Dedicated to my friend who passed away last month.
~RotG~
After more than three hundred years, you'd think it would be easier to cope with losing someone and to move on after they were...gone...but it never was. It always hurt, and it always took time to heal.
Jack Frost had always cared about the kids he had often played with, and he had watched them all grow up throughout the centuries. But finding out when one of them died - he could never get used to that. Especially if they were still so young.
Jack found out quickly that most people weren't like him. Like the girl and her cousins that used to live near his lake the first few years after he had drown. They had all grown older and eventually passed away, but he didn't and never would.
He knew now that the older woman who had died had been his sister, and somehow it hurt more knowing that. He had been to her funeral, but he hadn't known how special she had been. He only knew that she had been a sweet girl who had lost someone close to her when she was younger.
Jack had decided to make as many people as he could happy while they still alive. He made it snow, and they loved it. He started snowball fights, and everyone went home with smiles on their faces. Jack didn't know who he was, but he had known that he enjoyed making people smile...even if they couldn't see him.
That bothered him. He didn't understand why no one saw him, and he never got an answer when he asked the moon.
After he was chosen to be a Guardian, someone finally saw him. Someone finally believed in him.
The winter spirit walked around the lake, kicking the snow. It had only been a few days since Jamie had died, and Jack still couldn't believe it. When Sophie had told him, Jack had stayed with her at the house while their mom had started getting ready for a funeral. Sophie had cried, and Jack had tried not to while he stayed with her. Taking care of Sophie distracted him for a while, but once she fell asleep, he had to deal with his own confusion.
Looking at the lake, he wondered if this was how his sister had felt when he had died.
"It must suck, not being able to swim," Jamie had once told him, wincing sympathetically. The boy had turned thirteen a few days before then and couldn't wait for school to be over for winter break.
Thinking about how he had died, Jack thought, No, I think it's okay. "It looks fun," Jack admitted, "but I don't know how to swim anyway."
"Is there any way you can make the lake not freeze?" Jamie suggested. "Then maybe I could teach you."
Jack had spent his whole life making sure the ice was always thick. It would take some effort to do what Jamie was saying. "No, it's fine. Besides, you'd get sick swimming in icy water." Jack had grinned and ruffled the younger teen's hair affectionately.
"No, I wouldn't!" But Jamie had dropped the subject when he noticed Jack glancing nervously at the lake.
That had been years ago, but Jack hadn't forgotten it. Sometimes, he wondered if he should have asked Jamie to teach him anyway.
Everyone called it a car accident, and even though accidents happened all the time, Jack kept thinking it was his fault somehow. I should've kept the ice off the road, I should've known something like this could happen, I should've been more careful.
And that last thought brought back another memory.
Jack had been sitting in a tree near the lake when a sixteen year old Jamie found him. "What do you look so sad for?" Jamie asked him curiously once the older teen had jumped out of the tree.
"I was just thinking," Jack said simply. He had been wondering what he would do when Jamie died. It was a scary thought, and one Jack tried to avoid. But he knew his friend would die someday, and that fact bothered him when the younger teen wasn't around.
"About what?" Jamie sat down in the snow, shivering.
After a moment, Jack joined him. "I was just wondering..." Jack hesitated. "Why do people die?"
Jamie had frowned and looked at Jack. "I don't know. We just do." He paused, then added, "Mom always says there's a reason for everything, and that includes dying. Maybe it teaches a lesson to other people?" He shrugged. "I don't know."
Jack was quiet for a while.
Jamie noticed and added lightly, "But if people are really careful, they can put it off for a long time."
Jack wrinkled his nose at the thought. "Being careful isn't all that fun," he commented, and Jamie laughed.
"There are ways to be careful and have fun at the same time," Jamie replied, tossing a handful of snow at Jack. Jack grinned and soon they had started a snowball fight.
After Jamie had stopped to rest, Jack had poked him with the end of his staff. Jamie had chuckled and pushed the stick away. Jack still looked like something was bothering him, so Jamie told him with a sigh, "We're not like you and North. We don't have magic to keep us immortal."
"Fine." Jack frowned, then asked his friend hesitantly, "Can you promise me something?"
"Sure," Jamie replied instantly, "anything."
"Can you be really careful?" There was a smirk, but Jamie knew it was forced.
He nodded and smiled. "Sure. I promise."
But while someone could make a promise to be careful, it didn't mean the rest of the world would be too.
Jack was starting to really hate the lake and left to visit the Guardians. He found them at the North Pole. Tooth was staring sadly at the spot where Jamie's home was, where a light had vanished. There was always lights disappearing, but this was different somehow.
It took Jack a while to realize why. North had told him that they didn't have time for children, but now Jack was wondering if it was because they would get attached to the kids. That would explain why Tooth had stopped collecting the teeth, even if she had started again.
Jack looked at Sandy, who was creating dreams of a boy who laughed as much as he breathe and lived like there was no tomorrow.
"How are you feeling, Jack?" North asked the teen kindly.
"I'm... I'm okay," Jack lied, smiling sadly with a shrug. To take the attention off of himself, he added with a wince, "Sophie's got it worse."
"I'll have to go visit her," Bunny said, looking up.
"She's sleeping right now," Jack pointed out, and Bunny started to relax slightly.
"She's a strong girl," Tooth murmured, and everyone agreed.
