The morning sun rises on the horizon, and the light is just touching the surface of the sand domes in the burning desert. It was then that Sora awoke to find himself in the middle of this burning wasteland.
He stood up and looked at his surroundings; there was nothing but sand and scattered members of Organization XIII along with his friends Donald, Goofy, and Jiminy. It took a moment but eventually he had a flashback of how the hell they ended up in that place in the first place.
FLASHBACK:
They were having an epic battle (one totally unrelated to the series). It was a matter of utmost importance that they destroyed the ultimate weapon in the Organization's possession.
"Donald! Goofy! We have to get that thing away from them at all costs, or else the whole world will be in danger!"
"But, uh," Goofy started, "isn't the world already in danger because of them?"
"Yes, but this will mean certain destruction of the human race!"
"Uh that was their whole point in the first place-
"GOOFY LOOK OUT!" But it was too late, out of the barrel of the cannon came the undeniable horror that is…THE TAMPON!!!!!!! It was whizzing straight towards Goofy and he simply stared dumbfounded at it, too stupid to actually get out of the way of course.
"NOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!" screamed Sora and he leapt in between the two of them and took the full blow of…THE TAMPON!!!!!!
"Ugh, cough I'm…hit," stammered out Sora. He lay on the ground, looking hurt and unconscious, after a few moments Goofy became bored and began to kick him in the head. He found it amusing and continued to do it with a stupid laugh.
"Sora," stated Donald, "ithingkhyoubetytrergetup (I think you better get up)." As you all know Donald talks almost incomprehensively so I will be providing what it sounds like he's saying along with what he's actually talking about.
"Oh, my fun is ruined!" Sora complains pouting.
"Hahahahaha the world is at the palm of our hands!" laughed Xigbar with his Tampon gun of doom.
"Dude, Xigbar, aren't you taking this a little too seriously?" asked Axel with an anime sweat drop. "I mean seriously he's gonna kick our asses over a gun that shoots feminine products."
"It must be done! MUHAHAHAHAHA! NOW …IT IS TIME TO PRESS…THE BIG RED BUTTON!"
"What? XIGBAR NOOOOOOOO!" But it was too late, Xigbar pressed it and a blinding white light engulfed them all, and they all blacked out.
END FLASHBACK:
During this flashback the rest of them woke up and were enjoying the show through the giant thought bubble above Sora's head.
"Hey Axel," Xigbar asked. "How did you know that the big red button would transport us all to the desert for us to slowly rot away without any food or water and also to be stuck with the last people on any world that we'd like to be with?"
"I didn't," stated Axel plainly. "I just know that in any TV show or anything related to anime, the big red button always F----S everyone up. So thanks a lot Xigbar."
"Hey everyone how did Xemnas, Larxene, and Roxas get here?" asked Sora.
"Y'know, I have no idea myself." Stated Xemnas. "I was debating on how to get rid of all gay people in the world when I found myself here."
"What's wrong with gay people?!" asked Roxas, Xigbar, and Axel at the same time.
"You're why," Xemnas added simply with a deep sigh.
"We're not gay we're just British!" (All copyrights for that line go to LittleKuriboh for the Yugioh abridged series. Please, no British people come beat me up, I love the British!)
"Well anyway guys," Sora continued, "I'm bored, LET'S PLAY DARE!"
"What's Dare?" asked Larxene.
"It's like Truth or Dare but without the Truth, so that the only thing left is mindless torture for the entertainment of the others around them!"
"BugtSorya! (But Sora!) Theity'erourmoeroutalenemies (They're our mortal enemies) wietcantpeltaywithtiehem (we can't play with them)!"
Shut up Donald, just for that you're going first!" Sora said angrily. "I dare you to go away and you'll be replaced with Scrooge!"
"Fjsigonsdflsajf6983o2ri3jfl xojso arw84ur w ov8vfunfvvwo8u4cmo88! (What!)" But before he could rant anymore, everyone, including the organization members, picked up Donald and, using a conjured up catapult, tied him up on it and flung him across the desert.
"I like money," commented Scrooge as he magically appeared.
"Ha ha, we love you too Scrooge!" Sora said.
"Hey everyone, conference!" Xemnas ordered. All the organization members got into a huddle and began their conference.
"This could bode well for us," Xemnas commented slyly.
"What do you mean boss?" asked Xigbar.
"If we keep this up and don't go insane ourselves, then by the end of this, they'll have destroyed each other and we'll be free to destroy the world!"
"But…I don't want to destroy the world, I like the world," said Roxas.
"Yeah, I agree with Roxas," added Axel, "I love all the flowers and the trees and-
"OH will you just shut up!" Larxene shouted. "First of all Roxas, how the hell are you here anyway? You disappeared at the beginning of the game so you don't get an opinion. And as for you two," she gestured to Xigbar and Axel, "I haven't forgotten about how you stole all of my pretties, so if I hear either one of you complain throughout this whole game, I will cut off each of your balls, make you eat them raw, and then strangle you with your own inte-
"OKAY, OKAY! WE'LL DO IT!"
-restingly assorted ties!" (NOTE: I didn't come up with that line either. Please look up the tampon gun comic on Deviantart to find the original creator.)
"Okay then," Xemnas said, also beginning to fear Larxene's wrath, "Hey Sora old chum!"
"Yes Lucky charms?"
Xemnas pondered the name for a minute but then continued, "We'll play this game with you, but let's make a rule that no matter what the person challenged cannot refuse the dare."
"Okay! Let's go!" Sora cried eagerly.
"Okay then," Xemnas said slyly, "I dare you Sora to-
"Wait, I want to go first!" Larxene interrupted.
"But Larxene-
"I…WANT…TO…GO…FIRST!!!!!!!!!"
"O-okay," Xemnas cowered.
"I dare Sora to eat 100 Peeps!"
"What!" Xemnas exclaimed. "Larxene what about the plan?"
"Shut up! Or do you want the same fate as the others if you interrupt me?"
"Oh god NO! OKAY I'll be good!"
"That's better, now Sora," Larxene conjured up 100 Peeps out of thin air, "start eating!"
"Okay! I love Peeps!" Sora exclaimed, and he began eating as Xemnas began counting aloud.
"1…2…uh F—k…5"
SEVERAL HOURS LATER
"98…99…100!" As they reached one hundred , Sora placed the last one in his mouth and swallowed.
"Uh, Sora?" asked Jiminy.
"Sora swayed for a moment and then finally collapsed on the ground, passed out."
"Oh, good work Larxene!" Xemnas complimented. "I had no idea that was your real plan."
"Real plan?"
Xemnas sighed, "You were just playing the game weren't you?"
"Enough talk, let's play! Who's next?"
"Oh, oh, let me go next!" called out Scrooge. "I choose…THIS NICKEL!"
Everyone stared dumbfounded at his choice for the next challenger, "I dare you Mr. Nickel…to marry me!"
Silence for a moment, "HE SAID 'YES'! Come my love, let us go to Canada. America might not support our kind of romance, but Canada makes everything better." And the two of them rode off into the sunset. On what? You'll have to wait for the next chapter to find out!
TO BE CONTINED…
A/N: Okay, this was also a prize for a good friend of mine. I can't believe I finished it before the beginning of classes but here it is, hope you like it. Please Review! ARIGATO
