AN: This is the updated chapter one. Enjoy. If you're new to this story and are curious as to what the chapter was before, send me a PM and I'll get it to you. :)
Reviews would be lovely.
Also, I don't swear, so this fic will have very little swearing in it. It's rather odd for me to write it at all. xD
Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter. ;)
Summary: She didn't know how it had happened, exactly. All she knew was that it had crept up on her slowly, gradually, until it was consuming her. How many times had she told him to bugger off and leave her be, and now all she wanted was for him to be with her, next to her. She listened for his footsteps at night, showing that he was coming back to the Heads' common room.
Oh, yes. Lily Evans was hopelessly in love with James Potter.

Chapter One. You Are My Constant.

September 1st

"Are you quite sure you have everything, Lily?" my mum asks me for the fortieth time today. It's September 1st and I'm about to board the Hogwarts Express, but before I can do that I have to deal with the water works. In other words, my crying mother. Now don't get me wrong, I love my parents dearly, but what seventeen year old wants to deal with sobbing parents in front of all of her friends?

"Yes, mum," I say, sighing in exasperation and rolling my eyes. My father chuckles and Petunia glares. Mum engulfs me in a teary hug and squeezes me before holding me out at arm's length and inspecting me. "Well," she says looking me up and down. "You look pretty, Lily-love. Be good, owl us as often as you can, and do well in your classes. Your father and I are so proud of you." She frowns as if she's forgetting something. Knowing mum, she probably has, but she's shaking her head and moving away and then I'm wrapped up in the arms of my dad.

"Stay safe, button," he whispers in my ear. He pulls back and smiles at me. "And do write us, Lils. Your mother will have a fit if you don't." Mum smacks his arm and he grins at her. Disgustingly sweet, those two. I shake my head at them and laugh.

I turn to Petunia, who's looking anywhere but at me and twirling a flat brown curl around her finger. She's bored and probably wishes she was with that walrus of a boyfriend of her's, Vernon. I personally can't stand him and am curious as to what possessed my sister to agree to date the fat lug. I give Tuney a quick hug and she freezes up. "Bye Tuney," I say loudly.

She sniffs and brushes her perfectly pressed clothes off as if I've contaminated them. "Freak," she hisses at me. I pretend not to hear her.

"Goodbye," I say quietly, looking at my family with a small smile. I'm used to the goodbyes, but this one is exceptionally bittersweet for me; it's the last time I'll board the train and leave for Hogwarts. I feel the tears prickling in my eyes as I turn and push through the barrier into Platform Nine-and-three-quarters.

I breathe in deeply, savoring the moment. I'm not really paying attention to where I'm going, so it's not a surprise when I run into someone. They've fallen flat on their face and I hold my hand out to help them up. They (or rather he, because it is a he. At least I think he is. If he's a girl then he's a very tall girl with a very masculine body. Rather creepy if you ask me. Maybe she's a Slytherin. It wouldn't surprise me a bit if she was. Of course, I don't even know if she's really a she yet. Blimey. This is difficult.) takes my hand (I guess she's not a Slytherin. Theywouldn't accept help from a Muggleborn.) and pulls themselves up.

I'm just about to apologize when I see who I tripped. It isa boy. In fact, it happens to be the boy I dislike more than anyone else. James Potter. "Oh," I say. "It's you." I glare my special 'reserved for Potter and Petunia' glare at him.

"Evans," he says, nodding to me. He's grinning. Lovely. I'll bet he's about to ask me to-

"Go out with me, Evans?"

I blink and then glare some more. So predictable, Potter."No, Potter," I say scathingly. "I will not go out with you. In fact, I'd rather date the Giant Squid than go out with you."

I turn on my heel and drag my trunk off the trolley and up into the train.

"Alice," I whine (Yes, Lily Anne Evans whines. Don't judge me. You would too if you were talking about Potter.) to my best friend as we search for a compartment. "He's absolutely unbearable. I can't stand him."

Alice rolls her eyes. "You know, Lils. From the way you talk about him and how often you talk about him, one would think you actually likeJames Potter." She states it calmly, as if she did not just suggest that I like that the biggest prat in the history of the universe.

