At a bustling night, on an airport, there I sat, playing with my fingernails as I tried to keep myself down. My heart can't stop beating; I'm basically counting the seconds as time passed away slowly. My mind was all filled with him as I can't believe the sudden news I got from my friend.

"Shirou, please come. Gouenji is…" The next few words made my heart stopped. I gripped my phone tightly as I repeated the same sentence to Hiroto. He couldn't say anything more than asking me to come there. Still in my usual clothes, I immediately took a cab to the airport and bought a plane ticket to Inazuma. My mind was at mess. He, of all people and Fudou, why him? Why? That was the only question I had at that time. But of all people I could have blamed for this, I chose myself. I drove him into this. And now I'm wishing that time could turn back.

I silently stared at the white building in front of me. This place brought me memories, my time with him as I spend my time there because of my leg. He took care of me; fed me even though my arms were perfectly fine. Sometimes he even brought me stuffed bear; the kind that he usually brings to Yuuka. He used to. Hiroto brought me to my senses and guided me to where he rested. Hiroto opened the door slowly and there he was sleeping on the hospital bed. The cardiac monitor showed nothing; somebody had unplugged it. Even though so, without that thing turned on, I knew that the man in front of me was long gone.

After hearing the sound of closed door behind me, I took a seat next to him. For long, he had his platinum blonde hair down and azure highlights by the end, which made him looked hotter in my eyes. I never told him that, but there were a lot more things I haven't told him yet. Beneath the white fabric covering his body, I could see his usual "Ishido Shuuji" outfit still attached to him. To me, Ishido was the guy I hate, not only because he stole Hakuren from me once, also because Ishido didn't want to reveal his true feelings to his "old" friends.

"And you told me I'm always keeping secrets from you" I muttered as tears started to fall on my cheeks. His skin was pale and as I hold his hand; no more warmth came from him. On his arm, I saw holes. I couldn't make out what was reality what was not. Thinking that I may have been dreaming all this time and he was still alive didn't help me at all. Hiroto had explained to me what happened to him. Drugs, that word that I couldn't believe to be used together with his name. With shaky hand, I traced one of the holes on his left arm. My heart hurt as I felt the damage he did to himself. If I were with him, could I have changed it? Regrets began to fill my mind as I cried over the last moments I spent with him.

"I'm so sorry, Shirou" I can still remember his voice clearly. Two days ago, in front of Raimon he told me "Stay with me"

I wished I had said "yes" but my mouth reflexively told him "no". He didn't say any more word. With a heavy heart I left him there as I catch my flight to my hometown. In two long days, I spent my time in alone my house; just like all of those times I had without him by my side. I couldn't give him a second chance, my ego was all I could think about.

"Shuuya" His name felt like a dozen of lightning struck me at a same time. My tears started to drop on his arm. I sobbed as quiet as I can, but my hurting heart forced me to let out more tears than I can handle. Suddenly, I cried like a little kid who was begging for a toy. But in reality, I was begging him to not leave me.

"I know it's far too late, Shuuya, but… I love you" I muttered. I inched closer to his face, kissing him for the last time and the first time since we broke up 10 years ago. I wish I could, no, wishes were meaningless at this point. A loud knock interrupted my thoughts and the door opened a little.

"Shirou, we have to go" said my friend, Hiroto as he looked at me with sadness in his eyes. I quickly wiped my eyes as a nurse came in and covered Shuuya's face with the white fabric. With a deep sigh, I faced Shuuya for the last time as if I can see his handsome face beneath the fabric.

"Goodbye Shuuya"