A/N: Hey! A very quick word before the story. As most of my fics, this got inspired by a song and therefore has been named after the song. Thanks to Avenged Sevenfold for the amazing song Seize the Day. Go listen to it, it's beautiful. And as always, thanks to JKR for writing Harry Potter. I own nothing, but I truly am fascinated by her marvellous work. And yet another thanks shall be given to Jessica who as always is a great beta!
Seize the Day
His eyes caught hers from the other side of the room. It was only for a short second, but that short second was enough to make her breathless, feel sad, lonely, and forget what she was about to do. Just then, everyone grabbed hold of their hats, throwing them upwards. Way too late, she grabbed hers too, only throwing it half a metre before it landed on the floor among the others.
She watched as Cassandra grabbed Anthony around the neck, planting a short kiss on his lips. Mary was hugging Rob, her parents making their way through the crowd. Sirius was kissing Tanya and Peter was holding Dana, talking to their parents. Everyone had someone. Even Alice's two years older boyfriend, Frank, had come to see her graduate and was now kissing her. Everyone had someone. Everyone but her. Oh yeah, and him. But even he was hugging his parents, standing next to his only single friend, Remus. But her… it was too late for her.
With a heavy sigh she bent down and picked up the hat. She looked around before she made her way through the crowd. Parents with their freshly graduated children were all smiling. A few bumped into her on her way out. She apologized and continued.
The air outside was cold, yet with the warm touch of summer. She sat on the stairs silently. Only a few hours to go. Everyone was attending the party, they had made sure to happen in the Great Hall as soon as their families had gone home. Who was she to stay back in the tower? It was her graduation after all. It was her happy time. Or it should be.
Two hours later, Lily still sat outside. Goosebumps had risen on her arms, but she didn't want to go inside again. The party had long started, and that just made her even eager to stay outside. Drunken people tended to snog the people they liked, and snogging was not something she wanted to look at.
She didn't hear the steps behind her and she didn't notice him approaching before he'd sat down next to her, two glasses in his hands. She looked up at him. His hazel eyes were searching the grounds behind the glasses. His hair was somewhat flat compared to his usual mane of dishevelled hair. He wore a suit too. It was formal, though with a hint of casual. His tie was pink. She wondered why for a second, but came to the conclusion it was only for the fun of it. It didn't suit him though. She looked at her own green dress; it was so cliché she had decided to wear it.
"Hi," he said, still not looking at her.
"Hey…"
He handed her the glass. "Here. Non-alcoholic punch."
"Thanks," she said with a smile. She sipped it, looking over the grounds just as he. "How did you know I was out here?"
"You've been gone for so long," he said honestly. "In fact I was beginning to wonder where you'd gone."
She smiled. Of course he had noticed. It was stupid of her to think she could disappear for so long without him noticing. Though she had begun to believe she wasn't that important to him anymore, apparently she had been wrong. He still watched her every movement. The thought made her smile even more.
"So why are you out here instead of enjoying our party?" he asked. He placed his glass on the step and leaned back, supporting on his elbows on the top of the staircase.
She sighed. "I don't know," she lied.
He settled with that answer and didn't speak. She quickly looked at him, but he was looking the opposite way. She sipped to the punch again. It tasted like orange, but sweeter than normal orange juice did. She liked it. She placed the glass on the stairs. It clinked softly.
"What about you?" she asked.
He sighed. "The same I guess."
She didn't answer, but kept her eyes on the grounds. The wind began to blow, making her hair flutter in the wind and an unwilling tremble rushed through her body from bottom to top and her breath came out loud and rasped. He looked at her for the first time, but she didn't meet his gaze.
"You're freezing." It wasn't a question.
Lily pulled her shoulders almost unnoticeably. Out of the corner of her eyes, she could see him shrug off his jacket. She would protest, but knew he wouldn't listen to her. Without one word, he placed the jacket on her shoulders. It was warm and soft. The natural scent of him tickled in her nose, making her feel comfortable. She looked at him and their eyes met for the first time since he'd come. She broke the contact at once. Slowly he scooted over next to her. He didn't say anything.
"Thanks," she muttered.
He still kept quiet. Looking up at him, she found that he was looking at the sky. He seemed thoughtful, yet relaxed and at ease. She looked away as she was sure he could feel her gaze.
"So," he said all of a sudden, "why don't you tell me what you're really doing outside?"
She smiled. "You probably wouldn't understand."
"I could always try."
"It's silly."
"Not if you're sitting out here because of it."
She glanced furtively at him. "It's really complicated."
"Try me."
"All my friends are in there," she said.
"So are mine."
She snorted softly at his try of involvement. "I know. But… Well, they've all got someone…" She watched him as he frowned.
"Yeah?"
She looked away, this would sound so stupid. "And… well, I don't."
He nodded. "That doesn't sound so silly."
She shook his head. "That's not all."
"It isn't?"
She looked away. How stupid could she be to place herself in this situation? He would see right through it. Of course. He was moving a bit next to her and she could feel his gaze on her, but she didn't look back at him. She took a deep breath.
"You see… I once had the chance to be one of them." She looked straight ahead. "Once… Once I had the chance to fall in love too."
He cleared his throat. "Yeah?"
She nodded. "But… then I started to push this guy away. This crazy awesome guy which was everything I could dream of when looking past his façade." She closed her eyes. "I think I pushed him away…" She trailed off.
He tensed slightly. "This guy you're talking about…" He was looking away too. "Does he know you feel like this?"
She shook her head. "No, I don't think so. And to be honest, he deserves to know." She looked at him. "James?"
He looked at her. "Yes?"
She opened her mouth to speak, but just then loud voices were heard. She looked towards the big oak doors and then Sirius tumbled outside along with Remus and Peter.
