A/N: WOOOOOOHOOOOOOO! I have a feeling this is going to be one of those stories that has like 40969 reviews haha i hope it does and I hope they're all good! I am so sick of fanfic cliches so here we go!
Hi, my name is Alexzandra Night Darkness and I'm goth, in case you didn't already guessed. I have long straight hair that's dyed black, with red at the ends. My favorite store is Hot Topic, and I go there every day! Well, when I'm not at Hogwarts, that is. You see, I'm a witch. Now before you light the torches, hear me out. I'm a good witch. Even though I love dark and depressing things, like slitting my wrists and listening to Evanescence, I still consider myself a nice person. So don't hurt me!
One morning, I woke up in my coffin-shaped bed (isn't that totally cool!) and got dressed. I slipped out of my Puddle of Mudd t-shirt and put on a black shirt with puffy shoulders and lace around the collar. It might sound girly but it was really gothic! I then put on a short skirt that had safety pins stuck into it, and fishnet stockings underneath. I put my hair up in pigtails (Because that's what this one girl at Hot Topic told me to do) and looked at myself in the mirror. "Who wouldn't want to be my boyfriend?" I wondered to myself. I walked upstairs and--oh, did I mention that I sleep in the catacombs of Hogwarts? Yeah, Dumbledore gave me special permission. Okay, well, it wasn't Dumbledore, it was Snape, head of Slytherin house, which of course, the house I'm in. I'm the only one down there and at night I write depressing songs while playing my organ (that's like a big piano). I also like to blast my stereo really loud while tying a rope around my neck, attaching the other end of it to a bar on my ceiling and getting my cat to kick the chair out from underneath me. But don't worry! I have special flying powers so I can lift myself up when I begin to feel woozy. One time I stayed up there so long that there was a dark blueish purple mark around my neck for three months! It looked like a gothic choker, which was awesome, but still kind of ironic, considering what I had almost just done to myself!
Anywho, I went upstairs and into the Great Hall to eat breakfast. But I was surprised to find that there was no one there. I asked Nearly Headless Nick where everyone was and he said that there was a Quidditch match that day and they were all out on the pitch.
"Oh," I said. I hate Quidditch so I went back down to the catacombs. For a while I listened to My Chemical Romance, but then I decided that I'd take a bath instead. I walked into my bathroom, which had black and red draperies all over. I pushed my Emily the Strange shower curtain out of the way and began to fill the bathtub with my favorite thing...blood! Then I put my favorite blood scented bubblebath in.
As I soaked for the next couple of hours, I thought about a lot of depressing things. Such as how I'd like to die (I decided on getting a nailgun shot through my head, because that way, the blood flowing down my face would compliment my eyeliner), and what is the best way to slit your wrists (I figured with my vampire teeth). When I got out of the tub later on, and into my black bathrobe, I put on some heavy black eyeliner and black lipstick. I looked so hot!
I got dressed and went upstairs again. By now, the Quidditch match was over and apparently the stupid Gryffindors won. Oh well, I thought, I don't like Quidditch anyway. Then Dumbledore said he had an announcement and we all sat down at our House tables.
He stood before us and cleared his throat "I would like to announce," he began, "Some changes to the stores at Hogsmeade. First we are putting in a Bed Bath and Beyond, for all your personal needs." Some people started clapping. "We are also opening a Sharper Image store I can buy myself one of those massage chairs." More clapping. "And lastly, we'll be adding a Hot Topic." I couldn't believe it! My dream had come true! I clapped harder than anybody else. I was so happy that I got up and starting singing a depressing song by Good Charlotte. Everyone looked at me and laughed but then I spit at them and ran out of the Great Hall singing
I
ripped out
his throat
and called you on the telephone to
take
off my diguise
Just in time to hear you cry
When you, you
mourned the death of your bloody valentine
The night he died
You
mourned the death of your bloody valentine
One last time
Good Charlotte Rocks! I was extremely happy so I went back to my tomb and hung myself. Thank Gothicness that I have that flying ability because I would have died that night because I stayed there hanging so long. I probably would have let myself die, because death is fun but hello? I mean, they were putting in a Hot Topic.
