The Ring and the Rockets
(Author's note) In case you're curious, The Lord of the Rings 2: Judgment Day is somewhat on hold while I work through some writer's block. I wrote this story in the mean time, and I'll publish the other two chapters over the next couple of weeks. I hope you enjoy, and please review!
Chapter 1
Near darkness covered the pool outside the gates of Moria, save for what little light the stars gave and the single torch the fellowship carried as they made their way along the wall. They were eager to leave the open, but the little Gandalf had told them of Moria made more than one of them wish they were elsewhere. Frodo gazed across the water, and for a moment he thought he saw a ripple break the calm of the surface. The sight of it troubled him, but he wasn't sure why. There are plenty of things to make ripples in pools, he told himself. Why should I be worried?
He kept his head down and kept walking all the same.
…
Beneath the surface of the water, right under where the ripple had spread out, was a submarine that looked like a Magikarp. Perhaps it wasn't the most inconspicuous design for Middle-earth, but it was what it was. At the front, just above the unmoving eyes, a small periscope rose to the surface. Peering around in a circle, it stopped when it spied the fellowship.
Inside the submarine, Jessie looked into the periscope with one eye.
"There they are!" she announced. "Right on time!"
"Ooh, let me see!" said James, leaning over from his seat behind Jessie and pushing her out of the way. Grabbing the handles, he looked out at the group silently making their way along the water's edge.
"That's them all right! That one there must be-" he was interrupted as Jessie pushed him back into his seat.
"I can see that!" she said indignantly. "I'm sitting up front, so I'll use the periscope!"
"Will you two stop fighting so we can figure out a plan?" said Meowth, seated behind the now-sullen James. "How are we going to get the ring?"
"Right, Meowth. When they get to the gate, we'll be waiting for them under the water. When they try to open the gate, we'll burst out and surprise them! Before they can figure out what's going on, we'll already have the ring and be on our way back to Mordor!"
"Yes!" said James, perking up again. "And when Sauron has the ring, he'll give us a big raise, even a promotion!"
"And then he'll say, 'Well done Meowth! I knew I could count on you. You've done such a good job, I'm going to make you the top cat!'" declared Meowth. "Then I'll finally be number one again, not that stupid Persian!"
"Giovanni never thought we were good enough; but when we ace our first mission, Sauron will probably even put us in charge of all his orcs!" Jessie looked through the periscope again. "They're getting away; come on, let's follow them." After stowing the periscope, she began pumping the bicycle-style pedals beneath her seat while holding on to a pair of handlebars in front of her. James and Meowth did the same as the submarine began sliding through the water.
"Jessie," said James, "if we can afford to build an entire submarine, why couldn't we install a motor?"
"Shut up and pedal."
…
"Here it is," said Gandalf, "the west-gate of Moria."
The hobbits gazed in wonder as the wizard walked up to the bare wall and whispered glowing lines into existence, forming a closed doorway. The swirling designs shined like polished silver, yet they almost seemed to produce their own light.
"This is it?" asked Merry. "How do we open it?"
"It's quite simple," Gandalf replied. "These doors were sealed so that only a password could open them. We have only to speak the words, and-" He was cut of as a great splash from the lake showered them in water. Before any of them could see what was happening, white smoke poured out of the lake as a great light lit up their surroundings. Frodo covered his mouth and shied away from the commotion, but suddenly he could see two figures silhouetted in the smoke as music started playing.
"Prepare for trouble!"
"And make it double!"
"To protect Middle-earth from devastation!"
"To unite all orcs within our nation!"
"To denounce the evils of fellowships and love!"
"To extend our reach to the stars above!"
"Jessie!"
"James!"
"Team Rocket, blast off at the speed of light!"
"Hand over the ring or prepare to fight!"
"Meowth, that's right!"
With the smoke now cleared, the fellowship saw Team Rocket standing on top of their now-surfaced submarine, its glowing eyes now lighting the area. If the three of them were expecting a more vocal response, they must have been greatly disappointed; because the travelers simply stared in disbelief for a whole minute. Finally Jessie said, "Well, aren't you going to say something?"
