A/N: Alright so the reviewers of my last fic wanted to see more of my work (I really don't know why), so here it is.

Shout out to IWriteNaked for being awesome and pissing people off with joy. And Claffles, 'nuff said.

Disclaimer: I obviously don't own tmi. If anyone knows how to change that, let me know. Probably not open to murder though.

Secondary Disclaimer: Constructive criticism is very much welcome, jerky rudeness is very much not. It'll piss me off. A lot.


I wake up to the sound of someone knocking on my door. I internally cringe when I see that it's only 8:30. Do people even sleep in this house?

"Come in." Or, you know, just let me sleep.

My parents, Jocelyn and Luke, and my brother, Jonathan, all squeeze into my small room and I get very confused.

"Either someone died or we're having family meetings in here now, and I really wouldn't prefer the latter." Wow that sounded horrible. Way to go, Clary.

Jocelyn just rolled her eyes and said "Please tell me you didn't forget what today is."

"I didn't forget what today is." Sarcasm is my refuge. Especially when I'm confused. Nobody needs to know that I'm lost.

"Okay, then what's today?'

"Umm… Thursday." Hey, it's true. It's not my fault she didn't specify.

Luke finally decides that it's time to speak and yells "HAPPY 16TH BIRTHDAY CLARY!" I think I just temporarily lost my hearing.

"Oh, that's today?" Fan-freaking-tastic. The klutz gets attention ALL DAY LONG.

"Of course it is, sweetie! We've got so many surprises for you! And I don't want to hear any complaining! Get dressed and meet me in the kitchen for breakfast," she said as they all filtered out of my room.

Great, there's no way to get out of this.


After I get dressed, I jog down the stairs. I still haven't learned to NOT jog anywhere, so, of course, I trip on the last step and faceplant on the floor. I can hear Jonathan chuckling.

"Happy birthday, little sis. How'd you manage to live to 16?"

"Sarcasm. And coffee, which I need right now, so I'd recommend getting out of my way or you won't make it another year." And with that, he moves.

Mom makes me waffles for breakfast. The best diddly-darn waffles I've tasted—no, experienced—in my entire existence. You could say it was love at first bite. Ah, puns.

The rest of he day proceeds as most birthdays do; cake, presents, unwelcome attention, and everything. Did I mention I don't like attention? Hey that rhymed.

At about 5:30, Jocelyn tells me to put on a dress that she left in my room because we're having dinner guests. We never dress formal for guests.

I contemplate complaining, but I know I wont succeed in my mission, so I go and put on the dress. I don't like dresses, but it's actually very pretty. It's white with spaghetti straps and it reaches the tops of my knees. I add some black flats and attempt to calm down the frizzy mess I call hair. I finally have to give up and settle for slightly less frizzy and walk downstairs.

I can ear voices coming from the living room, so I walk in and survey the battlefield. I see Stephen and Celine Herondale. They've been friends of my parents for nearly 10 years and come over often, but they always bring Jace, their son. Or demon, but they don't see him that way, only I do. He's always tormented me, and my many freckles and bright red hair are often the subjects of his jokes. And he is now a famous singer with millions of girls after him, so that just adds to his already ENORMOUS ego.

He also happens to be sitting in this room.

I take a moment to collect myself and then sit in the chair closest to the door (just in case I need to go get my baseball bat). I look at Jace and he just smirks. I'd like to slap the smirk off of his face.

Our parents make small talk about business, the economy, and other things until it's time for dinner, where I'm forced to sit by Jace.

At the end of the meal, Luke stands up to make an announcement.

"As we all know, Jace's career has taken off and, of course, that means that many women desire to be with him." At that, Jace just smirks and looks proud of himself. What a man-whore. "This has lead to one too many affairs and Jace's manager isn't happy about the criticism in the press. He is going to drop Jace's contract UNLESS he settles down and gets married. The Herondales have discussed it with us, and we have come to a conclusion." Jocelyn and Luke both look nervous and… scared?

"Clary," Jocelyn begins, "we've arranged for you and Jace to be married."

I look at Jace and he's wearing his signature smirk.

It takes a minute for everything to click in my head, and by that time, a white hot rage was boiling inside me. I knew there was a reason I hate my birthday.


A/N: So I hope Chapter 1 wasn't too horrible. I'm planning to write more chapters as long as this one gets a good response, but no promises about extremely frequent updates, maybe once a week. And let me know if there's anything specific you'd want to see in this. I might not use suggestions, but I might or it'll give me ideas.

I'm really self conscious about my writing and sharing it with others ('So why are you writing fanfiction and posting for millions of people to read?' Because I'm logical like that). Again, go check out IWriteNaked because it'll be worth it.