A/N: So this was written in ten minutes and it's just pure silliness. I own nothing.
"Ah here you are, Captain... please, take a seat."
"Yes Captain, it is a compelling matter."
"No Captain, not that important... Actually, it might be."
"No more babbling, yes Captain."
"Something quite disconcerting arose from your latest physical. It may cause quite a problem."
"Yes, it has to do with the sickness you've been experiencing."
"No Captain, you're not pregnant."
"Are you sure you don't want to sit down?"
"Right. Captain... it seems you've developed an allergy to coffee."
"No Captain, I'm not joking."
"Captain please, don't stand on the biobed."
"That would not be a prudent move..."
"Captain, those petri dishes were crucial to my current research!"
"I don't think Lieutenant Torres will assist you in dismantling my program photon by photon, no."
"If you don't put down that hypospray, I'll be forced to call security..."
"Very well, Doctor to-"