Perhaps you're thinking, "Lily, isn't that a bit melodramatic?" Well, it's not. When I say that James Potter is the biggest prat ever, it's one hundred percent truth. I'm not even joking.

I stand there, gaping at Alice. She slides open a compartment and smiles at me. "I won't tell anyone, Lils." She winks at me and drags her trunk into the compartment. I follow, still flabbergasted at my supposed best friend's accusations. Wasn't she supposed to know me better than anyone else?

Alice has clearlynot read up on her duties as my best friend, number one being 'Never suggest that Lily Anne Evans likes James Potter.' I'll have to give her the friendship manual again and force her to read it. We wouldn't want another lapse in her sanity anytime soon.

I bite my finger nails (my worst habit) and stretch out on the bench in our compartment (my second worst habit: being lazy) and look at Alice intently. I suppose there should be signs of one's best mate going mad. I'd better keep a close eye on her just to make sure. She could be going to the dark side of things. This is bad. Very, very bad.

I keep staring at her and she stares back. "Is there something on my face, Lils?"

"Nope," I say, popping the 'p'.

She raises an eyebrow. "Then may I ask why you're staring at me?"

I ignore her question, clearly she doesn't see the folly in her earlier statements about my supposed crush on Potter. I decide to ask my own question in response to hers. "Have you read the manual lately?"

She looks at me like I'm insane, which I probably am, but that's beside the point. "What manual?"

Apparently she hasn't read it at all. "Um, never mind," I say.

Alice's gives me a look that clearly shows she thinks I'm mental. I don't mind one bit. I probably am a bit mental, but most of the best people are, so naturally I am. Drat, that sounds as egotistical as Potter. What am I turning into?!

I rub my eyes blearily as the compartment door slides open. Potter and his little band of followers have decided to crash our compartment. Joy. As if my train ride needed anymore excitement. Not that the thought of Potter excites me. Quite the contrary, actually. Potter bores me to death. I put my glare back on.

"Ladies," says Sirius Black. "The party has now begun." He grins and shakes his shaggy black hair. Some girls would kill for Sirius' hair. I am not one of them. I prefer my own red hair, thank-you-very-much. He thinks it looks cool when he shakes it around (just like Potter thinks it looks cool when he runs his fingers though his) but it doesn't it just makes him look like a dog. Irony, perhaps? Sirius is the Dog Star, after all. Maybe his parents had a bit of insight into his later life.

I turn this over in my mind, ignoring the other Marauders. I'm only brought back from my thoughts of Sirius Black's hair (I sound just like one of his fangirls now. I'm not. I swear. I would rather die than join the fan club of any of the Marauders, however gorgeous their hair might be.) when my legs are picked up and dumped unceremoniously over the edge of my seat. The rest of my body follows my legs.

"Don't mind if I sit here, do you, Evans?" asks Black as he makes himself comfortable on my bench, stretching out over the entire thing.

I glare. "Black," I say as I clench my jaw. "You are in my seat." My words are carefully punctuated and there's a slight pause in between each of them. I'm getting mad, which is nothing new when I'm around the Marauders. The beginning of this year has been just lovely already. Please note the sarcasm.

Black shrugs and looks down at me from the bench. "I don't see your name on it." He winks at his mates, who are sitting normally on the other bench with Alice. Except for Pettigrew, he's on the floor eating Bertie Bott's.

My face must be turning red from the force of my scowl. Alice seems to sense that I'm about to explode because she scoots over on her bench and pat the space next to her. I scowl at her too. The space is right next to Potter. She's planned this. It must be a plot.

I grumble as I sit down next to Potter. I as scoot as far away from Potter as I can. I can feel him looking down at me. Curses upon being short. I turn and glare up at her, while Alice shifts uncomfortably next to me.

"Um, Lils?" she says. "Would you mind giving me some more space? I'm literally pressed against the window. I turn my scowl on her. She smiles innocently. Yup, definitely planned this.

I hate her. I really, really do. I really hate her.

