A/N: I don't like the first chapter as much as I thought. It ended up being a little rushed, but I think it still gets its point across. And I DID NOT mean to hurt anyone's feelings through this is I mention an illness, I was just using them as examples. If I do offend you, I'm sorry.
Imagine you live in a country where you will never be accepted because of a scar on your face that you've had since you were three. Or because you were born with eyes that are two different colors. If you had a disease or illness that made you look different; like spina bifida or down syndrome, no one would talk to you. No one would spare you a glance. Imagine if your country had become so vain that if you were not a normal person, you were not a person to them.
The Amestrians had a name for those they did not speak to. They knew them as the "flawed". The "flawed" knew themselves as "people". Just like everyone else.
-- --
Edward Elric lived alone in a small apartment on a small street in a nice neighborhood. His mother died when he was much younger, and when they attempted to bring her back, Ed lost his right arm, most of his left leg, and his ability to do alchemy. His younger brother, Alphonse, lost his life, and his body disappeared. He stayed with family friends, who fixed him up with automail, but they died due to illness, and Ed was forced to move to a different part of Amestris, and forced to keep his prosthetics a secret. Otherwise, he would be treated differently. He would be shunned, beaten, possibly even killed because his body was not like everyone else's.
So he, like anyone else would have, hid them. It wasn't until one rainy day in early fall that everything changed.
-- --
"Edward!" a girl called. The boy in question looked over his shoulder as he walked down the hall, slowing his pace to let the girl catch up with him. "Edward, could you help me study for finals this week? I'm afraid I won't pass the math exam," the girl, a pretty blonde with brown eyes, stuck out her bottom lip. "Pretty please?"
Another thing Ed was known for was his intellect. He was great at math and science especially, and everyone turned to him for help.
Ed's lips turned up. "Sure, I could help you. When do you have free?"
"Only lunch break," she flipped her hair over her shoulder, and the smell of her strawberry shampoo hit him full force. She smiled. "Is that okay? Because if it's not, you can just come over this weekend…"
"No, lunch break's fine. I'll bring my book."
"Yay!" The girl threw her arms around the boy's neck in an ecstatic hug. "Thank you!" She rushed off to her next class. Ed turned and kept walking, only stopping to pick up a few books from his locker as he, too, went to his next class.
He took a seat in the back, where no one would see him if he fell asleep. It was something he did often, due to the nightmares he had while he was at home. Somehow, being surrounded by people made him feel more at ease about things. But at the same time, people were the villains in his nightmares. As he sat, he pulled his sleeve down over his right wrist more securely, so nothing could be seen.
The room was full of chatter between friends, everyone joking and laughing, girls gossiped, boys played finger football with a folded up piece of paper. Ed sat in the background, watching.
Sure, he was popular, but it wasn't because people liked him. It was because he was nice, smart, and good-looking. A while back he'd realized with a start that not a single person he knew was a true friend to him. He defined a true friend as someone who would be willing to give his (or her) life to protect you and make you happy. It was hard enough finding people who would help you with your homework, let alone give their life for yours. So he'd all but given up on finding a true friend, especially since they might change their mind after finding out his secret.
Edward's eyes were closed as he mourned the fact he'd never have a friend. He no longer had family, his friends were dead, he could never get close to anyone, and it was all his own damned fault. He was brought back from his reverie as the door closed sharply and the teacher took her place at the board, writing out detailed notes that he began to copy into his notebook. He finished before everyone else, and leaned back in his chair, fingers laced behind his head, relaxing.
He didn't fall asleep. He wouldn't let himself. Nightmares of being found out, being rejected by everyone, being hated. He didn't want that to happen. Never. It would stay his secret, but the nightmares would continue.
And nightmares were something Edward Elric was no stranger to.
-- --
When lunch time rolled around, Ed grabbed his notebook, calculator and a pencil from his locker and went to the cafeteria, where he'd promised to help that girl—whatshername—with her math. She was sitting at a secluded table in the corner, where the trees in the quad overshadowed the surrounding area. He joined her, and noticed that something about her was different. Was that…makeup? He raised an eyebrow, but ignored the simple fact, sitting down and asking her what she needed help with.
"Um… the quadratic formula, and graphing inequalities…" she said, twirling a lock of hair around her finger. She popped her gum, looking up at him.
"Alright, well, let's try a few practice problems and see where you're at. Try these," he circled a few problems on the page and slid it toward her. She opened her notebook and looked at the first one. After a minute or two of scribbling and trying the basic equations, she looked up at him again.
"I don't get it." She tucked her hair behind her ear and bit her lip. "Will you help me?"
"Sure. Which part?" Ed asked, oblivious to her advances.
"This part. I don't know where I'm supposed to substitute." Ed leaned in and marked where she should use 'x' in the rewritten equation.
"See? It's not that hard at all," he told her, smiling. He hadn't noticed how close she'd leaned in. She looked up through her eyelashes at him, pressing her breasts against his arm. Ever-oblivious Edward didn't realize until then that something was up. He looked past the makeup, and ignored her gum-popping, but when she was putting herself on him…then and only then did it begin to dawn on him.