"Prongs mate!" Sirius yelled. Drunk. He walked fast forward and nearly tumbled into Lily who jumped away. Sirius looked between them. "I didn't interrupt something, did I?"
She stood up, his jacket falling to the ground. "No, doesn't matter. I was to be going anyway."
As she rushed away she could hear him grumble something to his friends. She took an unsteady breath and closed the doors to the inside behind her. Then she leaned against the doorframe, trying to slow down her heart. So close. She didn't even know if she wanted to tell him, but those friends of his had definitely ruined it all. She suddenly found that there was something about this evening she was looking forward too. She didn't have to see him again after this. Yet it filled her with sadness. She closed her eyes and with a heavy sigh she decided she might as well go and enjoy the party while she could.
She found Cassandra in the corner farthest away from the doors. Her eyes widened at the sight of Lily and she rushed to her side.
"Oh, Lily!" she exclaimed. "Where have you been?"
Lily shrugged. "Outside."
"You got me nervous there," she muttered. "And James too and he said he'd go look for you. Did he find you?"
"Yeah," she said. "James found me."
Cassandra looked around. "Where is he now?"
"With the other guys."
Lily suddenly felt one of Cassandra's hands at her cheek. "Lily, is something wrong? You seem a bit… I don't know… down?"
She shook her head. "I'm fine. It's just sad it's all over." It was only halfway a lie.
Cassandra grabbed her hand and pulled her a bit away from the crowd, closer to the doors. She looked at her concerned. "Lily, seriously, what's wrong?"
"Nothing," Lily said and shook her head again. "I'm fine."
"Oh, don't lie!" Cassandra said and exhaled sharply. "You're a bad liar."
The door to the Entrance Hall burst open and Sirius, Remus, and Peter entered. Only one person wasn't to be seen and it was the person Lily had hoped to see. Her eyes followed their backs as they walked across the room and stopped at the drinks table. She watched them almost a minute, and first removed her gaze when Cassandra elbowed her.
"Lily!"
"Uhu?"
"Look at me!" Lily did. "What's wrong with you?"
She sighed. "It's nothing. Um, I'll just go find James, I forgot to tell him something." She turned.
"Oh sure," Cassandra replied sarcastically. "Don't tell Cassandra anything. She's used to that!"
Lily smiled as she passed a few people. She stopped with her hands at the doors. Would she even want to go out there? She took a deep breath. Seize the day, her grandmother had always said, seize the day or die regretting the time you lost.
And she pushed. Her eyes travelled across the walls, doors and windows, but stopped at the staircase. He sat there, looking into his hands. His jacket lay next to him. He looked so… vulnerable, so fragile even though she knew that wasn't the case.
With her shoes clicking softly she walked towards him. He didn't look up. First when she stopped in front of him he looked up, though not at her eyes, more just at her figure, but she was sure he knew it was her.
"Mind if I join you?" she asked. Even with the music from the Great Hall her voice seemed too loud.
He moved a bit to let her know she could sit down. "Sorry about them before," he muttered. "They always seem to interrupt at bad times."
She smiled and sat down next to him, curling her legs up on the step below the one she at on. "I don't think they're doing it on purpose."
"I bet they are."
She looked into her hands, feeling the heavy silence on her shoulders. "So…"
"So what?" he asked, the silence was bothering him too.
She shrugged. "Nothing… I guess."
He laughed. It was silent yet a bit harsh. "So you came out here to nothing?"
"Actually…" she said and made him look at her. "I came to ask how that guy is doing."
She could almost hear him tense and he hardly breathed. He slowly turned his gaze away from her and she looked into her hands again. The seconds ticked by, and for each second she got more nervous. Had she crossed the line? Maybe it was too late?
At last he cleared his throat. "He's fine... Though, you're mistaken…" She looked at him, but he didn't move his gaze. "I don't think he ever really gave up on you."
She looked away from him. "You don't?"
"Nope. He's a really stubborn prat to be honest."
She chuckled. "Do you think he can forgive me?"
He smiled, still looking away. "There has never been anything to forgive."
She smiled. "You're too sweet."
He didn't reply and she quickly stole a glance at him. He noticed and caught her gaze before she looked away again. He smiled and they broke the contact again.
"So this boy…" he mused, studying the ceiling of the empty Hall, "Does he still have a chance with you?"
"That really depends on him," she said, looking at him.
His eyes flashed. "It does?"
She nodded, but as he couldn't see that he moved his gaze to her. He raised his eyebrows at her. She nodded again.
"Yes," she whispered.
His eyes flashed in between hers. He was thinking. With an almost unnoticeable sigh he leaned closer and softly placed his lips on hers. She closed her eyes and kissed him back. She suppressed the urge to groan when he pulled away.
"I guess that would be okay for the guy to do," he said, looking upwards while leaning back against the stairs, coolly.
She shrugged. "Only if it wasn't the last time."
He grinned and a small laugh escaped him. "It definitely wasn't."
"Then it's okay."
He glanced at her out of the corner of his eye. "So tell me, was it really because of this you sat outside in the first place?"
"Partly," she admitted. "Though I had no idea you'd come looking for me."
"How could I not?" he asked and raised both his eyebrows. "Don't you want to go into your party?" he asked.
She rolled her eyes. "Our party," she corrected him. "And I guess so."
"Such enthusiasm," he smirked.
"I'd rather just stay here with the stubborn prat."
"He'll follow you in there," he said and nodded at the door sin to the Great Hall. He got up, holding out a hand. "Come on."
She grabbed the hand he pulled her up, close to his body. She smiled as he planted a short kiss on her lips and then guided her towards the doors, his hand on her waist. For the first time that evening she felt she could enter that party and in fact enjoy her last night at the school.
She had him at her side after all.
The End.