I definitely need a new best friend. Preferably one who does not doubt my intense hate of Potter. Pretty much any other girl would do. Too bad Marlene graduated last year. She would have made a nice makeshift best friend. Humph. I guess I'm stuck with Alice.

I move over a few inches. My leg is right next to Potter's and they're almost touching. I yawn. Being angry at your best mate takes a lot of energy. My eyelids are getting heavy, but I don't realize that I've fallen asleep until I'm being shaken awake later on.

I frown and snuggle down into my mattress. "Not now, mum," I mumble groggily. "Five more minutes."

There's laughter around me and I open one eye. I'm not at home. I'm not in my own snuggly warm bed. I'm most definitely not being woke up by my mother. No, I'm on the Hogwarts Express, sprawled across Potter, and being poked in the stomach by Alice. We've arrived at the Hogsmeade station.

I do what any normal person would do upon finding out that they slept on the biggest prat in the world: I screamed. Loudly. Potter, Alice, and the others winced as I probably broke their eardrums.

"ALICE!" I shout. She smiles innocently. I have no words. I simply gather up my belongings and stomp out of the compartment. My escape would have been completely amazing had I not realized that I had forgotten my trunk.

I stalked back into the compartment and yanked my trunk out behind me, ignoring the snickering laughter of my so-called best mate and worst enemies. Today has not been my day at all.


Alice joins me at the Sorting. She scoots next to me on the bench and leans over, whispering in my ear, "I'm sorry, you know." I ignore her, clapping politely for a new Ravenclaw.

Alice nudges me with her elbow and I turn my evil eye on her. "Alice," I say calmly. "Would you care to explain to me just whatpart of letting me sleep on Potter sounded like a good idea?" She freezes.

"Well," she begins, much louder than necessary. I'm sure people on the other side of the world can hear her. "I just thought that it might give you some time to discover you hidden feelings for one James Potter." In the mostly quiet hall, Alice's voice sounds like it's yelling. I cringe.

Professor McGonagall looks at us severely. "As fascinating as Miss Evans feelings for Mr. Potter are, we're in the middle of a Sorting, ladies, and your conversation can wait for the feast."

I turn redder than red. Curses on being a redhead; it makes one's blushes really stand out. I smack Alice upside the head and refuse to look up from the table. Odd, I never realized just how interesting the wood grain is. Alice sniggers.

I can feel eyes watching me from across the room and look up, still incredibly embarrassed. That was worse than when Potter would ask me out in front of everyone. Now he probably thinks I actually - cringe - like him. From across the Great Hall, I meet the eyes of Snape. I send a glare his way and look back down. My ex-best friend. My heart hurts a little and I continue my extensive study of the wood grain.


The Sorting is finally over and I look up at Dumbledore, who is opens the feast. The food appears on the tables and I dig in, scooping a large pile of mashed potatoes onto my plate. I take some of the sliced turkey and two rolls and then begin to eat. I'm starved. Again, being mad at your best mate takes quite a bit of energy. Good thing it doesn't happen every day. If it did, I would be in a constant state of hunger and weigh much more than I should. I help myself to more potatoes. The food here at Hogwarts tastes amazing, especially on the first night back. Must be the magic.

As the feast comes to a close, Dumbledore stands up, "To all the new students here at Hogwarts, welcome, and to those who are returning, welcome back! Before we conclude the feast, allow me to simply state the rules. As always, the Forbidden Forest is just that: forbidden. Mr. Filch has posted a list of contraband items. I would encourage you to look over it to refresh your memory. Remember that these are dark times, but hope is not lost. Rather, now is the time when we need hope and friendship even more than before. Not all is lost if we still have hope," he says quietly and then continues. "Also, if Mr. James Potter and Miss Lily Evans would stay after the feast, it would be most appreciated. Thank you." The twinkle returns to Dumbledore's eyes and he returns to his seat.

I hyperventilate. "Alice," I hiss.

She looks at me and says coolly, "Ah, back to speaking to me, are we?"

I stick my tongue out and continue in a panic, "If this is about what you said during the Sorting, I'll gut you."

