Inspired by How to End Harry Potter In 200 Words or Less by BeeUtifulgirl
Now, since I don't actually own Harry Potter, I'm supposed to write a disclaimer here to say that I don't own Harry Potter.
But you know what? It would be much more simpler if I could just kill anyone who stands in the way of me and Harry Potter.
In fact, if it weren't for law enforcement and physics, then I'd be UNSTOPPABLE!
Unfortunately, it seems that law enforcement and physics just won't go away.
Now, let's pretend that there's no law that says you can't kill people with magic. And I have my MagiQuest wand ready.
AVADA KEDAVRA!
Hmm. It didn't work.
Oh great, the guards are coming again.
Back to the insane asylum.
You see, this would all be better if only I owned Harry Potter! But I don't own it.
THIS IS STUPID!
Oh wait, Mr. Fluffypants is here! He's the only company I get around this asylum...
Dear Reader,
If you are reading this, then it means that you are one of the many, many people who would like to give Harry Potter a nice kick in the butt. You may be one of the Death Eaters serving under the Dark Lord, or you may even be He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named-Unless-You-Are-Harry-Potter-Or-Albus-Dumbledore-Because-They-Are-The-Only-Ones-Awesome-Enough-To-Say-His-Name-And-Everyone-Else-Are-Just-Weenies-Who-Are-To-Scared-To-Say-A-Name himself. Congratulations! You are not alone in thinking that Harry Potter is an idiot who has no magical talent.
This book is designed to give you an idea on ways that you can kill the Potter boy. These drabbles are creative ways to kill him, because let's face it, Avada Kedavra gets annoying after a while. (We apologize for those who accidentally died while reading the Avada Kedavra in the last sentence. We apologize for the last one, too. However, we have not seen the urge to remove the Killing Curse from this story, so if you have died while reading this, this story may not be for you.)
We welcome more ideas on how to kill Harry, so please review with anything you think is original. May the evilness be with you.
Signed,
nony0mous
