I was bored and wanted to write something stupid that I know I won't be able to turn in for a grade.
This isn't meant to offend anyone or the stories that they write. If you do like the cliches that I included in this story, more power to you. I just don't like any of these stories personally.
All I wanted to do was eat some ramen and finish watching The Great Gatsby. Was that so much to ask?
I was just in my kitchen not even 2 minutes ago, pouring hot water into the instant ramen cups while my sister was setting up the DVD player to watch her English project with me because she didn't read the book. Then, out of nowhere, this massive light came from the ramen and hit me like a buch of bricks.
Seriously, how the fudge nuggets did I end up in this situation?
'BECAUSE OF MEEEE!' A shirll, teenage voice said from up above, nearly shattering my eardrums.
"WHAT THE FUCK?!" I yelled out as something crashed into my back and sent me down to the floor.
Now, with my face in grass and my mouth full of dirt, my annoyance was starting to grow.
What the hell is going on?
'It is I! THE AUTHOR OF THIS BOOK!' That annoying voice screamed even louder.
"GET OFF OF ME!" I screamed in return.
She did not get off and continued to talk. I think my back is caving in on itself at this point.
'Welcome to the Hunter x Hunter world! The adventure of the world that all your friends will be jealous of! Where Hunters, Nen user and assassins run wild! Who wouldn't want to be here?!' She said, as if this was a bad brocheure she threw together before class.
I wasn't really listening to her, as my back was slowly deforming itself by the sheer weight of this chick.
How much does this girl weigh?
'Now, you may be wondering, "How did I get in this situation?" Well, I'm here to tell ya that I was bored in class and cooked up this little plot and you were the person I chose to carry this out on! Isn't that great?'
I finally managed to push her off of me, after moments of struggle for freedom.
'But wait! That's not all!' She said, completely ignoring me pushing her. 'You get to live the dream life as a whole new person! Isn't that awesome?!'
I turned around to face this crazy chick, only to come face to face with the most bizzare person I have ever seen.
This chick was around, maybe 13 years old. She was slightly chubby, wearing clothes that resembled more of a doll than anything else.
She was wearing a rather poofy dress, black in color and full of white frills and ribbons and god knows what else there was there. Her hair was dyed bubblegum pink and cut into a bob haircut and with blue eyes that were probably brighter than my future.
She was rather short for someone her age.
(This is the complete opposite of what I looked like)
My jaw dropped.
"Who the fuck are you?" Was the only thing I managed to say.
'I told you! I'm the Author!' She said, rolling her eyes. 'Jeez, you got to listen me if you want to survive this place.'
I said nothing as she suddenly grabbed me from the ground and pulled me up to my feet. I almost fell down from the sheer force of it, but I managed to stable myself.
Before I had the chance to demand an explanation, she suddenly started talking again.
'Listen here, sugar. I just granted you the best wish ever and I have gifted you with the most amazing persona for this place. You can thank me later, hun.'
"Thank you?!" I shouted in disbelief.
'You're welcome!'
"That is not what I meant!" I shouted at her, pushing her slightly. "Where am I and how did I get here? Are you some sort of crazy kidnapper? If this is a prank, this isn't funny!"
This chick simply gave me a cocky smile and put her hand behind her head in a relaxed pose.
'I already explained this. You are my test subject for this fanfiction and we are currently in the Hunter x Hunter world!' She paused. 'Or, really just the plane between our worlds. Not important!'
It took me quite a bit to respond to that, but when I did, let me tell ya, it was a storm of swear words, insults and a bunch of things that I cannot say because they will get me flagged.
Yeah, I wasn't really proud of the way that I acted, but come one! How would you react in that situation?
So, after I calmed down a bit...a lot...
'Woah there, Nelly. That's quite a mouth that you've got there.' She laughed. 'I knew I was right in picking you!'
I huffed, out of breath from the long rant that I just did. I was about to start yelling again, when I found that my lips were closed together and would not open, no matter how much I tugged and screamed.
'Now now! We're never going to get this story rolling if you don't let me explain what's going to go down. I'll explain and you just sit back and listen. Ok? Ok!"
She then pushed me back into a chair that just appeared out of nowhere and pulled out a giant whiteboard from behind her, despite the fact that there was no way in hell that she could have something like that in her back pocket.
She cleared her throat.
'Alright. So, here's what's happening.' She said. 'My name is Blue-FireFlower, though you can call me Blue, and this is my first fanfiction (that I've posted)! You see, I have been watching the show for a good week now and have decided to write the best fanfiction ever! And what better way to make a great story than to have the absolute best character ever to tell it from!'
She pointed at me.
'This is where you come in, my little victim! I have devised a strategy to make this plan a success and I'm going to need you to live it out for me!'
My eyes widened and I quickly shook my head, screaming at this insane girl's proposal.
'Glad you understand! Wanna see the character I created for you?'
More frantic shakes of my head.
She ignored me and pressed the screen of a projector, which God knows where that came from, and suddenly, a very familiar character was seen on the whiteboard.