Alice rolls her eyes at me, "Do you seriously think that Dumbledorewould get involved with your crush on James?" I stare at her. She's not joking anymore. She really does think that I like Potter. I wonder who Obliviated her. Clearly this is not my best mate of nearly seven years. My best mate of nearly seven years would know that I want nothing more than for Potter to drop off a cliff and die.

Well, maybe that's a little harsh. I guess I just want him to move to Antarctica and live with little penguins and leave me alone.

Dinner finished entirely too fast for my liking and I find myself walking to the Staff Table. I don't look at Potter and I don't look at Dumbledore. I stare at the floor. Huh, the stones are almost as interesting as the table...

"Now," begins Dumbledore. I look up. "I'm sure you're wondering why I've asked you to stay." He looks at the both of us and smiles, eyes twinkling. This is not good. He's going to ask us about our relationship. Or lack thereof. I'm sure Potter would be more than happy to inform everyone that he was dating me. But he's not. Nor will he ever have the opportunity to brag about dating me, because I WILL NEVER DATE POTTER.

There. I mentally cross my arms and stick my tongue out at the two of them. Juvenile, yes, but incredibly satisfying.

Potter's nodding, so I do too. "Yes, sir," I say.

Dumbledore claps his hands together, "Well, Mr. Potter and Miss Evans, in an attempt to answer all of your questions at once, you have been chosen to lead your fellow students this year. You are Head Boy and Girl." He winks at the two of us. "Your new common and bedrooms are behind the portrait of Ug the Unreliable. The password is 'duty'. I trust that you, unlike Ug, will be reliable and responsible in your duties." He nods to us and then leaves.

I stand there dumbstruck. Did he just say that I, Lily Anne Evans, am Head Girl? My speechlessness is replaced by fits of giggles. This is the best joke the Marauders have ever played on me. Getting Dumbledore in on it was a stroke of brilliance. I hold my stomach as I laugh and my eyes stream. This is not happening. Why in the world would anyone make Potter and I Heads? We'll kill each other within the first few meetings.

I look up at Potter in between giggles and say, "Good prank, Potter. I'm genuinely amused for once." I wipe at my eyes.

He looks bewildered. "What do you mean, good prank? I didn't do this!"

I raise an eyebrow, "Sure you didn't." With the incident on the train and then Alice's declaration at dinner, I'm in no mood to deal with Potter's immaturity. He's getting on more than my nerves. Suddenly I'm very tired. I yawn and wander out of the Great Hall in the direction of the Gryffindor Tower. I need Alice.


I find Alice in our usual dorms. She has all of her things spread out on the floor and is organizing her chest of drawers. Typical Alice, getting unpacked on the first night. I leave it for the next day as I'm normally to tired and stuffed to do it after the feast.

I open the door with a bang. Alice jumps. "Alice," I say dramatically, as I fall backwards onto my bed. "I'm Head Girl according Potter's latest prank. Quite brilliant really. Dumbledore even helped with..." I trail off when I catch a glimpse of Alice's face. She's looking at me like I've grown a second head or perhaps a third arm.

She continues to stare at me. "Um, Lils?"

I close my eyes and make a noncommittal noise in the back of my throat.

Alice comes and sits next to me on the edge of my bed. "Maybe, Lils," she says cautiously. "Maybe this wasn't a prank. Think about it, Dumbledore always talks to the new Head Boy and Girl after the feast." She pats my arm and shakes her head, short blonde hair bouncing. I've always liked Alice's hair...

Sheesh. What is it with me and hair today? First Sirius' and now Alice's. I really need to get over this weird fascination with other people's hair.

"Lily, I really think that this wasn't a prank. You're the best choice for the job and Potter, well, Potter's a leader and Quidditch captain, so he's a natural choice as well." Alice gives me a small smile. "And besides. Your trunk isn't even in here and I'm willing to bet it's in the Head's dorms."

I open my eyes. Strange. My trunk isn'tin here. I groan and sit up. "You really think I'm Head Girl?"

Alice nods.

I fall back on the bed. Seventh year just got a billion times more hectic. "Bloody hell."


AN: The next updated chapter will be posted sometime later this week. :)
Today's date: 8/7/12