Bunny tossed Jack a piece of chocolate, who took it with a confused look. "It helps," Bunny told him simply.
Jack glanced at Tooth, who nodded. "Just this once," she said, but the stern tone was missing. Usually she disapproved of the other Guardians eating sweets, but this time was an exception. Jack ate the chocolate slowly, thinking.
"Was there anything we could've done?" Jack asked the Guardians tentatively. He remembered Jamie's promise and could already guess the answer.
"You made 'im happy," Bunny said, shrugging helplessly. "That's all any of us can do."
Jack nodded, understanding.
"He was a good boy," North said finally, looking tired, "and he will be missed." Jack felt tears in his eyes and closed them.
Sandy noticed Jack falling asleep for the first time in a long time, and he gave the teen dreams of a boy who had cared about him and a girl who's older brother had died for her. Sometimes, Sandy wondered if Jack knew that the Bennets' were related to him, but he never asked and Jack never mentioned it to him.
When Jack woke up a few hours later, Bunny and Sandy were gone. Tooth was about to leave, and she hugged Jack. "It'll be okay," she whispered. Jack almost believed her as she let him go. "And if you ever wanna talk, we're all here for you."
Jack forced a smile and thanked her. They left the North Pole and went their separate ways.
Sophie told Jack the date of the viewing and told him it was fine if he didn't want to go. She knew Pippa wasn't going, and if the winter spirit couldn't handle it, Sophie would understand. She wasn't ready to face the truth either. She wanted to stay home and pretend her brother was still alive and okay.
"It's fine," Jack told her, shrugging and propping his staff against his shoulder. "I'll be there." Something about the dream Sandy had given him told him he had to be there.
The night before the viewing, Sophie left her window unlocked. Jack flew in an hour later, and the two talked quietly about their friends and how Sophie's family was doing since the accident.
Jack didn't know all the details - only that there had been an accident and his buddy had died instantly - but he didn't want to ask Sophie. She might not know much about it herself, and Jack didn't want to make things worse for her.
Instead, the two were helping each other to stay strong. They had been hanging out with their friends more often and kept pushing each other to hold on.
Tooth helped the two by giving them their best memories of Jamie, reminding them that he had lived a great life. It helped them to grieve and eventually move on. But it still took time for their hearts to heal.
At the viewing, Jack stayed out of everyone's way to avoid being walked through, and he stood near Sophie, who was trying not to cry. There was some music playing before a stranger made a speech for Jamie. Mrs. Bennet also made a tearful speech for her son, and then it was Sophie's turn. Sophie broke down crying, but she finished her speech and more music was played.
Then the viewing was over, and the funeral would start early the next morning.
Cupcake offered to take Sophie to Pippa's house, where the girls were going to have a sleepover. Sophie looked at Jack, who nodded and smiled. She smiled back ruefully and left. Monty told Jack that him and the twins were going to play video games, but Jack decided he needed to be alone for a while and left after saying his goodbyes - but not before giving each of them their own snowflakes. He even stopped by Pippa's to give her one.
After all, Jamie wouldn't want his friends to cry over him too much.
Jack wasn't sure why he wanted to be alone now; after three hundred years, he was sick of being alone. But he knew he had some things to think about. A song got stuck in his head, and he hummed it softly under his breath as he walked on the power lines with his hood pulled up.
The song he was humming was one that had been played at the funeral, and Jack knew he would never forget it now. The song soothed Jack, and he wondered if there really was a better place where Jamie was watching over them from. If there was, he wondered if his sister was there with him.
They would get along, Jack thought with a genuine smile. They would get into so much trouble without even trying. He chuckled and decided there had to be a better place for those two.
"You made 'im happy. That's all any of us can do."
And it still hurt to think about his friend, but it felt like things would be okay now. Life goes on, Jack thought with a heavy sigh. It isn't really fair, but it still keeps going.
"So you make all these snowflakes on your own?" An eighteen year old Jamie had asked, unconvinced.
The snow was falling softly as they walked around Jack's lake.
"Yeah," Jack had said proudly. Jamie snorted, and Jack looked offended. "Hey! It's not that hard to believe. Bunny paints all those Easter eggs."
"Liar, I've been to Bunny's Warren." Jamie grinned. "The eggs paint themselves!"
Jack crossed his arms and huffed. "Not all of them." Jamie gave Jack a look. The winter spirit deflated a little. "Fine, you win."
Jamie laughed. "Don't be a sore loser, Jack," the teen had told him teasingly.
"I'm not. We weren't even playing a game!" Jack rolled his eyes as Jamie laughed again and walked ahead of the Guardian of Fun.
Jack grinned and picked up a handful of snow to create a snowball. He aimed carefully before throwing it. Jamie nearly fell over, but he spun around to see Jack whistling innocently and walking the opposite direction. Jamie called after him, "That's real mature, Jack!"
Jack looked back at Jamie and replied, "Thanks!" Jamie had thrown a snowball at him, which Jack had dodged with a laugh.
Thinking back on those memories, Jack could almost believe his friend was still alive and waiting for him to visit. Jack didn't want to ruin that dream yet, so he put off returning to Jamie's for a little while longer.
Jack almost didn't notice the full moon as it shined down dimly, as if it were mourning too.
"You miss him?" Jack asked, not expecting an answer and not getting one. He sighed and shrugged. "I guess we all do, huh?" The moon didn't answer, and Jack shrugged again and kept walking.
