Disclaimer: All characters (including streaking!France) belong to Hidekaz Himaruya!
Warning: shounen-ai
Enjoy! 8D
The World Meeting conference ended abruptly AGAIN when France got bored and started streaking. What's worse was that Spain and Prussia joined in after consuming a lot of alcohol and every nation in the building set out in teams to catch the slippery streakers (XD). Germany lead the team that hunted for Prussia, England lead the team that searched for France (though he vowed that he'd be the one to strangle him because France interrupted his grand speech earlier) and Romano angrily warned everybody that HE is the one who'll capture Spain, but Belgium made 'big brother' Netherlands join in his team. Everyone knows that because of the 2010 Football World Cup Final defeat, they can tell Netherlands wanted to do nothing more than kick Spain in the tomatoes.
The Nordics sat quietly in their group as they waited for the Bad Touch Trio to be captured, but Denmark got bored of waiting after 2 minutes and without difficulty, he slung Norway over his shoulder and ran out, laughing like a maniac. As the Dane used to be a Viking, nothing could beat his strength. Finland sweatdropped and Sweden had an image of him carrying his wife in a wife-carrying contest like the ones back in his home country. Iceland grumbled and said that he'll help out because "having me help out will end this silly business and we'll be home before dark."
And so he left.
Little known to him was that France was stalking him...
"Bonjour, Icey!" he cheered and Iceland jumped and spun quickly.
"France, give up already, everybody's looking for you," Iceland said, a little angry he was caught off by surprise. (Thank goodness France censored himself with a rose...)
"Non!" France laughed. "Prussia and Spain are giving everyone the slip and moi? Still not caught!"
"I'm warning you, I can call Denmark over here and tell him you touched Norway," Iceland said ominously. "And we all know what happens if we do so much as talk to my big brother..."
France ignored him, though he had the thoughts in his head already. "You'll have to catch me first! But guess what - how about I let you catch me personally and in exchange, you do a little something for me?"
Iceland looked at his face, cautious. "What's in it for me if you let me catch you? How will it benefit you?"
France held out his hand so that it's within Iceland's reach with a smirk. "Just catch me and you'll see."
Iceland raised an eyebrow at him, but he reached out, and France snatched his hand away just as he was about to grasp it.
"I thought you said you let me catch you," he glared at the Frenchman.
"I said: catch me," France said, in a testing way.
Iceland reached out again to grasp his hand, but France dodged it.
"Let me catch you!" Iceland yelled and lunged, but fell and France stretched an arm out to catch him.
"Non! I got you now!" he heard France laugh and the Frenchman started running, carrying the yelling Icelander.
"Put me down or you'll suffer!" Iceland shouted, struggling to kick to the Frenchman. France had a strong grip on him.
"You'll thank me for this later~!" France sang.
Meanwhile, with Denmark and Norway…
"Huh? Did you hear something, Norge?" Denmark asked when he heard something odd.
"No... BECAUSE YOU HAVEN'T PUT ME DOWN YET!"
"Whoops! But I LIKE carrying you!" the rowdy Dane sniggered and put Norway down.
Norway glared at him. "Was it really necessary to carry me like that?"
"Yes."
"I hate you."
"I love you too. Hahaha!"
Meanwhile, with England…
"Where's that bloody wanker?" England growled, running into another room alone and looked around.
England split off from the main search party group because he was getting impatient and he felt he was getting slowed down, so he went ahead.
So now he's in the room alone...
...Until something flew over his head, blacking out his vision.
Later…
"...U... uhh... what happened...?" a voice mumbled and Iceland turned to England, who was lying next to him in a dark closet.
"France threw you in here," Ice said simply.
England was lying right next to Ice so close, he could feel his snow-white air brush softly on his cheeks. England's cheeks flared red and he shuffled away.
"Bloody hell..." he mumbled, not taking his eyes off Ice's amethyst-purple ones.
"What?" Ice snapped, "when you're done being weird, help me bust the door down."
"O-okay..." England stood up, but his body brushed against Ice's and the cold nation pushed him furiously.
