Title: Having Your Strawberry Chocolate Cake and Eating it Too

Rating: PG, maybe very light PG-13, as Peyton's mind does tend to swear.

Summary: This is a little look inside Peyton's head as to what happens after Lucas runs off to get married...She mopes. Brooke/Peyton. Femlash. This may or may not become a one-shot…I'm honestly not sure yet.

Feedback: I'd love some, of course, if you're willing to shoot some my way Thanks to everyone who reads this.

Author's Note: Sorry that I'm pretty random with my updates for anyone who is reading my Jessie/Katie story...My mind is all over the place lately, and it landed in the realm of Brooke/Peyton...Again This is femslash, so please don't flame me about that. If you aren't into girls/girls, then...please read other One Tree Hill fanfics.

Disclaimer: I do not own One Tree Hill, or anything to do with it, unfortunately for me...

It's that time of the year. The time of the year in Tree Hill, in which someone is left in his/her bedroom pining over someone else. Okay, that happens more than the casual observer would think. But, Peyton Sawyer was in her bedroom moping, as she had been for about five days now; she hadn't moped in Tree Hill for years. In fact, she hadn't properly moped for years in general, even after the disastrous marriage proposal in California, Peyton hadn't moped. She had pushed herself into her work. When she had first seen Lindsey and Lucas together at the book signing, she hadn't even moped then. Cried, yes. Been angry, yes. Moped, no.

Moping, for Peyton, used to involve her being in her bedroom with something covering her webcam as she cried and drew. Now, moping for Peyton seemed to involve her lying on her bed and staring at the ceiling as the vinyl of her choice played in the background of her life. Give it a few minutes and maybe she'd pick up a pencil to draw.

Moping wasn't a pretty process. Brooke was gone for something; Peyton hadn't seen her since before the moping started. However, Nathan had stopped by once, and Peyton hadn't answered the door. He had threatened to break down the door, and so she had answered, even though she knew that realistically he wouldn't really break down the door. She answered anyway. He took one look at the mascara and eyeliner running down her face before giving her a hug. He hadn't stayed long, because he had to go pick up Jamie. Before he left though, he put a bag of groceries on her counter. He assumed she hadn't been eating much, and as soon as he shut the door, she grabbed a muffin from the bag. He assumed right.

Haley, on the other hand, stopped by almost daily. Sometimes, Peyton let her in, sometimes she didn't. She had been the one that had broken the news to her, so naturally, she felt a bit guilty. "Lucas got married." Married. He was officially no longer single in any sense of the word. It could have been Peyton that he had married, but it wasn't. It was…It was…

Oh fuck.

Peyton Sawyer had been in the house for five days now. She had finished crying a couple of days ago, and since then the drawing had increased, so had the sleeping. Every day since she had found out, she had assumed that the bride had been Lindsey. But now…Peyton realized that Brooke hadn't been home since that day either. In fact, Peyton hadn't heard from Brooke, not even a phone call, and they were roommates. Haley hadn't specifically said who Lucas had married…or maybe she had. The blonde had drowned out her friend soon after she had heard that Lucas was married.

Now, realization dawned on the blonde's face. Lucas had run off to marry Brooke. It made sense. They had always been friends. And lately, they'd become closer, as Brooke had taken care of the baby. Peyton had known that they had gotten closer, and both of them had their hearts broken in the past. Lucas' heart had been broken by Lindsey, and maybe, a few years ago, even by Peyton, herself. Brooke's heart, well, it had been slowly broken down by so many people, though Peyton suspected that a large part of it was due to Lucas and maybe a little bit of it from Rachel. It only made sense that Lucas would have to be the one to fix it.

Peyton's heart tore itself a new hole as the realization sunk in deeper. Not only was he not her Lucas, but he was Brooke's Lucas. Brooke had been her best friend, for most of her life. Brooke had been the first one she had told when her mother had died. In fact, she hadn't really needed words to tell her, Brooke just seemed to know, and even though they were younger and could not drive yet, Brooke had shown up soon afterward. Brooke had been the first person that Peyton had stay over at her house when they were younger. They had gorged on junk food and watched way too much television, and then they had talked for the remainder of the night. That was also Peyton's first all-nighter. At seven in the morning, Peyton and crashed, as had Brooke soon afterward.

