A/N: Wow, I still can't believe I'm writing a fanfiction of my own. After reading probably hundreds of stories in the merlin and Musketeers fandom, I decided to give it a chance. It's a small beginning and depending on the reactions I get I will continue or leave it as it is. As of yet, I don't really know where this story is going.

This story is set somewhere after S4 I guess, where Arthur is king and Guinevere is queen. This will probably not be a reveal fic although I might change my mind somewhere along the way. I'll let you know if it comes to that.

English is not my mother tongue and this is not beta'd so excuse me for possible mistakes. I want to learn to write better so constructive criticism is very much appreciated. Is the pace too quick, too slow, is it too much OOC ? Let me know, reviews make my day.

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Merlin's mind wandered through the trees. The edges of his vision were blurred, as if what he saw was not actually there. But he didn't care too much, he could feel the wind in his hair and feel the specks of sun on his cheeks. Arthur was there with him, a smile playing on his lips like this were the happiest of times. Merlin was almost content, almost…

At that moment the vision began the fade, trees and blue sky making place for a rank cell where darkness was his only companion. Merlin did not welcome this lucid state for it meant only pain and torment and loneliness. Exhaustion, dehydration, cuts and bruises and injuries he had forgotten about, they were all mingled together until his body was nothing more than pain.

How long had he been here? He couldn't even remember. There was no light seeping through in this rotten place to give Merlin any indication of time and it didn't seem like his captives bothered with a daily schedule as well, giving Merlin just the tiniest amount of food and water whenever they felt like it.

And then there were the drugs. They clouded his head and made him lose all sense of reality, replacing it with a world that spun from his own mind. He had dreaded it in the beginning, fighting as he could to keep control. But now, after all this time he welcomed it like a brother. He found that they were not always bad, not always filled with demons and feared perspectives. Sometimes they were almost like dreams, like the vision he just had. And even when they were full of terror, Merlin found that they could never be worse than the real world that was now his reality.

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29 days. It had been 29 days exactly since he let Merlin out of his sight. Arthur was sitting at the round table attending a council meeting but his mind was elsewhere. The very moment it happened, played out before his eyes again.

Three mercenaries were already splayed out before his feet and he was about to end the life of a fourth when he saw the fifth mercenary riding away with their horses and an unconscious Merlin slumped in his saddle. Arthur drove his sword through the man and started to run after them, but without a horse he stood no chance. The mercenary was long gone, leaving a trembling Arthur standing between the dead bodies, hoping with all his might that Merlin would be OK.

"… Sire?" Sir Leon was staring at him with a questioning look. It was obvious that he was expected to say something but he had no idea what the question was. "Excuse me gentlemen, I don't feel so well. We will continue this meeting tomorrow morning" and with that Arthur left the room.

Arthur was trembling the whole way back to his room. Merlin had been helpless and alone for almost a month now and here he was, attending useless council meetings. For all he knew he wasn't even alive anymore! He could not think like that, could not give up hope. But with every day he missed his friend more and more. He wanted Merlin at his side so badly that it even hurt him physically. At the time he had reached his chambers, he couldn't help the tears that threatened to spill from his eyes.

Guinevere was there and seeing the state he was in, pulled him close for a hug. After a while she led him to their bed but refused to let go of him. "Don't give up hope Arthur, we will find him." She whispered in his ear and like that, both seeking comfort in their embrace, they fell into a slumber.