"Get off me!" he complained.
"It's not me! This stupid closet's too small!" England ranted.
"Ohonhonhonhonhonhon... too small huh? I thought it's perfect for a lovely time!"
Ice and England glanced at the door. They threw themselves at the door at the same time and screamed "FRANCE!" in unison.
"Ohonhon! Getting eager already? But you two must kiss if I'm to unlock the door!" France's cocky voice spoke through the keyhole.
"Kiss what?" England said blankly. He heard Ice face-palm himself.
"Oui! You two should kiss each other and then I'll unlock the door!" France instructed.
"NO WAY!" England ranted, but Iceland didn't say anything. He slammed himself against the door again, but it was strong.
"We're at Switzerland's house, so they won't be able to hear your screams because of the padded walls and doors, even I have to talk through the keyhole just for you two to liste-"
Iceland had a sudden idea. He swiftly punched the keyhole and it shook the door.
SLAM!
"Mon Dieu!" France shrieked, jumping.
Iceland sniggered evilly. "Thanks for the idea, now let us out!"
France smirked. "Not until I hear you two make out!"
England could feel Ice looking at him hopelessly.
"Listen, France, I'm NOT going to make out with England!" Ice ranted.
When France waffled about conditions, England felt through the darkness and held Iceland's warm hand. He leaned over and whispered something, blushing wildly. Iceland looked at him incredulously, but he nodded and leaned forward...
Outside the Closet…
France got suspicious when he heard nothing, but then his ears detected whispers and the sound of clothes being shuffled and moved. He could swear he heard a groan that sounded like Iceland's and boots thudding against the floor.
"Are we REALLY gonna do this here?" That sounded like Iceland.
"Why not? This is a great place to start..."
Thud!
France's couldn't believe his ears. England and Iceland are actually doing it? And it sounded like a full make-out session too!
He just grinned and continued to listen.
"A-ah...! Not there!"
"That's not what your blush says."
A smooching sound was heard.
"Get your hand out of my ass!" (A needy squeak, France noted.)
"But it's so cute and round!" (France almost died when he heard that.)
"...Round? Seriously?"
'Ouch! Talk about killing the mood, Angleterre!' France thought, tutting.
"How about I find out and see?"
"Eh-heh... go undo them then!"
Blood trickled out of France's nose.
"N-nooo! You're going too fast!"
"I'm sorry... I can't hold it back any longer..."
"Be gentle at least!"
Kiss.
"I will."
France was going to faint from blood loss when someone hit the back of his head with a frying pan and he collapsed to the ground, unconscious. Hungary was going to cheer when she heard the suggestive sounds coming from behind the closet door. Now SHE'S got a nosebleed and after a while, she heard the moans growing more loudly.
"AHHH! ARTHUUUR~!"
Hungary could barely contain her fangirl squeals. If she's going to die right now, she'd die happy.
Wait - she heard squirting sounds...?
Hungary cautiously unlocked the door and a horrible sight greeted her.
Iceland and England were still fully-clothed and were standing as far apart as possible. There wasn't anything that suggested they had a hot time in the closet.
They both just stared at her, horrified.
"Err... Hungary? Did you catch Prussia yet?" England asked hesitantly, and then glanced at France, who was lying on the floor.
"...You guys pretended to have sex so that France could release you out of here?" Hungary asked, disbelieving.
"Yes, it was England's idea," Iceland frowned. "Why?"
SLAM!
"I'M NOT LETTING YOU GUYS OUT UNTIL YOU DO IT AGAIN - THIS TIME FOR REAL!" Hungary shouted from the other side of the door, nosebleeding heavily.
At that moment, Japan walked by and heard everything.
"Will you need my camera?" he politely offered. Hungary could tell he wanted some delicious footage.
"OMG yes! We MUST get this on camera!" Hungary grinned and held Japan's camera in her hand, and peeked the lenses through the keyhole.
End! ;D
A/N: Mwahahaha! Did you REALLY think I'd write a full-blown sex scene in here? I don't think so! :D
I was requested to write about this pairing by UraharaSteph on Quizilla.