For a while, their friendship hadn't been there, but that was when Lucas had gotten in the way. Not that he had really "gotten in the way" per say, rather he had existed, and he had been perfect. Well, okay, maybe he wasn't perfect, but both girls had fallen head-over-heels for him. He had that little smirk and chuckle that went together whenever something amused him, and he'd tilt his head downward with that same little smirk when he was embarrassed. He knew how to dance, well, he knew how to dance better than his half-brother, Nathan, not that that was hard to accomplish. Nathan couldn't dance at all. Peyton allowed herself a smile as she remembered Nathan always stumbling around trying to dance. For being an amazing athlete, dancing was most definitely not up his alley.

Lucas had gotten in the way of their friendship but at the same time, he had been important. He was Peyton's first kiss. Okay, not her first kiss; he wasn't even her first Scott kiss, as that belonged to Nathan. Technically, Brooke was her first kiss. When they were six, they had been playing around, and good-naturedly, Brooke had informed Peyton that she was going to kiss a boy at recess the next day. Peyton pouted for a moment, not sure why that upset her. Brooke had called her silly and given her a kiss. The brunette had decided, "You deserve my first kiss better than some silly boy!" A younger Brooke had informed her, and Peyton's pout had gone away.

Well, most certainly, Lucas had been the first one to break her heart. Nathan hadn't been the first Scott to break her heart, because her heart had never really belonged to Nathan in the first place. She and Nathan never really fit the way that he and Haley did. Though, maybe Lucas wasn't really the first one to break her heart. That might have been Brooke too, in a sense. They had promised each other that they would never let a boy come between them, and yet Lucas had. The moment that Lucas stepped into their lives, he had torn the girls apart, no matter how slightly it seemed at first. That was the first time her heart was broken. Though, Peyton had done part of the tearing, so maybe that was the first time that Brooke ever had her heart broken too…

Lucas had still always been there for her though. When Peyton had been drugged the one night at the party, it was Lucas who had rescued her. Well, okay, Brooke had been the one to find her, but Lucas had gone inside to find out what had been used to drug her with. When Peyton got lonely in Los Angeles, she called Lucas for support to feel better. The blonde called him until they had broken up anyway, then she only called Brooke, who was equally busy with her new business.

The Scott boy always got her best birthday and Christmas present ideas though. Actually, that was Brooke too. Peyton "stole" for Brooke, for every birthday. The brunette never knew that Peyton really paid for the presents, or maybe she did, but no matter what she gave Lucas, Peyton realized she had never done anything equivalent to "stealing" for him. That was an adrenaline rush for Brooke, and the blonde didn't even have any idea how to give one of those to Lucas.

Lucas did have a good taste in music though. She had to give him that. Brooke's taste in music was more centered on what she could dance to, not that Peyton had anything against her dancing…Brooke was an amazing dancer, definitely better than Nathan and probably better than Lucas. Because, fuck, she could wriggle her hips and Lucas couldn't do that. Peyton allowed herself a little snort of a laugh at the idea of Luke wriggling his hips while dancing.

Peyton rolled over on her bed. She wasn't quite sure when her complaints had turned into comparing Nathan to Lucas and Lucas to Brooke. Oh, right, it was when she had realized that her best friend had married her ex-boyfriend. To be fair, Brooke was Luke's ex-girlfriend first. But honestly, Vegas? That wasn't Brooke's type. Sure, it was flashy and spontaneous, but Brooke couldn't just go get married in Vegas. She needed a show. She would have to have the wedding announcements in all of the local newspapers, and she'd invite hundreds of people, and knowing Brooke, everyone would come. If they didn't come, Brooke would somehow know who wasn't there, despite the other hundreds of people there, and they would know that she knew that they weren't there. She'd have the wedding dress, that she would most likely design herself. And she would spike the punch at her own wedding, giggling a bit, hoping that the groom, who was holding her wedding dress up to keep anyone from seeing this, properly blocked the view. Actually, there was a chance that Peyton would have to be the one holding up the wedding dress at the wedding, as she was maid of honor, and Lucas certainly wouldn't condone such behavior at a wedding.