It was Boromir who spoke first. "What new devilry is this?"
"We're not devilry, we're Team Rocket!" said Meowth, as if they were supposed to know what that meant (or why a cat was talking).
"And who is that?" asked Aragorn. "Are you some servants of the Dark Lord?"
"As a matter of fact, we are," said James. "And we're going to be the new employees of the month!"
Sam had no idea what to make of that, but he turned to Frodo and said, "They don't look like orcs. In fact, they look like elves with weird haircuts."
"And weirder hair colors," his master replied.
"Weird hair col-!" started Jessie indignantly, but she regained her composure. "Look, twerp, we're here for the ring, so hand it over and we can both be on our way."
"You shall not have the ring, servants of the Dark Power!" cried Gandalf. "Be gone, for you impede our quest!"
"…I suppose we should have expected this reaction," said James. "But that won't stop us from getting our promotion!" Reaching for his belt he pulled off a red and white ball. "Go, Koffing!"
Boromir raised his shield as James hurled the ball towards them, but instead of hitting them, the ball stopped in mid-air and opened into two halves. A bright light shot out of it, and coalesced into a sphere. The light faded to reveal a purple creature with holes all around it and a bizarre face on its front.
"Koffing, use smoke screen!"
The fellowship hacked and coughed as a cloud of smoke poured from the creature and surrounded them. Sam stumbled, trying to stay close to Frodo, wherever he was. Gandalf shouted some elvish words through his coughing, and the smoke began blowing away in a sudden wind. As the air cleared around him, Sam saw Meowth sneaking up towards Frodo, getting ready to pounce for the ring.
"You! Get away from him!" yelled the hobbit as he slashed at Meowth with his sword. Meowth was already surprised enough at the smoke blowing away, but when Sam's sword nicked him he went fleeing back to the submarine.
"Ow! He knows scratch attack!" he yelled, jumping back to the top of their vehicle.
"This isn't working James, try-AAH!" Jessie yelled in shock as a fireball from Gandalf's staff hit the trio.
"Some evil magic protects them!" shouted the wizard. "Even when flames engulf them it just lightly singes their hair and makes them look disheveled!"
"Who are you calling disheveled!?" shot back James, tendrils of smoke rising from him as he pulled out another pokéball. "Go-" he stopped as a great rumble sounded from beneath the waters.
"What was that?"
As if to answer his question, the water seethed as a dozen enormous tentacles shot upwards and wrapped themselves around the submarine. Team Rocket yelled in fright as they and the submarine were hoisted into the air.
"Where did they get a Tentacruel!?" yelled Meowth as the monster began crushing the submarine.
"I don't know, do something!"
Frodo huddled against the wall. The monster seemed to just be focused on the weird newcomers, but what would they do when it was finished with them?
Just as he was wondering, Gandalf yelled at everyone to follow him. Frodo looked over to see that he had managed to open the gate, and that the others were already bolting for safety. Sam pulled him ahead, but he needed no further encouragement as they both ducked inside.
"Hey, wait for us!" yelled Meowth as he fended off a tentacle that was trying to drag him into the water. The fellowship either ignored or didn't hear his plea as they disappeared into the dark doorway.
"Where do they think they're going?" demanded Jessie. "Can't they see we're in trouble?"
"Who cares, just send out all your Pokémon and-" James stopped as the submarine began sparking. "Oh great, now what?"
With a thunderous boom their once-proud submarine exploded, sending smoke and debris everywhere. The explosion destroyed the gate, leaving nothing more than a pile of rocks by the water. And as the monster fled back into the water, three figures and a purple sphere sailed away into the night sky.
"Wonderful," said Jessie, air rushing past her as they hurtled towards the horizon. "This all your fault, James!"
"Me? I'm the one who said we should have used a giant mechanical Beedrill!"
"What does it matter?" asked Meowth. "We didn't get the ring! What do we do now?"
"I suppose first we have to find them again, and who knows how long that will take?"
"There's one thing we're doing before that, though," said Jessie.
"What's that?"
"WE'RE BLASTING OFF AGAIN!"