"That is Ooka Miko from Utau." I thought in horror.
Did this chick really just take art of a random character from the internet to represent her character? She does know that she isn't even from an anime, right?
'This is my super cool OC, Natsuki Sahara! She's 12 years old and really awesome!'
God, save me!
'She is from the Yato clan, a clan of bloodthirsty people who are known to be strong and deadly on the battlefield! Even more powerful that Killua's family!'
She stole that from Gintama!
'However, her clan was massacred by Hunters to the point of near extinction many years ago because they were killing so much and had a large bounty on their heads!'
That's Black*Star's backstory from Soul Eater!
'Because of this, they were forced to live in their own refugee camps. Some even vowed to kill all Hunters in the name of their god!'
That's just Fullmetal Alchemist right there! Why?!
I think I was crying at the stupidity at this point. What else is she going to rip off? Steven Universe?
'Her powers are so cool too!'
Someone save me! I beg of you. Give me death.
'I tried not to make her overpowered, so I only gave her the basics!'
I'm so scared.
'She has a lot of strength, but not as much as her other clan members! She's really smart too, but that's only book smarts. She's rather naive on the streets!'
Wait...this...this is actually getting good. Maybe there's hope after all.
'She's also the Leader's daughter, so she's technically a princess!'
DAMMIT!
Cue me bashing my head a desk that just appeared out of nowhere.
I had to tune out everything that she was saying from this point on. My brain cells were begging for me to hurl myself into an active gyser.
'Now onto her personality!' She was shouting at this point.
I have a feeling that I'm not going to like this.
'She's really shy around everyone, but also really outgoing and very polite, growing up as royalty. She also very kind and polite, but can also get really mean and sadistic when she's angry. She hates killing, but not if you hurt someone she cares about! She also...blah...blah blah...blah...'
All these personality traits contradict each other!
I want to die.
'And that is my character! Any questions?'
With a snap of her fingers, my mouth was free. I didn't say anything for a minute to collect my thoughts.
My eye twitched at the sheer stupidity of this whole thing.
I took a deep breath and rose from my chair.
"You do realize that this will never work, right?" I asked, keeping myself calm for now.
'What do you mean?' She asked, confusion on her face.
I shook my head.
"None of this makes any sense." I said calmly. "A lot of this information contradicts each other."
She gave me a blank look.
"First of all, if this clan is oh-so powerful and stronger than any other, then how the hell did they get wiped out by Hunters while the Zoldyck Family gets away completely untouched every time? Wouldn't they kill the Hunters before they could die first?"
More blank looks.
"Second, if my clan hates Hunters with a passion, why am I taking the exam to be one in the first place? Wouldn't I be encouraged to attack Hunters instead of becoming one? What purpose would a licence even have if I'm in a refugee camp?"
She started to blush.
"Third, princess? Really? Of a camp of survivors? I thought I wasn't supposed to be overpowered here? I would understand if there were multiple children, but you're making me seem like the sole heir to the Yato clan or something. It honestly seems like you just sandwhich all your favorite animes together."
She frowned a bit and looked down.
"Fourth, I've only seen up the episode 30 and some clips of the later series before dropping it months ago! Why me an not some die hard fan or the series? I mean, you've only watched a weeks worth of episodes. I know there's no rule to writing fanfiction, but I really think you should watch a bit more before you write one of such a long series."
She remained silent.
"Fitfth, how the hell am I shy, but really outgoing? And why do I hate fighting and killing, but my culture thrives on it? Does that make sense to you?"
She blinked.
"Finally, this 'design' won't really work for this world!"
'And why not?' She snapped, crossing her arms and pouting.
"This character, Ooka Miko, is a tiny 3.5 year old wolf hybrid that switches genders when she switches forms. Does that sound like something that belongs in this anime?"
'Well no. But that's that character! This one is mine and I'm just using the design! She doesn't have to be a wolf!' She tried to reason.
I facepalmed.
"Even if that's the case, you're missing something very important here."
'What?'
"Her eyes are red." I said, pointing at them like it was obvious. Because it honestly was.
'What does that have to do with anything? I personally like red eyes on characters. They look cute.' She asked, sticking her nose up and huffing.
I twitched again.
"What other character has red eyes in this series?" I asked, starting to become more and more annoyed.
'Um...Kurapika.' She said, though it sounded like more of a question.
"And why is that?" I asked slowly.
'Because he's a Kur...ta...oooohhhh.' She finally got it.
"And what am I not?" I asked.
'A Kurta...'
I sighed in relief. Maybe she'll finally get this and I can go home.
She then pushed me to the ground.
'NO! THIS IS MY STORY AND MY CHARACTER! I CAN DO WHATEVER I WANT WITH HER AND THIS BOOK! IF YOU DON'T LIKE IT, THEN TOO BAD!' She screamed in my ear.
Suddenly, the ground broke from right under me and I fell into the abyss.
I screamed.