There wouldn't be any throwing of birdseed or rice after the marriage. However, there would have to be a shiny white convertible waiting outside for the newly married couple, ready to whisk them off to the airport, where they would end up somewhere sunny with a beach. A convertible was cuter than a limo, but it would still have to be white. The wedding cake would be half chocolate and half strawberry, perfectly swirled somehow down the middle, with a white vanilla frosting. Peyton and Brooke had agreed that it was the best cake, having both strawberry and chocolate together, when they were maybe twelve or thirteen and mixing random cake batters together one day when it was raining and they were bored. Plus, as they got older, they realized that it was romantic, like the chocolate covered strawberries of cake. The only drink served there would be champagne, and that punch, well, and of course, punch for the kids, which would be on a separate table, so that Brooke would know which one to spike…

Peyton sighed. Lucas' wedding on the other hand…Well, she imagined it would be much like the one that he and Lindsey had arranged, or perhaps his hopes were more like the one that he had in Vegas. No, Peyton decided, his wedding would be more like the first one. The second wedding was one that a broken Lucas had decided on. It was his fallback plan; his original plan would be much more classy and elegant and conventional. He'd let people throw the birdseed after the wedding if it's what made them happy. He'd want the cake that would make his bride happy, but Peyton thought of him as more of a vanilla cake kind of man. The cake would be in sheets, because it would be easier to serve, and there would be beautiful sayings on the top of each one. One would probably be chocolate, to balance out the vanilla cake, and the two would not intermingle unless the bride had chosen something different. He would go with a black limo, because he would believe it was the most elegant of cars, and in the back, he would keep two glasses, filled with something fruity and alcoholic, for the ride to the airport. If Nathan had his way, there would be cans tied on the back of the car, and Lucas wouldn't mind. Lindsey wouldn't have either. Brooke might.

Peyton's wedding…Well, she knew that she wanted the same kind of cake as Brooke, strawberry and chocolate swirled with vanilla frosting, but honestly, other than that, she was flexible. She liked the idea of her convertible being used, but honestly, any convertible would do for the ride to the airport. She would want dibs on the music, but other than that, she was flexible on the rest. Whoever she was marrying could help with that.

No. Peyton Sawyer had to stop thinking about weddings. Instead, she could focus on anything. Anything like…the current wallpaper on her computer. Fireworks. Yes, fireworks. They were pretty. In fact, once, Peyton remembered sitting with the gang at the Fourth of July fireworks display, and she was with Lucas, but he had gone off with Nathan to find Skills or something. So, she was with Brooke, and the fireworks had started, and he wasn't back yet, and somehow by the middle of the display, Brooke and Peyton found their hands intertwined. Haley and Rachel were fine, sitting without the guys, but Brooke and Peyton always liked to be able to cuddle with someone during fireworks. Fireworks were so romantic, and so it wasn't the girls' fault that by the end of the show, Brooke was sitting in front of Peyton, with her arms wrapped around her stomach. Peyton's head was resting on Brooke's shoulder until Lucas had interrupted them with a chuckle, "Mind if I take my girlfriend back, Brooke?" The brunette had made a sassy remark, something about his being too late, but she had moved anyway, and Peyton's hand intertwined with Luke's.

Lucas was a good guy, but he couldn't always be there. Like the time with the fireworks, Brooke was a good replacement for him. Though, Brooke had come first, maybe she wasn't the replacement. Maybe Lucas was the replacement. He began to fill in little bits of Peyton's and Brooke's life with his own. He was a good addition, but thinking back, Peyton had expected a lot from him. He had told her, almost as soon as she had met him, that he wanted her, including a relationship with her. Then, he had wanted Brooke. Peyton had wanted Lucas, but she didn't ever want anything to change with Brooke either. She didn't wanted things with Brooke to change even more than she wanted Lucas. Peyton wanted Brooke. Fuck. Peyton wanted Brooke.

She loved Lucas, but she had let him go. He asked her to marry him, and she had said no. Peyton wouldn't have said no to Brooke. When Brooke had refused to talk to her, she hadn't taken "no" for an answer, and she had fought for them. She hadn't left just because Brooke had an obnoxious boyfriend, like she did when she saw Lucas with Lindsey. She could have fought for him years ago, but she didn't. The idea of Lucas Scott is amazing, but the reality is Brooke Davis. The blonde suddenly realized that everything made sense. Brooke was her first kiss. Brooke was almost always there for her, minus that brief time with the Lucas fiasco. Lucas Scott was what Peyton wished she wanted, she tried to want him, but it was Brooke. It was always Brooke. If it was meant to be Lucas, she would have fought for him. Peyton Sawyer got off of her bed to change the vinyl, and she was suddenly glad that she had decided to stop crying a couple of days ago. Her revelation called for a new soundtrack for her life; she was in love with her best friend.