Darth Maul Went to the Hangar

Author's Note: This is based on 'The Devil Went Down to Georgia,' by The Charlie Daniels Band. Yeehaw!
Disclaimer: The tune belongs to the abovementioned band, all the characters and places belong to Star Wars c/o George Lucas.


Darth Maul went to the hangar, he was looking for a Jedi to kill
'Cause Sidious made him just for a grin and simply laughed a li'l
When he came across two of them with lightsabers glowing and hot
Darth Maul threw off his pitch-black cloak and said "Lemme tell you what."
"I guess you didn't know but the Sith aren't extinct
And if you care to take a dare I'll whup your ass you prick
Now you have a pretty saber, man, to give a wimp his due
I'll slam my saber of red against your head and I know I'm better'n you."
They said then "We are Jedi, and you are but a Sith
We have the power of light and life, and you serve naught but death."

Qui-Gon turn on your lightsaber, ply your green blade hard
'Cause hell's broke loose on Naboo, and Darth Maul is at large
Now if you win you get to get there and save Queeny's arse
But if you lose you both will buy the farm!

Darth Maul turned on both the blades and said "I'll start this fight."
And quick he flew through the smelly air like a black-winged bat of night.
And he gave out blow after blow, and did some real neat stunts
All the while grinning like they were stupid runts.

(Music)

When they got down to the melting pit Maul sliced Qui-Gon in half
Obi-Wan got near destroyed by Horn-Head's Sithly wrath!

Hanging from a metal pipe!
Maul's above you with that energy spike
Feel the Force within you, Obi-Wan
And avenge your good Master, Qui-Gon!

The Sith Lord fell in half when Kenobi ran him through
(I swear, someday in the near future, Sidious will sue)
Qui-Gon said, "Obi-Wan, you must train the boy for me
Yoda might say, 'Balance bring to the Force will he.'"

End of the film- Federation croaked
Council realized Darth Maul wasn't a hoax
Anakin will be trained by Obi-Wan
Just watch out- there'll be a Darth Maul clone!