and so immediately Dean's suspicions were raised.
He approached the parcel with caution, but all of his apprehension was erased as he took in the familiar scrawl of Bobby Singer on the package's front.
"What are you doing Bobby?" Dean muttered to himself, gently lifting the box and taking it with him inside the house.
Dean sat in his office late into the night just staring at the unopened box. Bobby's penmanship seeming to stare back, imploring him to make a move.
He wasn't quite sure why he was still hesitant to open it. He knew the holidays were coming up, and even though Bobby had never been the type to send him a Christmas card, it wasn't completely ridiculous to think that the man he viewed as an adoptive father had sent him a gift…
Then again, Dean supposed it wasn't the idea of a gift, but the thought of what the gift might be, that really made him pause every time he wanted to reach for the scissors.
Because what if the contents of that box had to do with Sam?
He was barely holding it together for Ben and Lisa. Every day he watched disappear on the calendar he knew meant he was twenty four hours closer to the first Christmas he would have to spend knowing his brother was gone forever.
He had left the life. He had gotten out because Sam asked him too. Had made him promise to…
If Dean opened that box, if he opened something that brought the thoughts of Sam that much closer to him…
He might not be able to keep his promise any longer.
So instead Dean flipped off his desk light and left the room, eager to go to sleep and get away from the package that filled him with potential regret.
It was one week before Christmas and Dean still had not opened the box.
He stared at it in his free time, to the point where Lisa and Ben had both taken to leaving the room when they saw him glancing at it. They seemed to think that maybe they were standing in the way of him opening it, but they didn't understand.
He felt like a teenage girl, so afraid to touch the gift because what if it made him experience feelings? What if it made him cry? God knows he had shed enough tears over the past several months. He didn't need any more of that, right?
But the worst part was the fear that, whatever the box contained, it might hurt him enough to push him over the edge. There was a chance it could persuade him to break his vow to Sam.
And then a familiar voice sounded from inside his head.
Geez Dean, what's your problem? It's from Bobby! You can't just ignore him like that. Now pick up the scissors and open the thing! You'll probably be glad you did.
It was what he knew Sam would say if he could see him now, and the worst part was that he knew it was the truth. At least, he knew he couldn't continue to openly ignore a gift from his surrogate father. As for whether or not he would be glad he had looked…
Well, Dean Winchester had always been a risk taker, and so he picked up the scissors.
Several minutes later Dean sat reading the note that had been sitting atop a small stack of messily wrapped boxes; one each for himself, Lisa, and even Ben.
Dean,
I know you probably took damn near an eternity to open this thing up, and I don't blame you. But I wanted to give you something for the holidays, because…Well just because, alright? Anyway, there're Visa gift cards in there for Lisa and the boy, because heaven knows I've got no clue there. Yours is for a bakery in your area. I hate to fuel your addiction, but I guess maybe you've earned a nice pie or two. Just watch your gut, ok? Don't let the domestic life turn you soft on the outside too.
Dean chuckled and muttered, "Yeah. Well someone's a hypocrite then, eh Bobby?"
There's one more thing I want to give you, but it isn't exactly something I could wrap up. I set up an email account for you, and I've been using it as a photo album.
Dean paused there, suddenly unsure he could continue. This was exactly the sort of thing he'd been worried about, but he eventually took a deep breath and read on.
I've been sending emails from that account to itself, and I've attached pictures to each of them. They all have text in the messages that explains the picture attached to it. See, I found a box of photos the other day that I think you should have. It took me too many hours to figure out how to use my damn smart phone to get take digital pictures of hard copy pictures and send them in an email, but I figure it was worth it. And I know, I know, I'm a techy Martha Stuart with all this online scrap booking…But that's beside the point. Basically, the information is at the bottom of this note. The account name and password, I mean. And they're both pretty easy to remember, so even if you throw this out today because you can't handle it, I know you'll be able to get to it later when you regret it.
Dean wanted to laugh at that, because Bobby knew him very well. But the laugh died on his lips when he read the last sentence of the letter.
Just remember, I did this because he'd want you to have these Dean, and because I know someday you'll want to have them too.
Bobby
Dean stared at the last words and felt a torrent of emotions rushing through him. This was precisely what he had feared would happen. That maybe Bobby would have given him something that made him hurt, and that made him think about Sam. That made him want Sam back, possibly enough to actually try for it.
Don't worry Dean. I know you won't let me down.
Sam's voice echoed in Dean's thoughts again, and Dean was reminded of the time his brother had dragged him up to the angels, knowing full well Dean had sworn he was planning to say 'yes' to Michael, yet had believed in him enough to be sure he wouldn't really go through with it.
Sam had been right that day and Dean had to hope the same could be true now, because suddenly he was rushing to the nearest computer.
He entered the account name and password Bobby had scribbled at the bottom of his note. ("Winchester67" and "521983", respectively.)
The account opened and Dean was greeted by a string of emails, all labeled things like "You and Sam visit the ocean for the first time" and "Sam's first bike". He felt his heart pounding rapidly in his chest, and hurriedly clicked on an email at random.
Dean,
This one is a picture I took myself a few years ago, maybe 2006, of you and Sam when you had that little competition of who could shoot the most cans off a junker with a blindfold on. And in case you forgot, he kicked your ass boy.
Dean opened the attachment, anxiously waiting for the image to load, and when it did his breath caught in his throat.
Because there was his brother, smiling at the camera with one fist raised in the air, mid-victory cheer.
There was Sam, eyes shining bright with life and laughter, and he looked so innocent with his bowl-like haircut and his happy-go-lucky demeanor.
He looked like the Sam Dean missed more than anything in the world.
It took a moment to realize that he was crying, but when he did, Dean didn't try to stop it. He let the tears go, alone in the dark office, doing his best to stay quiet so as not to wake Lisa or Ben.
Then Dean found that he had to keep going. He opened emails and read notes and stared at pictures all through the night, and each time he saw Sam's face fill the screen, it hurt. But it hurt a bit less each time.
By the morning, Dean was actually smiling as he clicked open photos from their childhood, recalling all of the stories that went along with each frame.
Eventually Lisa did come downstairs, and when she found him staring at the computer she asked what he was doing.
"I'm looking through some old photos." Dean replied as casually as he could. She seemed to understand because she left him to it, and he gratefully returned to his activity.
By the time he had opened all of the emails Dean was surprised to find that, after seeing so many pictures of his brother, he felt a greater sense of commitment to the promise he had made him.
True, he still wanted to run up to the Cage and pound on the door, threatening horrible acts of violence unless Sam was returned to him…
But he also knew that Sam had asked him not to do something like that for a good reason. He couldn't risk letting Lucifer and Michael back out, or risk the world burning. Not when Sam had done literally everything he could to stop those things from happening.
No. He would keep his promise to his brother because it mattered to Sam, and that mattered to Dean.
So instead he did the only other thing he felt compelled to do...
Bobby Singer opened his email account on Christmas morning to discover a gift he truly had not been expecting:
An untitled email from one "Winchester 67".
Opening it, he saw that only three words were written inside, but they put a smile on his face all the same.
Thank you Bobby.
The hunter continued to smile at the screen before softly answering, "You're welcome Dean."
Secondary Author's Note: Thank you for reading! I hope you enjoyed. Please take a moment to leave a review, because feedback is always appreciated, and because that would be a lovely kind of gift too. lol
