Only Human

by ashitahe

Summary: If only we could live with held into past like chain; chained to never let go, it would always be alright. Yet when I learned how to reach you, I knew how it was going to be different. I wanted to pursue your shadow that in future though I unable to, because I only human… KL

Author's Note: Konnichiwa…. This idea always trying to strike me down so for release it from burden me, I write it out instead. The summary too confusing? But that is how the story will going. Well, I want so much for updating often, but sad to say, I write this when I have test and will be there more serious tests, so I must sneak out to write this. Sorry if it too bad or don't turn right.

Anyway, this is all will be written in Kira's POV. Dunno if this will be stay on the next chapter or so.

Disclaimer: This author doesn't have any right to produce Gundam SEED and Gundam SEED Destiny, because not her that own Gundam SEED and Gundam SEED Destiny. So instead, she wrote this for her own satisfies


- 1st: emotionless


Again, my pen tripped that way to fall into the smooth surface of the wooden table. I had been so much trying to concentrate my mind to the teacher that explaining the whole things about chemistry, and beside; this was my favorite lesson of the rest. He was doing his job with glee, smiling contently to his students. I never knew the reasons of entire kind of those smiles, but he often did that. His glasses were sliding slightly downward, and not so long his hand would creep to hastily fix the position. From the first time he stepped into this class, he busily gripping a stick, and with that smile, he usually did his daily routine on teaching. I was not bored with his behavior, really.

I was trying to stifle my yawn, my body suddenly got indeed tired and exhausted; and how it turned ironically was, I really did not do anything today, yet my body seemed disagree with me.

My mind was really blank in this moment, as a witch already stolen every piece my mind often curling up with. My heart was beating slowly, one by one paced like a tick-tock clock which always steady on counting rhythms. I slumped my body down a bit, leaning my head to the table for a while. And that was when my eyes getting blurry, with thick wall of water that covering my sight. I yawned again, now my hand rubbing my eyes. Seemed, I sleepy right now, and I was more confused than before; my teacher did everything right; he always passionate and detailed about everything he desired to explicate.

Then why?

Was I starting to lose my interest on this? I inquired myself, wondering about the weird times I often possessed with myself.

Then I heard a sound of soft 'click', not far from my assigned seat, middle area. I turned my head to back, and suddenly feeling my breath squeezed out from my lungs, yet again. My heart, deep inside was beginning to race chaotically, without a proper cadence they jolted up.

My amethyst ones met hers, dull and almost colorless round orbs. Her head bowed down, and those eyes always seemingly withered. Since first time I knew her, my classmate, she rare spoke too much. Those ones, ad infinitum watching the words engraved on her book without ever looking around anymore. Those small hands, porcelain ones continually curled up into one fists full palms, placed it right out but around her book. More, her hair was sprawling limply around her back, bubble gum hued which appeared on my eyes very pale.

I was still, silent for few seconds before bringing myself back to the reality. What was that something fell to the floor until I spun my head back?

And suddenly, as she also realized something, she gasped out softly, barely sounded like a whisper nor voice at all, as wind hushed in nothing, "My pencil.."

But I was listening her, too carefully with the hint of her mouth that she symbolized to me; I was able to make out her mouth saying, as I even there before her mouth.

So, I dive my hand down to the fissure of my seat and hers, another hand held the side of table, groping momentarily until I found my fingertips touching its surface. I was soon holding it on my right palm and pulling it up. Turning my head back to front, my hand was the opposite, it reaching out back, opened my palm without even witnessed how my hand progressing.

I unable to look how her features right now, but the more that I knew, she shoving herself a bit forward, her breath flying amidst the gap of air surrounded us; her voice hovering with utterly happiness and sincere gratitude, "Thank you, Kira-san."

I only nodded slightly, attempting to once more whetted my mind to the teacher, but I just couldn't. More after the circumstance, my mind merely could be intoxicated with the girl behind me. Her face, her usual behavior on the day…

I solely helped her once with that gesture, but that voice… full of happiness, shivering out of cold like she wanted to weep and crying. As she really wanted such care, and pleading for more.

I wondered how her face would be actually looked when she uttered that. Was her eyes would be gleamed with pure tears? Was she was going to smile after none ever plastered upon her face?

As the sound of teacher faded away, vanished for seconds, new interest welled up inside my chest, together with my heartbeat that increasing steadily fast, pounding hard until I was afraid it would rip into two.

I desired for nothing, but knowing this, girl with pastel tresses who rare to smile, even further

I wanted to acknowledge her more, after half of year had gone in futility….


Author's Note: I know, this probably even can not be categorized as story. But hey, we still have too much chapters to go, right? Sorry for the short chapter… I really want to type longer but my head just can't find any idea more.

Honestly I want to type something that really anguishes, but seemingly I can't…..

Ne, if you really kind and sweet, give me a bit of reviews to know where is my mistakes, k? I even could not proof-reading before submit this because I'm really in hurry. So, ashita he? – tomorrow again?

words count: 815