"Um…."
"It's Mary," she said with a giggle. He hadn't been trying to remember her name, though. He pulled his arm back; away from her, but she laced her fingers in his. Luckily, it was his left, and she couldn't feel metal.
"Uhh…"
"Oh, how cute, Edward. You're blushing. You really haven't had a girlfriend before, have you?"
"Um…I'm sorry? Where did you hear that?"
"It was just a rumor. But, I guess it's true. How adorable," she licked her lips. "I could be your first," she said, eyes hooded. "Would you like that?" Her face drew closer to his. His cheeks must have been lit up like a Christmas tree.
His heart was pounding, his embarrassment clear, but the girl—Mary—ignored that, chuckling.
"N-n-n—"
"N?"
"No! Thank you! Um…" he backed away from her, arms up. "I'm not looking for a relationship! At least, not at the moment." Ed gathered his things, his blush fading on his skin. He shoved his books under one arm as he hurriedly finished his little goodbye. "However, once I start looking, you'll be my first call, okay? Okay. Bye!"
Mary was left on the bench confused and rejected, wondering where the boy had run off to so fast.
-- --
"Dammit. I should have seen that coming," he scolded himself. He was hiding out behind the gym building and planned to be there until lunch was over. He punched the wall. He didn't want it to have gotten that far and now he'll have looked like a jerk for turning down someone considered to be one of the hottest girls in school.
He, however, had long since shut off all emotions. He didn't want to get close to someone…
"Ed?"
The boy's golden eyes snapped toward the speaker, his hair flying around in the light breeze of the mid-afternoon. Roy Mustang. Edward grinned.
"How'd you find me? You weren't looking were you? Aw, how sweet."
"Don't flatter yourself. Someone said they saw you go this way. I just followed to see what the hell you were doing."
"I was just running from someone."
"Who?"
"You. I smelled your breath." Ed joked, still grinning.
"No, but seriously."
"You don't actually care, do you?"
"Of course I do, Edward! This has been working in my favor for a long time now! Some girl confesses love to you, and you –for some reason I will never be able to imagine—turn them down. Then I swoop in and save the day by offering to take her on a date to make her forget you." Roy pulled a cigarette from his pocket. The blond boy next to him guessed this was about when he smoked everyday. He took a drag before releasing it back into the air calmly. "And it usually works."
"I'd love to sit around and listen to you talk about how you use me to get chicks when you barely know me, but I've got to go to class. If you don't mind—" he excused himself, brushing off the back of his pants.
"Alright, I'll see you in chem." Ed waved without looking back.
Roy—Ed's chemistry lab partner—was the only person he'd gotten anywhere close to friendship with. And it could barely be considered friendship, since Ed felt like the entire thing could blow up any second. He marched to class.
-- --
"Bastard!" Edward growled as he walked home. There were still bits of glass in his skin and he could feel them prickling. He shook his sleeve and a few clattered to the sidewalk. "I swear he did it on purpose!"
Roy wasn't paying attention during their experiment…as usual. Instead, he was flirting with a girl across the room, not paying attention to the beaker full of chemicals that was overheating on the Bunsen Burner. He was only lucky Ed was there to push him out of the way when it exploded. And Ed was lucky he was wearing safety goggles—something he's originally been opposed to.
Most of the glass got caught in the lab coat Ed had been wearing, but some of it got into his left hand, embedding itself into the skin. The big pieces were easy to pick out, but the little ones…not so much. Ed had an old remedy for splinters that his mother used written on a notecard somewhere in the house, and he hoped it would also work on glass.
In his kitchen, he pulled a bunch of herbs and ingredients down and effectively marinated his hand. The logic behind that was if a marinade draws out flavor in food, it'll draw out little bits of unwanted stuff from under your skin. He stood for ten of fifteen minutes before his little cuts began to sting, the signal that the glass was out. He quickly moved his hand under cool running water to rinse off the marinade. He could still smell it, and decided to take a shower. He threw the mess of herbs down the sink.
The water was warm, but not too warm; just enough that the soap would rinse away the stink of Italian dressing and basil from his left hand. He ran shampoo through his hair and washed it all out, wincing as it stung his cuts.
"Ow…ow…ow…" he seethed. He cut off the water and climbed out, drying off with a towel quickly before pulling on his boxers an going to his room for a change of clothes.
It was oddly bright in that room, he thought; brighter than usual. He crossed the small room, passing the open curtains, to his dresser—
The open curtains?
He turned, with horror, to face the window. The curtains were not in place, and now he was standing in front of the glass in nothing but his underwear, automail exposed for the world to see. Others weren't supposed to see it. Weren't supposed to know of what he'd tried with the powers he once possessed. The metal was something he hid from the world, as though it was a mark of his sins.
No one was allowed.
But someone did.
A/N: Something I came up with randomly...there was no inspiration for this, I don't think. Wait, there might have been. Yeah, there was. I read a story where automail was a rarity, and this popped into my head. I hoped you liked it, and I'll have the second chapter up soon! Sorry for spelling and punctuation mistakes.
